strange and random happenstance

You might be asking yourself, what can I watch to get into that Royal frame of mind? Never fear, I watch way too many BBC productions and have a handy little list for you. It's even a little more off beat than you might expect, thinking I'll be all, just go watch Helen Mirren in The Queen... but no! And it's not because I haven't gotten around to watching that movie cause I'm kind of ho hum on the whole Helen Mirren thing, this is more, what I feel the Jubilee is about.

"Victoria and Albert" - Victoria Hamilton and Jonathan Firth
Get the all the haps on the only other Queen to make it 60 years. Very sweet story that I find is a far better dramatization than the newer The Young Victoria. I know, that's sacrilege saying that a non-Julian Fellowes adaptation is better than a Julian Fellowes adaptation, but I felt that the movie just took everything from the miniseries and condensed it down time wise with prettier actors (not dissing Jonathan Firth, the hottie), so we lose a lot of the interest and day to day mundanities and trials and tribulations that make Victoria and Albert amazing. Plus, Victoria being played by a Victoria, how can you miss out on that coolness, not to mention, she knocked it out of the park. Also, a young James Callis pre Battlestar Galactica and even pre Bridget Jones.

"Wallis and Edward" - Stephen Moore Campbell and Joely Richardson
Learn all you could want to know about Wallis and Edward without having to watch anything by Madonna. While I have to say that this love story doesn't interest me in the least, they are two selfish people who ended up befriending Nazis, needless to say, this is the reason that Queen Elizabeth is Queen! If Edward hadn't abdicated, George VI, Elizabeth's dad Bertie, would not have become king and then she would have never been Queen. Also Germany would probably rule us all... but that's beside the point. This is very well acted and stars some of my favorite actors, but still, be prepared for selfish people.

"Bertie and Elizabeth" - James Wilby and Juliet Aubrey
Before The King's Speech, the BBC did this wonderful little story about Bertie and his ascension to the throne. Most notable for me was this was the first time that I liked James Wilby in anything! Not that I disliked him before, he just is really really good an playing asses, Howards End, Gosford Park, I could keep going. Just a sweet little story about what happens when you unexpectedly become king... I'm sure there's probably some cross over with The King's Speech... but the thing is, I still haven't seen that yet... ok, yell at me now... it's Colin Firth and I should know better.

"The Queen's Sister" - Toby Stephens and Lucy Coho
A great in depth look at the wild younger sister of Queen Elizabeth, Princess Margaret. This was the first time I was exposed to the wonderful acting of Lucy Coho, who has now been in everything from Upstairs, Downstairs to Torchwood. I mainly watched it for Toby Stephens, that glorious acting son of Maggie Smith, but I found the story so interesting. While Elizabeth was keeping the country together after the death of her father, her sister was the flamboyant one. A troublesome marriage to a photographer who she later divorced, yet introduced her to a Bohemian lifestyle. Drugs, sex, it's got everything that you want to associate with royalty who try to keep their noses clean.

"Doctor Who - The Idiot's Lantern"
Now, you might be wondering why I'm recommending a random episode of Doctor Who from David Tennant's first season... I know, you're thinking I'm just trying to promote my love of Mark Gatiss, and, while yes, this could be true, I have other motives. This episode takes place during Queen Elizabeth's coronation! Sure there's an alien using television to control the world, but really, watch the costumes, the block party, the feeling that permeates this episode. This is what Britain was like when Elizabeth became Queen... I won't comment as to the veracity of their being aliens or not. Oh, and there's bunting!

