Dune: Prophecy
I get it, you haven't tried this show because you're intimidated. The lore of Dune is overwhelming. You went to a bookstore once and were like, I think I'd like to read Dune, you picked up the book, which is already pretty thick, you saw how tiny the print was and thought, I'll just watch Chalamet and Zendaya. Then you watched the Denis Villeneuve films and enjoyed them. Obviously the first part is way better than the second in spite of the infrared scene, but again, going further into this world is daunting and Austin Butler is dead. I am here to allay you fears. First, Dune: Prophecy is set about ten thousand years before the time of Paul Atreides. What does this mean? You don't need to know anything from the movies. I mean, obviously if you were paying attention the fact that technology has stagnated over a ten thousand year time period is fascinating with the ouster of "thinking machines" but seriously, you don't need to go that deep. That's for the uber nerds. This show works on many levels and even at the simplest level it is a stunning tale of court intrigue. You have three houses that are vying for dominance, the same three houses that the films concern; House Harkonnen, House Atreides, and House Corrino. Then there's the Bene Gesserit, a religious order of women who wants control more than the Houses and are willing to work in the shadows in secret and as advisors to steer the Imperium and control the galaxy. This is all neatly summarized at the beginning of the show, but again, you don't need to be in the weeds to enjoy this, because this could be any court scandal. Who has power, and who wants power, and who is willing to manipulate the universe to get it and who wants to upset the status quo and wrest control from those in power. Meaning, this isn't confusing at all, Dune: Prophecy tells a tale simply and well. Plus we have stunning costumes and actors drawn oddly from the stable of British actors who have appeared on The Witcher. Perhaps they have a love of court intrigue with an otherworldly aspect? I mean, obviously the draw is Oscar nominee Emily Watson, but there are so many British actors I love, especially the young actress from Steven Knight's Great Expectations, not the older Estella who is ironically also in this, but the younger one, Chloe Lea. But the standout is Travis Fimmel as Desmond Hart. So Desmond Hart is that figure that any fan of court intrigue roots for, the lightning rod who appears out of nowhere and changes history, usually not for the better. They are a shit stirrer. What we have here is literally Grigori Rasputin showing up in the Imperial Court of Russia and fucking everything up. Oh, the doomed angst ridden Russian vibe of this show is so me. I love everything about it. Rasputin is such a fascinating historical figure, so full of contradictions yet with a magnetic pull that draws you in as you are simultaneously revolted. That is how I feel about Desmond Hart. He has that otherworldly aspect that you can't turn away from. Plus the way his story ties back into the Bene Gesserit. Oh, how I wish I could watch this show all over again without knowing anything about it. And as for the touches of Mary Shelley? That's just like the cherry on top of the cake. I can't wait for more. It just proves you can have your cake and eat it too. Though here it would probably be spice cake.
What did I know about The Witcher prior to Netflix's announcement that they were making a TV show? That it was a popular video game. What did I know about The Witcher after Netflix's announcement that they were making a TV Show? That it was a popular video game, there were also books, and Henry Cavill was going to play the lead and was a big fan. The thing about the show is it's actually hard to get into. The first season has I don't know how many timelines and tries to impart the mythology of the world via osmosis. This is not a method I would recommend to anyone trying to impart large chunks of knowledge. It's very confusing. Even to those who are rewatching, so say my friends. I'm not the biggest fan of the info dump, but I wouldn't object too strongly in this instance. In fact I think I might have learned more from The Witcher: Blood Origin about the mythology and history of the Continent than I did from the main show. This all led me to prefer the one-off episodes. Sure, they were mainly monster of the week episodes, but if anyone says anything bad about the creepy incest episode "Betrayer Moon" or the just insane reimagining of Beauty and the Beast "A Grain of Truth" I will fight you. Once I get my hands on a Witcher potion. The thing you have to understand about The Witcher, from what I can see, it doesn't really have any pretensions to be something it's not. It's not trying to be something more like The Rings of Power, it's just trying to be itself, which is Xena: Warrior Princess with an actual budget. You even get the off-the-wall cameos like Molesley from Downton Abbey to Simon Callow who wandered by for two episodes as an eccentric bookseller with a rather fiery end, to Graham McTavish obviously playing the role Simon Callow wanted, nudist talking to owls. In other words all I'm asking for is a Bruce Campbell cameo. Hell, I'd even watch Bruce as Geralt more than I'd watch the least Hemsworth brother take on the role. And serious question, do we think this is a option? Because I am not joking about preferring a Bruce Campbell version seeing as there's no way in hell I'm watching one with that Hemsworth on board. So in a moment of clarity, I will confess that this review is for the final season of The Witcher. Let's face it, it's how we all feel. I even wonder if Netflix feels the same way, there was an odd survey they had me fill out back in July... And given the way it ended, I don't know if I want to give them a second chance. The first half of this season was oddly informative and didn't confuse me in the least, except for the part where like no one told Ciri her father is alive. It's like they realized from The Witcher: Blood Origin that an audience wants a comprehensible story. They also got the memo that Jaskier should be in every episode AND have an adorable love interest AND a rival, bringing on a marvelous bard who so breaks the forth wall. But then "The Witcher Red Wedding" happened. And while it was magnificent, the writers forgot that in the world of Game of Thrones that the "Red Wedding" was quickly followed by the even more spectacular "Purple Wedding." Here we got a grumbling deathbed Geralt and a vision quest Ciri. Oh, and no resolution. Don't forget the fact that they wasted their last three episodes and in particular their final episode on nothing. What a waste of a Witcher. I think that should be one of Jaskier's final songs.
