strange and random happenstance

The Taming of the Tights by Louise Rennison
Published by: HarperTeen
Publication Date: September 17th, 2013
Format: Hardcover, 256 Pages
Rating: ★★
To Buy

Tallulah Casey, despite any sign of talent or acting ability, is back at Dother Hall in Yorkshire learning to be dramatic in a school with barmy teachers whose credentials are dubious. But school doesn't matter, only boys do. Tallulah is denying that she had a moment with the Dark Black Crow of Heckmondwhite, Cain, and instead thinking about the unattainable Alex and the taken Charlie. Sadly, her moment with Cain has led to the Bottomly sisters threatening her, but what can they do really? I mean, their mother has been trying to shoot Cain for months and has only succeeded in killing a goat. At the school they are trying to find ways to raise money to get a roof again and running water. The local reform academy for boys might just have some monetary interest, but what is the future of the Hall when Charlie has dumped his girlfriend and agreed to go out with Tallulah! Cain and everyone else be damned, especially Lulah's uncontrollable knees. She has a chance with Charlie!

Somebody stop me from reading these books. I mean it, seriously I need an intervention. What was once fun and unique is now a chore. Rennison just keeps writing the same book over and over again and never having any plot or any anything. And people are seriously giving this book five stars? Is it just nostalgia for your childhood? Because, bizarre rap battles and owlets do not make a book. And how is Honey a star in Hollywood? She has a severe lisp! I seriously can almost not be bothered to write this review because Louise was obviously not bothered to write a half-way decent book. Therefore in the tradition of Georgie Nicholson and Tallulah Casey, here is a list like you'd see in the appendix of these books, it's all I can be bothered to do.

What Louise Rennison can do:

• Funny dialogue
• Create awkward situations that are humorous
• Skewer classic plays
• Barmy characters
• Insane pets
• Broody Bronte Boys

• Write a book with a plot
• Evolve beyond the love triangle (quadrangle?) premise
• Give us any reason to understand why Tallulah is talented or liked
• Have the time frame of a book be longer then a few weeks
• Write this series anymore

• Viking Helmets
• Concerts/plays being the moment the book builds to
• Creepy guy moments (Charlie likes her because she is vulnerable? What?)
• Snog lists
• "Named" groups of friends, ie, Ace Gang, Tree Sisters
• Repetitive inner dialogue
• Insane pets (she's used it once too often, move on)
• Boycrazy girls
• Weird lesbian jokes

Posted by Miss Eliza at 12:00 AM 0 comments  

Labels: Bronte, Georgie Nicholson, Louise Rennison, Tallulah Casey, The Taming of the Tights, Yorkshire

Withering Tights by Louise Rennison
Published by: HarperTeen
Publication Date: June 28th, 2011
Format: Hardcover, 288Pages
Rating: ★★★
To Buy
Tallulah Casey has gotten into an "elite" school for performing arts for the summer in the Yorkshire Dales, Dother Hall. If she's deemed worthy at the end of her time there she'll be able to stay on as a full time student.  She's soon wondering if she made the right decision. This land of the Brontes is one she doesn't know. Plus, she doesn't know anybody. She's staying with a family who are very outdoorsy, have two young boys and have decorated her room with squirrels. She has the slippers to prove they're a little nutty. Then there's the marauding youths of the village, Cain and his brothers, who also happen to be a band. Luckily Tallulah quickly makes friends with Vaisey, a girl who is also going to Dother Hall but is staying at the local pub, The Blind Pig, till her room is ready, and the pub owners daughter, Ruby. Soon she's in a world of eccentric actors in a crumbling pile of a hall, it does tend to have random leaks and fires, while trying to navigate the fog that is puberty. Why do boys act like they do? And why is Cain always around and Ruby's brother never around enough? If she's unable to secure her place in the school she will never be able to answer these question or stay with her new friends.