Posted by Miss Eliza at 12:00 AM 0 comments  

Labels: Bertie and Elizabeth, Diamond Jubilee, Doctor Who, Gosford Park, Jonathan Firth, Julian Fellowes, Mark Gatiss, Queen Victoria, Stephen Moore Campbell, The 10th Doctor, Toby Stephens, Wallis and Edward

This summer the eyes of the world will be on England. Now, I don't mean to be rude, but I couldn't care less about the London Olympics... well, ok, the rumors that the Queen is in a James Bond parody that they filmed for the opening ceremonies is pretty cool, but that's because it's the Queen. That's why I'm excited. THE QUEEN! This weekend marks the main weekend for her Diamond Jubilee. Why it's in June when she was really made Queen in February, and not crowned until June of the following year, meaning 2013 is 60 years from the coronation, is beside the point. This weekend Queen Elizabeth II (or the first if you're in Scotland) will have been on the throne for 60 years!

This is the celebration I have been waiting for. Kate and Will, who cares! There are tons of royals and there will be tons more royal weddings. I'll easily live to see Kate and Will's kids getting married. But will any of us live to see a queen reign for 60 years again? NO! The combination of early coronation with longevity is unheard of. The last time England had a Diamond Jubilee it was Queen Victoria, and before that George III almost made it but was a few months shy. We're talking this event is the biggest event we will see in terms of Royal splendor ever. Except maybe if she holds on for another four years and does a "screw you Victoria, longest reigning monarch ever dance." Four more years! Four more years!

What can we expect? Well, first, we can expect her to be so awesome she bends the laws of space and time to make May's bank holiday weekend in June. She then went one further and has everyone taking a holiday for the coronation itself on the 5th. So four day weekend yo! I myself will be observing this four day weekend, and if anyone stateside denies me, they'll have the Queen to answer to.

So this coming weekend is the "heart" of the Jubilee Celebration with Epsom Derby, the Big Lunch and the Jubilee Pageant. So horse races, lots of block parties and food, but the big one, the Jubilee Pageant has me actually contemplating waking up at 4AM to start watching the live coverage on BBC America... almost... I have a DVR. "After lunch on Sunday, a flotilla of one thousand boats, many adorned with decorations and Union Jacks, will be launched down the Thames as part of the Jubilee Pageant. There will be music, geysers and even a floating belfry. The Queen herself will be on the barge from her beloved Royal Yacht Britannia." Can it get any more pageanty than that? Well, there is the whole concert on Monday, and the lighting of the final beacon, the last in a chain of more than 2000 beacons that are throughout the UK and Commonwealth countries. Then the Thanksgiving service at St. Paul's. The National Portrait Gallery is hosting The Queen: Art and Image, an exhibit that includes paintings and photographs by Lucian Freud, Cecil Beaton, Annie Leibowitz, and many others. One wonders if that Lucian Freud is the one the Queen hated and was bought by Deborah Mitford... I could go on and on about all the splendors. Suffice it to say I will just be sitting around in proper British Regalia, taking it all in, floating on a sea of tea.

What's proper British regalia for me you might ask? You should also be asking for yourself, because, this does require preparation, seeing as you have to get your hands on a corgi. Can't get a real one? A stuffed animal will suffice, though really, you should be prepared, you've had 60 years. For that Royal wave, might I suggest a nice pair of elbow length gloves, white of course. Then some nice pearls to set off the ensemble. A crown of some sort would be nice, but perhaps disrespectful, so go with some sort of interesting hat or fascinator. You are now all ready, get that tea steeping and you are set.

Posted by Miss Eliza at 12:00 AM 0 comments  

Labels: Corgis, Diamond Jubilee, George III, Queen Elizabeth, Queen Victoria, William and Kate

Dreamless by Josephine Angelini
Published by: Harper Teen
Publication Date: May 29th, 2012
Format: Hardcover, 496 Pages
To Buy

The official patter:
"Can true love be forgotten?

As the only scion who can descend into the Underworld, Helen Hamilton has been given a nearly impossible task. By night she wanders through Hades, trying to stop the endless cycle of revenge that has cursed her family. By day she struggles to overcome the fatigue that is rapidly eroding her sanity. Without Lucas by her side, Helen is not sure she has the strength to go on.

Just as Helen is pushed to her breaking point, a mysterious new Scion comes to her rescue. Funny and brave, Orion shields her from the dangers of the Underworld. But time is running out—a ruthless foe plots against them, and the Furies' cry for blood is growing louder.

