strange and random happenstance

The House Guest by Mark Edwards
Published by: Thomas and Mercer
Publication Date: June 2nd, 2020
Format: Paperback, 302 Pages
To Buy

The official patter:
"A perfect summer. A perfect stranger. A perfect nightmare.

When British twenty-somethings Ruth and Adam are offered the chance to spend the summer housesitting in New York, they can't say no. Young, in love and on the cusp of professional success, they feel as if luck is finally on their side.

So the moment that Eden turns up on the doorstep, drenched from a summer storm, it seems only right to share a bit of that good fortune. Beautiful and charismatic, Eden claims to be a friend of the homeowners, who told her she could stay whenever she was in New York.

They know you're not supposed to talk to strangers - let alone invite them into your home - but after all, Eden's only a stranger until they get to know her.

As suspicions creep in that Eden may not be who she claims to be, they begin to wonder if they've made a terrible mistake...

The House Guest is the chilling new psychological thriller from the three million copy bestselling author of Here to Stay and Follow You Home."

Just the mere thought of a house guest right now makes me shudder! 

The Grim Reader by Kate Carlisle
Published by: Berkley
Publication Date: June 2nd, 2020
Format: Hardcover, 336 Pages
To Buy

The official patter:
"San Francisco book-restoration expert Brooklyn Wainwright was hoping for a fun, relaxing weekend at a local book fair, but a murderer made other plans in the latest in this New York Times bestselling series.

Brooklyn and her new hunky husband, Derek, are excited to be guests at Dharma’s first annual Book Festival. The entire town is involved and Brooklyn’s mom Rebecca is taking charge. In addition to all of her other event related duties, she’s got Brooklyn doing rare book appraisals and is also staging Little Women, the musical to delight the festival goers. If that wasn’t enough, she and Meg - Derek’s mom - will have a booth where they read palms and tarot cards.

Brooklyn couldn’t be prouder of her mom’s do-it-all attitude so when a greedy local businessman who seems intent on destroying Dharma starts harassing Rebecca, Brooklyn is ready to take him down. Rebecca is able to hold her own with the nasty jerk until one of her fellow festival committee members is brutally murdered and the money for the festival seems to have vanished into thin air. Things get even more personal when one of Brooklyn’s nearest and dearest is nearly run down in cold blood. Brooklyn and Derek go into attack mode and the pressure is on to catch a spineless killer before they find themselves skipping the festival for a funeral."

This series is always on my list because books and San Francisco, through in the Little Women musical and I am so ready!

The Rat Began to Gnaw the Rope by C.W. Grafton
Published by: Poisoned Pen Press
Publication Date: June 2nd, 2020
Format: Paperback, 304 Pages
To Buy

The official patter:
"Is this lawyer digging his way to the truth, or digging his own grave?

Short, chubby, and awkward with members of the opposite sex, Gil Henry is the youngest partner in a small law firm, not a hard-boiled sleuth. So when an attractive young woman named Ruth McClure walks into his office and asks him to investigate the value of the stock she inherited from her father, he thinks nothing of it - until someone makes an attempt on his life.

Soon Gil is inadvertently embroiled in scandal, subterfuge, and murder. He's beaten, shot, and stabbed, as his colleagues and enemies try to stop him from seeing the case through to the end. Surrounded by adversaries, he teams up with Ruth and her secretive brother to find answers to the questions someone desperately wants to keep him from asking.

In this portrait of America on the eve of America's entry into World War II, C.W. Grafton - himself a lawyer and the father of prolific mystery writer Sue Grafton - pens an award-winning mystery that combines humor and the hard-boiled style and will keep readers guessing until its thrilling conclusion."

I LOVE that Poisoned Pen Press and the Library of Congress are doing this series, but more importantly, did you know that Sue Grafton's father wrote an award-winning mystery!?! Talent runs in that family, that's for sure!

Murder on a Mississippi Steamboat by Leighann Dobbs
Published by: Bookouture
Publication Date: June 2nd, 2020
Format: Paperback, 176 Pages
To Buy

The official patter:
"Nora elbowed her way up to the railing and looked down. The paddle wheel was making its last turn, dredging up a mass of turquoise chiffon made almost transparent by the water. A hand, its red lacquered fingernails a contrast to the pale white skin, stuck up from a bejeweled cuff...