It seems to me that Louise Rennison just took the majority of traits possessed in her previous iconic character, Georgia Nicholson, and inverted them. Where Georgia was rather short and well endowed, here we have a gangly girl who's flat chested, and also happens to be related to Georgia. Georgia was confident, Tallulah isn't. Also, of course there are older boys, and a band, as per Georgia's tale, an owl versus a cat, and two annoying young boys versus one little sister. I guess I was just expecting something different or more from Louise's newest venture. This seemed more of the same with a new cast of character transposed to Yorkshire. While I love Louise's style, after ten Georgia Nicholson books it got kind of stale, and I don't feel that this was different enough to add something new to the repertoire. Plus, I thought the writing might mature, with perhaps an older character, instead she went younger, with Tallulah being 14. The diary style is also not helping the plot. While it worked for Georgia, it's not working for Tallulah. She's supposed to have this innate sense of humor while acting, embodying everything from an owl to Heathcliff wannabe Cain with perfection. We don't see this, we just hear that "everyone thought I was wonderful." This makes Tallulah a flat character, much like her chest. Show don't tell! Let us discover for ourselves her innate acting ability, don't just tell us what she was told by others.

I don't mean to be all mean and rag on this book. It was a fun quick read by an author who is very good at capturing the loopy, the loony and the off-putting. I just expected more. More plot, more adventure and less retreading of the same ground. I'm hoping that in the next book this series will take off in a way it hasn't yet. There are so many areas ripe for parody with teenagers and the literature of The Brontes. I just hope that Louise doesn't waste them and have Cain be a pale imitation of Heathcliff and then draw the series out for another decade.

Posted by Miss Eliza at 12:00 AM 0 comments  

Labels: Bronte, Georgie Nicholson, Louise Rennison, Tallulah Casey, Withering Tights, Wuthering Heights, Yorkshire

A Touch of Dead by Charlaine Harris
Published by: Ace
Publication Date: October 6th, 2009
Format: Hardcover, 208 Pages
To Buy

The official patter:
"Cocktail waitress Sookie Stackhouse is no typical southern belle. She can read minds. And she’s got a thing for vampires. Which, in a town like Bon Temps, Louisiana, means she’ll have to watch her back -- and neck...

New York Times–bestselling author Charlaine Harris has re-imagined the supernatural world with her “spunky” (Tampa Tribune) Southern Vampire novels starring telepathic waitress Sookie Stackhouse. Now, for the first time, here is every Sookie Stackhouse short story ever written -- together in one volume.

Stories include “Fairy Dust,” “One Word Answer,” “Dracula Night,” “Lucky,” and “Giftwrap.” "

Too many big name authors releasing books today, it's literally too hard to choose which to read first! If you are a true Sookie Stackhouse fan you know what a hassle it is trying to get your hands on all those Sookie short stories that have been published over the years in various anthologies, some now out of print. So this may come as a shock, but really who would have thought a publishing company could have actually thought of something useful? I wouldn't. But now for your enjoyment and extreme convenience, here are the Sookie short stories all compiled into a nice hardcover book to tide you over till book ten in May. The stories are more hit and miss than the high quality of the books, but there are a few gems in here.

Unseen Academicals by Terry Pratchett
Published by: Harper
Publication Date: October 6th, 2009
Format: Hardcover, 384 Pages
To Buy

The official patter:
"The 37th Discworld novel is set against a backdrop of the culture of football. Football has come to the ancient city of Ankh-Morpork — not the old fashioned, grubby pushing and shoving, but the new, fast football with pointy hats for goalposts and balls that go gloing when you drop them. And now, the wizards of Unseen University must win a football match, without using magic, so they’re in the mood for trying everything else.

The prospect of a Big Match draws in a street urchin with a wonderful talent for kicking a tin can, a maker of jolly good pies, a dim but beautiful young woman, who might just turn out to be the greatest fashion model there has ever been, and the mysterious Mr Nutt, who no one knows much about. As the match approaches, four lives are entangled and changed forever.

Because the thing about football – the important thing about football – is that it is not just about football."

Like the equation for L-Space, I have created my own formula for the day:
Terry Pratchett = god among men + the wizards of UU (Unseen University) + football = read this book now!

Wuthering Heights by Emily Bronte
Published by: HarperTeen
Publication Date: October 6th, 2009 (Originally 1847)
Format: Paperback, 448 Pages
To Buy

The official patter:
"Set amid the wild and stormy Yorkshire moors, Wuthering Heights, an unpolished and devastating epic of childhood playmates who grow into soul mates, is widely regarded as the most original tale of thwarted desire and heartbreak in the English language. "

But we must not forget the special Twilight fans edition of Wuthering Heights that's being released today! It is after all Bella and Edward's Favorite book....look the cover is similar to the other books (time for girlish squealing....I think not).