As the ancient Greek world collides with the mortal one, Helen's sheltered life on Nantucket descends into chaos. But the hardest task of all will be forgetting Lucas Delos.

Josephine Angelini's compelling saga becomes ever more intricate and spellbinding as an unforgettable love triangle emerges and the eternal cycle of revenge intensifies. Eagerly awaited, this sequel to the internationally bestselling Starcrossed delivers a gritty, action-packed love story that exceeds all expectations."

I've been wanting to read this series for awhile, even more since the RT Convention... sigh, there are too many books!

Changeling by Philippa Gregory
Published by: Simon Pulse
Publication Date: May 29th, 2012
Format: Hardcover, 272 Pages
To Buy

The official patter:
"Dark myths, medieval secrets, intrigue, and romance populate the pages of the first-ever teen series from #1 bestselling author of The Other Boleyn Girl.
Italy, 1453. Seventeen-year-old Luca Vero is brilliant, gorgeous—and accused of heresy. Cast out of his religious order for using the new science to question old superstitious beliefs, Luca is recruited into a secret sect: The Order of the Dragon, commissioned by Pope Nicholas V to investigate evil and danger in its many forms, and strange occurrences across Europe, in this year—the end of days.

Isolde is a seventeen-year-old girl shut up in a nunnery so she can’t inherit any of her father’s estate. As the nuns walk in their sleep and see strange visions, Isolde is accused of witchcraft—and Luca is sent to investigate her, but finds himself plotting her escape.

Despite their vows, despite themselves, love grows between Luca and Isolde as they travel across Europe with their faithful companions, Freize and Ishraq. The four young people encounter werewolves, alchemists, witches, and death-dancers as they head toward a real-life historical figure who holds the boundaries of Christendom and the secrets of the Order of the Dragon.

The first in a series, this epic and richly detailed drama is grounded in historical communities and their mythic beliefs. It includes a medieval map of Europe that will track their journey; and the interior will include relevant decorative elements as well as an interior line illustration. And look for a QR code that links to a note from the author with additional, detailed information about the setting and the history that informed the writing. With Philippa Gregory’s trademark touch, this novel deftly brings the past—and its salacious scandals—vividly and disturbingly to life."

I wonder how Gregory's bid to pry her way into the YA market will work... I'm betting on a fail.

The Janus Affair by Pip Ballantine and Tee Morris
Published by: Harper Voyager
Publication Date: May 29th, 2012
Format: Paperback, 432 Pages
To Buy

The official patter:
"Evildoers beware! Retribution is at hand, thanks to Britain's best-kept secret agents!!

Certainly no strangers to peculiar occurrences, agents Wellington Books and Eliza Braun are nonetheless stunned to observe a fellow passenger aboard Britain's latest hypersteam train suddenly vanish in a dazzling bolt of lightning. They soon discover this is not the only such disappearance . . . with each case going inexplicably unexamined by the Crown.

The fate of England is once again in the hands of an ingenious archivist paired with a beautiful, fearless lady of adventure. And though their foe be fiendishly clever, so then is Mr. Books . . . and Miss Braun still has a number of useful and unusual devices hidden beneath her petticoats."

Steampunk yeah! This new series was heartily endorsed by my friend John at Murder by the Book.

Blue-Blooded Vamp by Jaye Wells
Published by: Oribit
Publication Date: May 29th, 2012
Format: Paperback, 336 Pages
To Buy

The official patter:
"The epic conclusion to the amazing Sabina Kane urban fantasy series.

Sabina Kane is on the hunt. Her prey: Cain, the father of the vampire race and the one who murdered her family and her friends. Unfortunately, Cain is hunting Sabina, too.

The one man who holds the key to defeating Cain is, of course, Abel. A mage with secrets to spare and, hopefully, the power to match it. Unfortunately, for Sabina, he's in Rome and may not want to be found.