A relaxing cruise down the Mississippi on the Miss Delta Belle steamboat turns to tragedy when celebrity Delilah Dove falls from the deck and is swallowed by the river faster than you can say 'man overboard '

It's touted as a tragic accident, but guests Miss Nora Marsh and her wily great-aunt Julia know a murder when they see one. Can they get justice for Delilah and crack the case without alerting the murderer to their suspicions?

As Nora and Julia hunt for clues it emerges that nearly everyone had a reason to want Delilah dead. And that's bad news for the two sleuths - who want to solve the case pronto, before Mississippi police chief and Aunt Julia's nemesis Artemis Leonard comes on board at the next port to launch the official investigation. She's not letting him get the credit if she can help it.

With multiple suspects and a series of mysterious thefts onboard - not to mention the distractingly handsome Max Lawton turning Nora's head - this is shaping up to be one tough case to crack. What started as a gentle river voyage is far from plain sailing.

A gripping and witty 1920s murder mystery from bestselling author Leighann Dobbs, perfect for fans of T E Kinsey and Lee Strauss."

I am ALL about the 1920s right now!

My Calamity Jane by Cynthia Hand, Brodi Ashton, and Jodi Meadow
Published by: HarperTeen
Publication Date: June 2nd, 2020
Format: Hardcover, 544 Pages
To Buy

The official patter:
"Hold on to your hats: The authors who brought you the New York Times bestseller My Plain Jane, which Booklist praised as “delightfully deadpan” (starred review) and Publishers Weekly called “a clever, romantic farce” (starred review), are back with another irreverent historical adventure.

Welcome to 1876 America, a place bursting with gunslingers, outlaws, and garou - better known as werewolves.

And where there are garou, there’re hunters: the one and only Calamity Jane, to be precise, along with her fellow stars of Wild Bill’s Traveling Show, Annie Oakley and Frank “the Pistol Prince” Butler.

After a garou hunt goes south and Jane finds a suspicious-like bite on her arm, she turns tail for Deadwood, where there’s talk of a garou cure. But rumors can be deceiving - meaning the gang better hightail it after her before they’re a day late and a Jane short.

In this perfect next read for fans of A Gentleman’s Guide to Vice and Virtue, bestselling authors Cynthia Hand, Jodi Meadows, and Brodi Ashton bring their signature spark to the side-splittin’, whopper-filled (but actually kind of factual?) tale of Calamity Jane."

Anyone else obsessed with Calamity Jane since they first watched Deadwood?

The Obsidian Tower by Melissa Caruso
Published by: Orbit
Publication Date: June 2nd, 2020
Format: Paperback, 528 Pages
To Buy

The official patter:
"One woman will either save an entire continent or completely destroy it in a captivating epic fantasy bursting with intrigue and ambition, questioned loyalties, and broken magic.

"Guard the tower, ward the stone. Find your answers writ in bone. Keep your trust through wits or war - nothing must unseal the door."

Deep within Gloamingard Castle lies a black tower. Sealed by magic, it guards a dangerous secret that has been contained for thousands of years.

As Warden, Ryxander knows the warning passed down through generations: nothing must unreal the Door. But one impetuous decision will leave her with blood on her hands - and unleash a threat that could doom the world to fall to darkness."

Anyone else get actual goosebumps reading that rhyme?

Heroes by Stephen Fry
Published by: Chronicle Books
Publication Date: June 2nd, 2020
Format: Hardcover, 352 Pages
To Buy

The official patter:
"In this sequel to the bestselling Mythos, legendary author and actor Stephen Fry moves from the exploits of the Olympian gods to the deeds of mortal heroes.

Perseus. Jason. Atalanta. Theseus. Heracles. Rediscover the thrills, grandeur, and unabashed fun of the Greek myths. Whether recounting a tender love affair or a heroic triumph, Fry deftly finds resonance with our own modern minds and hearts.

Illustrated throughout with classical art inspired by the myths, this gorgeous volume invites you to explore a captivating world with a brilliant storyteller as your guide.