Lets hope that at least the Twilight phenomenon will get girls to read true literature like this....one hopes...there has to be a plus side right?

Are These My Basoomas I See Before Me? by Louise Rennison
Published by: HarperTeen (US)
Publication Date: October 6th, 2009 (US)
Format: Hardcover, 320 Pages
To Buy (US)

The official patter:
"A bit early to get swoony knickers but I have got them on.

For Georgia, the more things change, the more they stay the same. Just when she thought she was the official one-and-only girlfriend of Masimo, he's walked off into the night with the full hump, leaving Georgia all aloney on her owney—again. All because Dave the Laugh tried to do fisticuffs at dawn with him!

Two boys fighting over Georgia? It's almost as romantic as Romeo and Juliet . . . though perhaps a touch less tragic."

I don't know where my mind is! For all you people who've been desperately waiting for the final Georgia Nicholson book and then your humble blogger totally forgets because she was impatient and got the British edition back in July...anyways, it's out now, go, buy read, enjoy! I know I did!

Posted by Miss Eliza at 12:17 AM 2 comments  

Labels: Bella, Charlaine Harris, Edward, Emily Bronte, Georgie Nicholson, Louise Rennison, Sookie Stackhouse, Terry Pratchett, Tuesday Tomorrow, Twilight, Unseen Academicals, Wuthering Heights

Are These My Basoomas I See Before Me? by Louise Rennison
Published by: HarperCollins Childrens (Uk), HarperTeen (US)
Publication Date: June 2009 (UK), October 6th, 2009 (US)
Format: Hardcover, 288 Pages
Rating: ★★★
To Buy (UK)
To Preorder (US)

In the tenth and final installment of Louise Rennison's Georgia Nicholson series, Are These My Basoomas I See Before Me? Georgia is once again on the rack of luurve. I have always been a big supporter of these books with it's witty protagonist and inventive use of the English language, but, I am also glad to say the series has come it's end (in it's current incarnation). This last installment seemed a little stale. Georgia is once again trying to find where she stands with a Luurve God and with Dave the Laugh. But haven't we been here before? The jokes have been used one too many times and the situations are a little frayed around the edges. While we have been spending ten years reading the exploits of Georgie only two years have passed in her world. The lack of time is occasionally frustrating, because the first and second book were the only two with a distinct time lapse, the rest have been under a month! So while it seems Georgie has been on the rack for awhile, it's actually early days for her yet. But I did enjoy the fact that she seems to be gaining some maturiosity. She comes to realize that with a boyfriend like Masimo she doesn't have that much in common other than the snogging, so what do you do with a boyfriend like that? Well how about upgrade to a guy who is not only cute but funny, who you aren't nervous around and who you don't pretend to be someone you're not around and who likes you and thinks you're beautiful? Maybe Dave? We also get to see another hilarious Billy Shakespeare adaptation, this time Rom and Jul, with Georgia playing Merc-Lurk-io. Jas also becomes less of a spaz and tries to be a little less clingy when it comes to Tom. Also was there this much German in earlier books?

The one thought I have is, what would happen to Georgia later in life? While the current teen aspect has run its course what would happen if Louise Rennison decided to relaunch the series later in Georgia's life. This isn't a far fetched idea either. Adrian Mole by Sue Townsend was a huge success in the 80s and later she decided to continue his tale later in his life. He started out as 13 3/4s in 1983 but by 2004 he was 34. I personally think this would work for Georgia, plus she could give Bridget Jones a run for her money, especially seeing as they are making yet another film (why I ask, why!?! The second was awful and in my mind hurt the perfection of the original).

As a final note, I loved the Rowan Atkinson quote (I think it's from Blackadder, but I was also watching The Thin Blue Line recently, so one of those): "You wouldn't get it if it came in a large bag marked IT!"