Sabina sets out for Italy with her friends, Giguhl and Adam Lazarus, to track down the only man who can get her the revenge she hungers for. But will he help her or oppose her? And just who is Abel, really? Worst of all, when Sabina figures out the goddess Lilith has a plan for her-she realizes this trip is getting deadlier by the minute. As they say: when in Rome-SURVIVE."

Yeah new Sabina Kane, boo last Sabina Kane.

Posted by Miss Eliza at 12:00 AM 0 comments  

Labels: Blue-Blodded Vamp, Changeling, Dreamless, Jaye Wells, Josephine Angelini, Murder by the Book, Philippa Gregory, Pip Ballantine, Sabina Kane, Steampunk, Tee Morris, The Janus Affair, Tuesday Tomorrow

Withering Tights by Louise Rennison
Published by: HarperTeen
Publication Date: June 28th, 2011
Format: Hardcover, 288Pages
Rating: ★★★
To Buy
Tallulah Casey has gotten into an "elite" school for performing arts for the summer in the Yorkshire Dales, Dother Hall. If she's deemed worthy at the end of her time there she'll be able to stay on as a full time student.  She's soon wondering if she made the right decision. This land of the Brontes is one she doesn't know. Plus, she doesn't know anybody. She's staying with a family who are very outdoorsy, have two young boys and have decorated her room with squirrels. She has the slippers to prove they're a little nutty. Then there's the marauding youths of the village, Cain and his brothers, who also happen to be a band. Luckily Tallulah quickly makes friends with Vaisey, a girl who is also going to Dother Hall but is staying at the local pub, The Blind Pig, till her room is ready, and the pub owners daughter, Ruby. Soon she's in a world of eccentric actors in a crumbling pile of a hall, it does tend to have random leaks and fires, while trying to navigate the fog that is puberty. Why do boys act like they do? And why is Cain always around and Ruby's brother never around enough? If she's unable to secure her place in the school she will never be able to answer these question or stay with her new friends.

It seems to me that Louise Rennison just took the majority of traits possessed in her previous iconic character, Georgia Nicholson, and inverted them. Where Georgia was rather short and well endowed, here we have a gangly girl who's flat chested, and also happens to be related to Georgia. Georgia was confident, Tallulah isn't. Also, of course there are older boys, and a band, as per Georgia's tale, an owl versus a cat, and two annoying young boys versus one little sister. I guess I was just expecting something different or more from Louise's newest venture. This seemed more of the same with a new cast of character transposed to Yorkshire. While I love Louise's style, after ten Georgia Nicholson books it got kind of stale, and I don't feel that this was different enough to add something new to the repertoire. Plus, I thought the writing might mature, with perhaps an older character, instead she went younger, with Tallulah being 14. The diary style is also not helping the plot. While it worked for Georgia, it's not working for Tallulah. She's supposed to have this innate sense of humor while acting, embodying everything from an owl to Heathcliff wannabe Cain with perfection. We don't see this, we just hear that "everyone thought I was wonderful." This makes Tallulah a flat character, much like her chest. Show don't tell! Let us discover for ourselves her innate acting ability, don't just tell us what she was told by others.

I don't mean to be all mean and rag on this book. It was a fun quick read by an author who is very good at capturing the loopy, the loony and the off-putting. I just expected more. More plot, more adventure and less retreading of the same ground. I'm hoping that in the next book this series will take off in a way it hasn't yet. There are so many areas ripe for parody with teenagers and the literature of The Brontes. I just hope that Louise doesn't waste them and have Cain be a pale imitation of Heathcliff and then draw the series out for another decade.