In Heroes, Fry draws out the humor and pathos in both tender love affairs and heroic battles, and reveals each myth's relevance for our own time."

Stephen Fry. That is all. 

Little Book of Kindness by Francesca Pirrone
Published by: Clavis
Publication Date: June 2nd, 2020
Format: Hardcover, 50 Pages
To Buy

The official patter:
"It's easy to be kind. Offer a smile. Say thank you. Lend a helping hand. You'll see that when you are kind, others are kind too."

We could all do with a little more kindness these days. 

I Left the House Today! by Cassandra Calin
Published by: Andrews McMeel Publishing
Publication Date: June 2nd, 2020
Format: Paperback, 144 Pages
To Buy

The official patter:
"Hilarious and relatable comics about one young woman's life, relationships, and day-to-day humorous musings on why it's good to leave the house sometimes - and when it's better to stay home.

Cassandra Calin’s ability to document the hilarity of relatable everyday events in a series of webcomics has generated a huge following on social media. This beautifully illustrated compendium of first-person comics about the trials of the single life, school, stress, junk food, shaving, and maintaining a healthy self-image. Cassandra Calin's comics frequently highlight the humorous gap between expectations and reality, especially when it comes to appearance and how much she can accomplish in one day. This book is funny, lighthearted, introspective, and artistically stunning - the perfect gift for young women, recent graduates, and anyone who might need a little comedic incentive to leave the house today."

If you were able to leave the house today without losing it, I applaud you!

Posted by Miss Eliza at 12:00 AM 0 comments  

Labels: 1920s, C.W. Grafton, Calamity Jane, Cassandra Calin, Deadwood, Francesca Pirrone, Greek, Kate Carlisle, Leighann Dobbs, Library of Congress, Mark Edwards, Melissa Caruso, San Francisco, Stephen Fry, The House Guest

The Bridal Strain: Emily and Colin's Wedding by Tasha Alexander
Published by: Tasha Alexander
Publication Date: 2009
Format: Kindle
Rating: ★★★★★
To Buy

After much temptation, much heartache, and much delay, Colin has decided that he can no longer wait to be married to Emily, his future mother-in-law and Queen Victoria be damned. So drenched to the bone high above the caldera on Santorini he proposes that he and Emily be married that very night and Emily agrees. Though Emily is swept away by the romantic gesture, not thinking of the practicalities of showing up at the church soaking wet and demanding to be wed, she is thankfully marrying a very organized man capable of pulling off the most elaborate of missions for the crown with the simplest of ease. So when they return to her villa she shouldn't be surprised that preparations are underway for a full wedding celebration, and yet she is. She's surprised and touched. The entire village has come together to see her and Colin wed. But that won't be the only surprise of the evening, as Emily's dearest friend Cecile is also on hand, there to celebrate the nuptials, but also there to provide emotional support while mourning such a handsome man leaving the marriage market. Though Cecile wouldn't let Emily marry unless the man was worry of her, luckily for Colin he is. And so, their married life begins.

So much of the first two books in Tasha's Lady Emily series is the will-they-won't-they of Emily and Colin. This isn't just played for romantic tension, though one can't deny that it is titillating, but it's practical. Emily, as a widow, has so much freedom that she has to be certain of Colin in order to be willing to shackle herself into another marriage where to the majority of Victorian society she would be nothing but a possession, and viewed, in the extreme, as a slave. But thankfully Colin loves her not as the ideal her first husband Philip viewed her as, but as this intelligent woman willing to fight at his side, not sit home and be content as the typical wife would in raising her brood. He loves her for what she has become, what she has evolved into, and that's why their relationship is so epic and why it would have been a shame not to see their wedding day. To be there as they became one, but still stayed themselves. Colin's wedding gift to Emily, of a gorgeous Greek vase, shows that he loves her for who she is and he will never force her into a mold labelled "Standard Victorian Wife." Though Tasha's extras are interesting in that it sheds light on the fact that what we view as the "Victorian Standard" isn't truth. Not everything is as it seems, Victorians were far more liberal, and there were quite a few pregnant women walking down the aisle...