Posted by Miss Eliza at 1:24 AM 0 comments  

Labels: Adrian Mole, Are These My Basoomas I See Before Me?, Blackadder, Book Review, Georgie Nicholson, Louise Rennison, Sue Townsend

Young Adult books, just by their name carry a stigma to some, but I say trash that, as my friend said over on her blog the other day, Ya for A! Young Adult books are no longer just for the teens, do not feel bad for looking at these books in the bookstore! With authors like Neil Gaiman stepping into this genre and winning the Newbury, you can see that these are books everyone should be reading (a note, a Newbury winner doesn't guarantee a good book, but pick up The Graveyard Book and you won't be let down). I personally believe that while Young Adult books have always been around and good it wasn't until Harry Potter came that J. K. Rowling was able to dent the preconceived notion of what defines childrens and what defines adult literature. She broke down the stereotypes to an extent, opening the flood gates to a whole new world of well written extremely successful Young Adult authors, from Shannon Hale, even to Stephenie Meyer.

Young Adult seems to be broken down into two categories. The first is the more true to life, or at least mildly realistic and more confessional books. These range from The Gossip Girl series, which can be over the top, some would say overly mature for their age bracket, to my favorite, the Georgie Nicholson books by Louise Rennison. I love the Georgie Nicholson books because they are quite literally if Bridget Jones had written books as a teenager. Georgie is very British, very funny and her, some would say, bastardization but I will say inventiveness, with the English language is priceless. (There is even a British to American, aka Hambuger-a-go-go-ese, dictionary.) Her tenth and final book is out this month in England, look for it stateside in the fall.

The second category is Science Fiction/Fantasy, where I usually dwell. In fact a lot of my favorite authors are considered part of this genre. I personally like Young Adult Sci Fi/Fantasy because unlike the adult books you don't get unnecessary graphic sex. I'm not a prude, but I think that the sex should be a part of the story and occur naturally, and not all be lesbian, I mean come on, not all women in this genre will go for other women if given the chance no matter what the typical fanfic and slash writers think. Even George R. R. Martin falls prey to this with some of his characters and I ask why? Young Adult writers are doing pretty good without it (aside from Stephenie Meyer) thank you!

So I suggest you go out to your local library or bookstore and spend some time in the Young Adult section. You might get some strange looks, but I guarantee you will find something you like, and maybe even something you love.

Authors I would strongly recommend:
Cornelia Funke - Her Inkworld series dealing with literally inhabiting books is wonderfully dark and very reminiscent of the Brothers Grimm. The first book, wrongly translated as Inkheart, it's real title is Inkblood, is the weakest, but the final two should not be missed.

Neil Gaiman - If you haven't read his teen books you are missing his best writing, check out Corlaine and The Graveyard Book.

Shannon Hale - Her books of Bayern, starting with a re-telling of the Brothers Grimm's Goose Girl are wonderful. Also recommended is her Book of a Thousand Days.

R. L. LaFevers - Her Theodosia Throckmorton books encompassing the world of Egyptology are fabulous. I'd especially recommend her for fans of Arthur Conan Doyle, The Mummy, or what it reminds me most of, the best movie ever, Young Sherlock Holmes!

Christopher Paolini - I love him, though most people say his fantasy about Dragons is just a mish-mash of other writers, I still love them, and find them better written than most.

Terry Pratchett - His Tiffany Aching series about a young witch brings back all the Discworld witches we know and love and uses them as background for a young witch in training. And the Nac Mac Feegles! Och Eye!

Louise Rennison - Bridget Jones if she was a slightly funnier and loonier teen.

Authors I would avoid:
C.S. Lewis - Narnia, yeah it's good for awhile, but it goes all religious weird and then he kills everybody! Except Susan, cause she likes make-up...personally I'd be siding with Susan if it meant I lived.

Stephenie Meyer - What started out as a good series with a chance to be different ended up showing us that even in a world of Vampires you need to have a man and a child to be complete.

Authors I have not made my mind up on:
Melissa Marr - I just started her Wicked Lovely series, and I like the dark fairies and the different courts, but it does have a boy that can sparkle...so it might be headed the way of Stephenie Meyer...

Posted by Miss Eliza at 12:14 AM 2 comments  

Labels: Christopher Paolini, Cornelia Funke, Georgie Nicholson, Gossip Girl, Louise Rennison, Neil Gaiman, Newbury, R. L. Lafevers, Shannon Hale, Stephenie Meyer, Terry Pratchett