Posted by Miss Eliza at 12:00 AM 0 comments  

Labels: Bronte, Georgie Nicholson, Louise Rennison, Tallulah Casey, Withering Tights, Wuthering Heights, Yorkshire

A Charmed Death: A Bewitching Mystery Book 2 by Madelyn Alt
Published by: Berkley Prime Crime
Publication Date: December 5th 2006
Format: Paperback, 289 Pages
Challenge: Mystery and Suspense 2011
Rating: ★★★★
To Buy
Maggie is coming to terms with finding out that her small Indiana town has witches and that she's one of them. Before the events of the past few months she has always lived in an insular Midwestern mindset, wherein she's the odd duck out. But meeting Liss, the resident witch, and being brought into her coven and her career, as a worker bee in Liss's store, Enchantments, has changed everything for Maggie. She's having a hard time coming to terms with this new world, but that's not to say it isn't fun while also being scary.

While working the Christmas rush one Saturday, teen queen Amanda enters the shop to buy a Christmas present for her mother to "get her out of the dog house." After dropping a cool $500 in cash, with much to spare, and having an altercation with local goth girl Tara, she walks out of the store and disappears that night, to be found dead near an old railway trestle a few days later. The town goes into morning with churches holding vigils and everyone wondering about the killer in their midst. Maggie, being a bit nosey, and also a bit sweet on the local cop Tom Fielding, she thinks that it's her duty to do what she can "magically" to help speed the investigation along. But it's less magic and more being in the right place at the right time and finding secrets that Amanda had squirreled away. The deeper Maggie investigates, the more secrets she starts to keep, the closer she gets to the killer... the closer she gets to death.

I originally picked up this series because it looked like a fun little bit of fluff. And that's what it is, fun fluff. What really captured me in this installment was the overtones of Twin Peaks brought from the West Coast and placed in Indiana. Because really, that tragedy could be any small town anywhere, and this goes to show that. When Madelyn Alt started describing the location of Amanda's body, I instantly saw Ronette Pulaski walking along those tracks having escaped the killer with the strains of music in the air.



This feeling carries nicely through the book, making it feel like a slightly modern version of Twin Peaks. What could Laura Palmer get up to with a digital camera? Moving beyond the world of Agent Cooper, there where times when I felt there was a very overly religiosity about the book. Being a Midwestern small town, I guess I can forgive a bit of it, but after awhile it grates on you when Maggie is for the 50th time wondering how this new world she's been exposed to fits into the typical Christian mentality. She has to move beyond doubt and just realize that she belongs in this new world she's discovered, why else would she have these gifts? Also, just a weird aside, but, why would a Ouija board freak her out and then the divining method that Liss shows her, which is just a classier version of a Ouija board be A OK!?! Ah well, people do have flaws, and I guess these are Maggie's. At least the ending threw a slight curve ball so that the perp I had fingered was only a slight red herring. I will definitely be picking up the next installment.

Posted by Miss Eliza at 12:00 AM 0 comments  

Labels: 2011 Reading Challenge, A Charmed Death, Agent Cooper, Madelyn Alt, Twin Peaks

Dandy Gilver and an Unsuitable Day for Murder by Catronia McPhearson
Published by: Minotaur
Publication Date: May 22nd, 2012
Format: Hardcover, 304 Pages
To Buy

The official patter:
"Aristocratic and delightfully witty amateur sleuth Dandy Gilver was greeted with boisterous cheers from readers and reviewers alike in Catriona McPherson’s previous outing, Dandy Gilver and the Proper Treatment of Bloodstains, which The Boston Globe named one of the best crime novels of 2011. In this new book in this charming and funny series, Dandy is caught between two feuding families who run rival department stores.

Dandy’s services are needed when the heiress to one of the stores goes missing. As Dandy starts to unravel long-hidden family secrets, she begins to discover disturbing connections, and it's not long before danger abounds."
The last book in this series was lauded with almost every award you can imagine, the newest should be just as good, one hopes.

The Girl in the Clockwork Collar by Kady Cross
Published by: Harlequin Teen
Publication Date: May 22nd, 2012
Format: Hardcover, 416 Pages
To Buy

The official patter:
"Sixteen-year-old Finley Jayne and her "straynge band of mysfits" have journeyed from London to America to rescue their friend Jasper, hauled off by bounty hunters. But Jasper is in the clutches of a devious former friend demanding a trade—the dangerous device Jasper stole from him…for the life of the girl Jasper loves. One false move from Jasper and the strange clockwork collar around Mei's neck tightens. And tightens.