Posted by Miss Eliza at 12:00 AM 0 comments  

Labels: Alexander Autumn, Colin Hargreaves, Emily and Colin's Wedding, Freedom, Greek, Kindle, Lady Emily, Revisionist History, Santorini, Short Story, Tasha Alexander, The Bridal Strain, Victorian, Weddings

And Only to Deceive by Tasha Alexander
Published by: Harper
Publication Date: 2005
Format: Paperback, 321 Pages
Rating: ★★★★★
To Buy

Lady Emily is the widow of the Viscount Philip of Ashton, the husband everyone wanted. It was a very convenient marriage all around. Emily needed to get away from her domineering mother and Philip had the credentials to appease said mother and viewed Emily as the apex of beauty, his Kallista. So he asked for Emily's hand and was accepted and promptly went off to Africa and died, leaving her comfortable and independent. Who could ask for anything more? But now Emily is ready to shed her mourning after two long years sequestered away from society. What little society she has been allowed consists of her best friend Ivy, or friends of her husband, like Colin Hargreaves, or her mother. Who is trying to convince her that she should marry. AGAIN! Didn't the marriage to Philip count? Sure he died and they had no children, but the statues she attained should be enough to keep her mother at bay for at least one lifetime. Being a widow is liberating! Why would Emily give that up to be the property of another man she barely knows?

Emily's removal from society has made her realize she can do whatever she wants under the guise of trauma. She can sit in her husband's study and drink port and learn Greek and go to the museum and forge a life for herself that doesn't require a man! Yet she finds, to her astonishment, that her husband was really a fascinating man. A true scholar with a mind teaming with knowledge and a love of art. A man who truly loved her and whom she just thought of as a way out of an intolerable situation. He loved her, yet she didn't love him... then. Following in his steps, learning about his interests and passions, she slowly starts to fall for her dead husband. If only her husband where still alive, think of the conversations they could have because of the new learned woman she has become thanks to the position he gave her. But if, by some miracle, he did return, would he approve of the woman she's become? Would she be willing to accept his flaws, even if they are illegal? But most importantly, how would he view her bevy of suitors?

With Emily and Philip you have a truly interesting love story. Not the typical boy meets girl and then after some problems, they live happily ever after with Emily's mom being a good foil during their courtship. Here we have boy meets girl, they marry, girl loses boy and years later falls in love with who she thinks he might have been. We get to experience all the joys and sorrows of two people falling in love, but simultaneously know that it is doomed. Philip was in love with a woman he put on a pedestal and literally made his goddess, Kallista, and Emily fell in love with a past that never was. Yet Tasha strings us along, making us see the romantic what ifs without initially focusing on what the truth of their relationship would have been given societal constraints. Leading you on, building this epic and tragic love story that you are so completely committed to you totally ignore the fact that it would never work. I was hoping against hope that by some miracle Philip would be alive and that these two crazy kids would make their relationship work.

But the realist in me knew it wasn't to be, and the doubt even seeps into the cracks Emily has been ignoring. The fact that her husband might have been morally dubious is just a catalyst for her to actually look at the reality of her situation. Philip never knew Emily. He saw her as this beautiful creature, renaming her Kallista to be his romantic ideal. He loved the idea of her, much like he loved his art. She's a statue of loveliness to him. But could he love this statue if it came to life? After his death she changed, she became self-reliant, knowledgeable, all the things Victorian women weren't supposed to be. I don't think Philip would be able to rectify his image of her with the learned woman she has become, much less Emily being able to rectify the scholar of her imagination with the big game hunter he was. If he had never gone and died in Africa he'd expect Emily to be a typical Victorian wife. Seen, not heard. Beautiful and his most prized possession. Because two people can easily be desperately in love with each other when they have no idea who the other person is.

While much of the book deals with the heartbreak of falling for someone after they're gone, there is other, more familiar DNA that Tasha mines for Emily's other suitors. I can not but agree with the spot on quote on the back of my paperback edition that says "[h]ad Jane Austen written The Da Vinci Code, she may well have come up with this elegant novel." It's not just the secrets of antiquities that bring to mind Dan Brown's bestseller, or the effortless writing reminiscent of Austen that makes it feel like this book sprang fully formed from Tasha's head like Athena did from Zeus's, but Philip's two friends who are vying for Emily's heart. Or at least her hand. On the one hand we have Colin Hargreaves, with the wavy hair and stoic demeanor of a 1996 Colin Firth, he's a bit of a mystery, but Philip trusted him and therefore Emily does, to an extent. On the other hand we have Andrew Palmer, a delightful conversationalist, a bit of a gossip, and a total flirt, but such a hansom flirt. Yes folks, it's the Pride and Prejudice of it all with Colin being our Darcy and Andrew being our Wickham.