From the rough streets of lower Manhattan to elegant Fifth Avenue, the motley crew of teens with supernatural abilities is on Jasper's elusive trail. And they're about to discover how far they'll go for friendship.

More than ever, Finley Jayne will rely on powerful English duke Griffin King to balance her dark magic with her good side. Yet Griffin is at war with himself over his secret attraction to Finley…and will risk his life and reputation to save her. Sam, more machine than man, finds his moody heart tested by Irish lass Emily—whose own special abilities are no match for the darkness she discovers on the streets.

Now, to help those she's come to care for so deeply, Finley Jayne must infiltrate a criminal gang. Only problem is, she might like the dark side a little too much…."

Oh, can't wait for Steampunk Summer!

The Enchantress by Michael Scott
Published by: Delacorte
Publication Date: May 22nd, 2012
Format: Hardcover, 528 Pages
To Buy

The official patter:
"The two that are one must become the one that is all. One to save the world, one to destroy it.

San Francisco:
Nicholas and Perenelle Flamel have one day left to live, and one job left to do. They must defend San Francisco. The monsters gathered on Alcatraz Island have been released and are heading toward the city. If they are not stopped, they will destroy everyone and everything in their path.

But even with the help of two of the greatest warriors from history and myth, will the Sorceress and the legendary Alchemyst be able to defend the city? Or is it the beginning of the end of the human race?

Danu Talis:
Sophie and Josh Newman traveled ten thousand years into the past to Danu Talis when they followed Dr. John Dee and Virginia Dare. And it’s on this legendary island that the battle for the world begins and ends.

Scathach, Prometheus, Palamedes, Shakespeare, Saint-Germain, and Joan of Arc are also on the island. And no one is sure what—or who—the twins will be fighting for.

Today the battle for Danu Talis will be won or lost.
But will the twins of legend stand together?
Or will they stand apart—
one to save the world and one to destroy it?"

More Flamel, and San Francisco!

Taken by Storm by Jennifer Lynn Barnes
Published by: Egmont USA
Publication Date: May 22nd, 2012
Format: Hardcover, 320 Pages
To Buy

The official patter:
"In the eye of a storm stands Bryn, the alpha of the Cedar Ridge werewolf pack. She is young. Female. Human. Physically weaker than any werewolf, she could never survive a battle with another alpha, the strongest, fiercest, and canniest of his pack.

Yet she cannot refuse a summons from the werewolf Senate. A rogue werewolf is attacking humans. The risk of exposure threatens to destroy pack life, and the center of the crisis is Cedar Ridge territory—her own lands.

Bryn has no choice but to attend the meeting, a gathering of the most powerful werewolves on the continent. The subject is the rogue wolf, but Bryn knows the other packs want what she has. Her territory. Her females. Her pack.

They want her death.

Werewolf law prevents the other alphas from making a direct attack. It also prevents her former alpha, the mysterious and powerful Callum, from coming to her aid. But it doesn’t prevent Bryn from knowing what she wants. To keep her lands. To protect her pack.

To survive."

Jennifer Lynn Barnes was so nice when I met her at the RT Convention, so go out an buy her book!

Posted by Miss Eliza at 12:00 AM 0 comments  

Labels: Catronia McPearhson, Dand Gilver, Jennifer Lynn Barnes, Kady Cross, Michael Scott, Steampunk, Taken by Storm, The Enchantress

The Snake, the Crocodile and the Dog, Amelia Peabody Book 7 by Elizabeth Peters
Published by: Grand Central
Publication Date: 1992
Format: Paperback, 448 Pages
Challenge: Valley of the Kings, Mystery and Suspense 2011
Rating: ★★★
To Buy
The Peabody Emersons are having a heck of a time hiding Nefret's origins. It's not just that coming out of the desert with a girl is odd, it's the fact that they have to concoct and stick to a story about missionaries in order to protect the valley wherein she spent her entire life and ancient Egypt still exists to this day. There are many who would desire this knowledge in order to plunder the valley... and many who might see holes in their story if closely examined. While Nefret and Ramses stay back in England, Ramses having developed an "attachment" to Nefret, for the first time in years Emerson and Amelia will have an excavation all to themselves. Soon their plan is thwarted with many unusual happenings and the kidnapping of Emerson. Amelia would lay down her life to save her husband and it is not long till he is returned to her. But returned damaged and broken... he has amnesia and no longer knows who she is.

Advised by a queer little doctor, Amelia does not force herself or her affections on Emerson and they go to where they first met, because Emerson thinks he is still on that dig. Hoping against hope that he will remember while trying to maintain a dig is one thing. Hoping that the enemy, whomever it might be will not attack again is another thing entirely. Amelia must keep Emerson alive or there is no hope at all. Perhaps the master criminal is involved... only one of genius and cunning could have such diabolical and nefarious plans.

For some reason I found this book more than a little confusing. I should note though, that I was sick and on a lot of antibiotics at the time. But as one of my friends said: "Honey, you must be sick. These plots are never hard to follow. It's part of their charm. The Peabodys go to Egypt, Ramses, David or Nefret (or all three) get into trouble, Emerson gets mad, crime solved, happy ending. Their very predictability keep me coming back." There is such a charm in the predictability of a happy ending coupled with the height of Egyptology. Though this one left me a little flat, not just because of the kidnapping, but more because of the soap opera tragedy of Emerson having amnesia and then another soap opera trope that I won't mention because it is strictly under the "spoilers" section. For the longest time I was debating back and forth as to whether Emerson really had amnesia or not, which I'm sure Peters did on purpose. For such a loving and stalwart relationship, it's really the first time since the beginning where Amelia gets to be uncertain in Emerson's love for her. I think Peters must have taken glee in shaking the unshakable, because only a complete erasure of Amelia from Emerson's memory could take away his feelings for her, and I'm sure Peters gets enough letters asking why there is no conflict (in their relationship) between them instead of Amelia just gloating about how lucky she is to have such a virile and sexy husband, even if they are couched in the terms of the day. Which, I will admit, sometimes get a bit much.

Also, it seems to me that Peters must be tired with her formulae a bit because she's starting to shake it up a little. In the previous installment, The Last Camel Died at Noon, she tried, and in my mind, failed, to do a more Rider Haggard adventure book. In this installment, because of a great deal of the characters being back in England, we have the introduction of an epistolary novel on top of the normal day to day story. While I enjoyed the letters, Ramses being hilariously Ramses in all of them, and while they added to the plot, the letters seemed to break up the plot and make it chunky. Almost as if there was a lull and then "Breaking News: This in from England!" For a seamless narrative and plot this did not do the book any favors. Worst of all though was the shoehorning in of their tragedies into the myth of "The Snake, The Crocodile and the Dog." Amelia seemed convinced that they where being sent three trials, but where and how? There's a kidnapping, a few attacks and a possibly rapid dog. Now, I see how you can derive the dog, but how are the others a snake or a crocodile? I don't think this was a lapse in my fevered brain patterns, but a failing on Peters part.