And much like Austen's classic, "[o]ne has got all the goodness, and the other all the appearance of it.'' There's a reason Austen tropes work, they are classic. Which is why there are countless retellings and reimaginings, but Tasha does all those read-a-likes one better, because this love triangle isn't the crux of the book. She takes one of the most famous plots ever written and makes it a subplot. She's not out to rewrite Pride and Prejudice, she's out to write her own story, create her own legacy. This book is about lost love, art theft, forgeries, antiquities, education, societal constraints, with a little Jane Austen thrown in. This is why I'm almost of the mind to just delete this paragraphs I've just labored over because while there is this kernel of Austen by just saying that people are going to have certain expectations. They're going to think it's Victorian Bridget Jones or some such nonsense that is in no way what this book is. This is the problem of being a reviewer, you can see what it's like but also what it is on it's own and my purpose in writing this review is not only to discuss my feelings of what I've read but to get you to pick up this book. PICK IT UP! Just go in without preconceptions.

Because this book literally has so much fun twisting and turning what you'd expect from this time period. While Tasha has today's sensibilities she clearly states in her afterward that she wrote it from the point of view of Victorian society, and then as a reader you take great joy as she finds all the loopholes and makes something that is both of it's time and of our time. What I took great glee in was all the art in the book, from classic Greek statuary and vases to the Impressionists working in Paris while Emily was there. While today we view the Impressionists as the greatest artists of that time, at the time they were frowned upon. I felt like for once all those art history classes I took were paying off! But more than that it's the counterpoint of a woman's life proscribed by Victorian mourning with that of the artistic scene in Paris at the end of the 1800s. Constriction versus liberation. Which is very much a theme throughout the book. While Emily is under so many strictures, at the same time she is given a liberty by her status that would never have been conferred on her had Philip survived. Being a widow of means is literally the only way women could have freedom in the Victorian era. To see Emily embrace all that that means is the greatest of joys. It makes you realize how much better we have it and that we need to embrace all that we have because we could have it far worse.

Posted by Miss Eliza at 12:00 AM 0 comments  

Labels: Alexander Autumn, And Only to Deceive, Colin Firth, Colin Hargreaves, Darcy, Greek, Jane Austen, Lady Emily, Pride and Prejudice, Tasha Alexander, The Da Vinci Code, The Impressionists, Victorian, Wickham, Widow

Middlesex by Jeffrey Eugenides
Published by: Picador USA
Publication Date: 2002
Format: Paperback, 529 Pages
Rating: ★★
To Buy
Cal was born Callie. There was no surgery, there was no accident. There was just a fluke of genes and a lack of knowledge. Cal tells us his story. The journey from female to male. The fact that being a hermaphrodite, while he has male genes, being raised female, has influenced him greatly, but not as greatly as he told the eminent Dr. Luce. Yet, to tell his tale, we must travel back in time. How was he formed? What where the confluence of genes that led to him. Desdemona and her brother Lefty, his paternal grandparents. They fled Greece in the onslaught of the Turkish. They also fled the fact that they where siblings, as well as third cousins. It was a very small village they came from, a village where sometimes, babies where born who where neither one thing or another.

Resettling in Detroit, they started a new life with their cousin Lina and her husband of convenience Zizmo. Lina likes the girls rather more than the boys, so is quite shocked when she and Desdemona both become pregnant, damn that arousing play they went to see. These two children will one day be Cal's parents. Spanning generations, the book shows how hard it is to live between two worlds. Male and female, Greek and American, child and adult. Is it genes that make us, environment, or something else entirely? Is it our choice?