Posted by Miss Eliza at 12:00 AM 0 comments  

Labels: Amelia Peabody, Egypt, Elizabeth Peters, Emerson, H. Rider Haggard, Nefret, Ramses, The Last Camel Died at Noon, The Snake The Crocodile and the Dog

The Secret History by Donna Tratt
Published by: Vintatge
Publication Date: 1992
Format: Paperback, 559 Pages
Rating: ★
To Buy
Richard arrives at Hampen College in New England because it's the only school that will take him in and give him some money. It's an eccentric little school and Richard doesn't quite know what he will study. Having studied Greek back in California, he is drawn to this elite circle that has formed around Julian, a professor who holds his classes in his office as a kind of salon, wherein he shall be your sole educator, in the vein of true classicism. Once Richard finally finagles his way in, he becomes a part of this eccentric circle consisting of Henry, the nominal leader, Francis, the literary closet gay, Bunny, the rather dimwitted leach, and Charles and Camilla, the down at heels twins. They are his life entire. Every moment is spent with them or thinking of them. Yet there are secrets. One secret will tear them apart from within. Because, what if, in the pursuit of knowledge, to experience all the Greeks did, a ceremony was performed. A ceremony that had unintended consequences. A ceremony that will fracture the group. A ceremony that was evil and will leave evil in it's wake.

This book reaches the lofty position of one of the worst books I've read in a long time, not just because of the glacial pacing and the unlikable characters, but because of two majorly flaws. There is a disconnect in the book between what it is and what it wants to be. This dislocation gives the book a jarring feeling, like trying to force a square peg in a round hole. The book felt so not of it's time. There is a timelessness to it that feels routed in the early half of the 20th century. You feel like you could be at a small sequestered college surrounded by autumnal foliage and the cast of Brideshead Revisited would wander around the corner. But a coke addict with a boom box is what you usually get. This book is shockingly in the 80s. It doesn't feel like the 80s. The little quiet and queer Greek scholars feel of another time. Which I guess might have been Donna Tartt's purpose... but if it was, it failed. Every time something "80s" happened it felt like an anachronism. A splash of cold water in the face that made me think for the 100th time, why am I still reading this book.

The disconnect isn't just a temporal one, but one of character. Bunny has purposely conflicting descriptions. He is young, very clothes conscious, is a skinflint, so your mind starts to build this very wane, dapper man, who might be slightly effeminate. A Sebastian Flyte of the 80s if you would. For chapters you have this image, and it builds, and gains force, this is who Bunny is. With a name like Bunny, how could you not get this image. Yet then Tartt contradicts this all with, no, he's a good old boy who's a homophobe that is very muscularly built with a fondness for sports. Say what!?! The name Bunny was ironic? You let me believe this image for hundreds of pages to then throw in a curve and make this character no longer work for me. People are built of contradictions, this is true. Yet why go out of the way to obviously create all these Brideshead references, with Venice and Bunny and what have you, only to go, fooled you. Rule one of writing, you don't alienate your reader. They'll get snarky, they'll write crap reviews, and they will never buy your books again, and what will you do without an income?

The second problem I had was with the issue they had of what to do with Bunny. Kill him, move on, the end, I just cut your book by 400 pages Donna. Because that is the evil that comes of their ceremony, Bunny becomes a blackmailer. These people don't have morals, we've already seen that. Incest, it's ok, in fact, it's kind of sexy. Being bisexual with friends occasionally, that's fine too. Heavy drug use, alcohol abuse, Bacchanalia's, murder, they've done it all. Yet they hesitate to kill the one person who they loath, who is blackmailing them, and who was never much of a friend. Uh... where did the sudden morals come from? Perhaps because Donna Tartt was being paid by the word and the longer she could stretch out this anguish, this pointless debate about the inevitable, the more healthy her check at the end.

I didn't know what to expect going into this book. I had heard so many things about it. I had some sort of vague idea that this was going to be an intriguing mystery about some horrific crime, something "beyond the boundaries of normal morality". Instead I got 500 plus pages of whiny eccentric Greek scholars dithering about the inevitable and revelling in debauchery in such a boring way, it didn't feel debauched. The only mystery this book offered was of it's laudatory nature. Please, why? I agree with another review I read, I resent the time I spent on this book. Next please?

Posted by Miss Eliza at 12:00 AM 0 comments  

Labels: Brideshead Revisited, Bunny, Donna Tartt, Greek, Sebastian Flyte, The Secret History of the Pink Carnation, Venice