I can see why this book won the Pulitzer. It's really well written, thought provoking, and an interesting and daring subject (hello again incest! You thought I was going to say hermaphrodite didn't you?), and literally made for book club dissection, which I will be doing. Yet, while enjoying the read, I never really felt that invested in the book or that enamoured of the characters. Middlesex is really at least six books in one; memoir, historical fiction, romance, coming of age, disillusioned youth, drifter in the vein of Holden Caulfield, and finally a weird John Waters Midnight Cowboy camp mash-up worthy of David Lynch.

The generational structure, which was necessary, because it showed how Callie became Cal, had the downside of me growing to really care about a character only to have Eugenides speed up the narrative and push them aside for the newer character to take the stage. He also had the tendency to not only marginalize the previous characters, but to demonize them in some fashion. Lefty and Desdemona's taboo love was turned sour, Milton and Tessie and their budding romance, turned into upper middle class boredom. While it shows that, indeed, life goes on and changes, it changed my feelings so much over the course of the narrative, that I began to marginalize the characters in my own mind before the author did it for me. We even seemed to be in sync when Dr. Luce came around, because after all that build up, he was there marginally for two weeks and then gone. With trying to cover so much historical ground, I hate to say this because I felt this book was overly long anyway and spent most of it's time stringing us along, but he should have made it an even bigger epic, so that the rush to end a tale and begin another tale was omitted and we could still care for those we had been previously reading about. Shift the focus, don't eliminate the previous characters as much. And don't put Desdemona in the guest house and only remember her after 100 pages to add a nice cyclical feeling at the end.

Other things that bothered me where quite nit-picky. Sometimes the language was overly written, this superfluous verbosity made me want to smack Eugenides from time to time, just as you probably wanted to do to me for using the phrase superfluous verbosity. This tendency in fact reminded me very much of Michael Chabon's The Final Solution, wherein I felt that Chabon wrote the book with a thesaurus full of obscure words just to drive me slightly insane. While Eugenides doesn't reach Cabon's heights of undesirable loquaciousness, he did have me shaking my fist and looking for a dictionary every once in a while.

Eugenides has a deft hand for humor, often leading to me laughing out loud, but occasionally he took the humor too far and it became a parody that didn't work. For example, the midnight car chase, started out funny, with it basically being the most sedate car chase ever, but then, it went over the top, and almost became a scene from one of Matt Damon's Bourne movies, but with an odd out-of-body coda. This, this was too much. As was the peep show in San Francisco. I'm not saying that this didn't work, I'm saying, it was more John Waters or David Lynch than any other part of the book and therefore did not feel like it was a part of this book.

String us along for hundreds of pages, at least Eugenides delivered where it mattered most. Callie. While parts of "her" own story I didn't like, such as the lecherous older men when she was younger and her slightly pervy brother, once she became a teenager the book soared. All teenagers have the feeling that something is wrong with them, that they are different. While, with Callie, this is indeed the case, it was still a struggle anyone can identify with, we didn't all start out as adults. The feelings for the Obscure Object, could be any crush or first love. But what I was really struck by was how well a male writer could capture the beginning of womanhood, to use a cliched phrase. All girls go through the waiting game of when they will start to develop. When will they need a bra, when can they start shaving, when do they need deodorant. When will they start to menstruate. In Callie's case, it is a futile waiting game, yet it's the fact that "she" doesn't know that it's futile like we readers do, that makes it that much more poignant. For me it recaptured that time in my life. I felt all these emotions that I had forgotten about all over again. For me it took me back to the summer of 1991 and how my golden birthday was ruined by the arrival of the bane of womanhood. Yet this book made me grateful. Made me realize how lucky I was. Middlesex cast a golden light on my own development and made me happy that I could re-experience that time in my life. Recapture the uncertainty and, like Callie when she becomes Cal, know the feeling of what it's like to realize who you are and start on the path to becoming who you will be.

Posted by Miss Eliza at 12:00 AM 0 comments  

Labels: David Lynch, Detroit, Greek, Hermaphrodite, Holden Caulfield, Jeffrey Eugenides, John Waters, Matt Damon, Michael Chabon, Middlesex, Midnight Cowboy, Puberty, Pulitzer, The Final Solution

The Secret History by Donna Tratt
Published by: Vintatge
Publication Date: 1992
Format: Paperback, 559 Pages
Rating: ★
To Buy
Richard arrives at Hampen College in New England because it's the only school that will take him in and give him some money. It's an eccentric little school and Richard doesn't quite know what he will study. Having studied Greek back in California, he is drawn to this elite circle that has formed around Julian, a professor who holds his classes in his office as a kind of salon, wherein he shall be your sole educator, in the vein of true classicism. Once Richard finally finagles his way in, he becomes a part of this eccentric circle consisting of Henry, the nominal leader, Francis, the literary closet gay, Bunny, the rather dimwitted leach, and Charles and Camilla, the down at heels twins. They are his life entire. Every moment is spent with them or thinking of them. Yet there are secrets. One secret will tear them apart from within. Because, what if, in the pursuit of knowledge, to experience all the Greeks did, a ceremony was performed. A ceremony that had unintended consequences. A ceremony that will fracture the group. A ceremony that was evil and will leave evil in it's wake.

This book reaches the lofty position of one of the worst books I've read in a long time, not just because of the glacial pacing and the unlikable characters, but because of two majorly flaws. There is a disconnect in the book between what it is and what it wants to be. This dislocation gives the book a jarring feeling, like trying to force a square peg in a round hole. The book felt so not of it's time. There is a timelessness to it that feels routed in the early half of the 20th century. You feel like you could be at a small sequestered college surrounded by autumnal foliage and the cast of Brideshead Revisited would wander around the corner. But a coke addict with a boom box is what you usually get. This book is shockingly in the 80s. It doesn't feel like the 80s. The little quiet and queer Greek scholars feel of another time. Which I guess might have been Donna Tartt's purpose... but if it was, it failed. Every time something "80s" happened it felt like an anachronism. A splash of cold water in the face that made me think for the 100th time, why am I still reading this book.

The disconnect isn't just a temporal one, but one of character. Bunny has purposely conflicting descriptions. He is young, very clothes conscious, is a skinflint, so your mind starts to build this very wane, dapper man, who might be slightly effeminate. A Sebastian Flyte of the 80s if you would. For chapters you have this image, and it builds, and gains force, this is who Bunny is. With a name like Bunny, how could you not get this image. Yet then Tartt contradicts this all with, no, he's a good old boy who's a homophobe that is very muscularly built with a fondness for sports. Say what!?! The name Bunny was ironic? You let me believe this image for hundreds of pages to then throw in a curve and make this character no longer work for me. People are built of contradictions, this is true. Yet why go out of the way to obviously create all these Brideshead references, with Venice and Bunny and what have you, only to go, fooled you. Rule one of writing, you don't alienate your reader. They'll get snarky, they'll write crap reviews, and they will never buy your books again, and what will you do without an income?

The second problem I had was with the issue they had of what to do with Bunny. Kill him, move on, the end, I just cut your book by 400 pages Donna. Because that is the evil that comes of their ceremony, Bunny becomes a blackmailer. These people don't have morals, we've already seen that. Incest, it's ok, in fact, it's kind of sexy. Being bisexual with friends occasionally, that's fine too. Heavy drug use, alcohol abuse, Bacchanalia's, murder, they've done it all. Yet they hesitate to kill the one person who they loath, who is blackmailing them, and who was never much of a friend. Uh... where did the sudden morals come from? Perhaps because Donna Tartt was being paid by the word and the longer she could stretch out this anguish, this pointless debate about the inevitable, the more healthy her check at the end.

I didn't know what to expect going into this book. I had heard so many things about it. I had some sort of vague idea that this was going to be an intriguing mystery about some horrific crime, something "beyond the boundaries of normal morality". Instead I got 500 plus pages of whiny eccentric Greek scholars dithering about the inevitable and revelling in debauchery in such a boring way, it didn't feel debauched. The only mystery this book offered was of it's laudatory nature. Please, why? I agree with another review I read, I resent the time I spent on this book. Next please?

Posted by Miss Eliza at 12:00 AM 0 comments  

Labels: Brideshead Revisited, Bunny, Donna Tartt, Greek, Sebastian Flyte, The Secret History of the Pink Carnation, Venice