strange and random happenstance: Miriam Margolyes

Oh Miriam! by Miriam Margolyes
Published by: John Murray Publishers
Publication Date: January 2nd, 2024
Format: Hardcover, 336 Pages
To Buy

The official patter:
"From declaring my love to Vanessa Redgrave to being fed cockroaches by Steve Buscemi, from turnip-based comedy with Blackadder to being farted on by Arnold Schwarzenegger, from Graham Norton's sofa to Alan Cumming's camper van, my life has been (and continues to be) an uproarious adventure.

Oh Miriam! has been such a constant refrain in my life, said in all kinds of tones - laughs, surprised gasps and orgasmic sighs (I'm hoping for all of those from you as you read on!) - that it had to be the title of this book. And with a cast list that stretches from Churchill to DiCaprio, Dahl to Dietrich, Princess Margaret to Maggie Smith, I've so much more to tell you and so much more to say.

My chapters range from 'How to Stay Married' to 'Don't Let the Bastards Get You Down'. Discover how to break the thickest conversational ice; why swearing is actually good for you (though not on the Today programme); the unexpected things I learned at school and what my Spice Girl name would be. Not to mention my Tale of the Unexpected and my very own Vagina Monologue.

Buckle up and join me on another unforgettable adventure, but this time through my heart and head..."

Damn I love Miriam Margolyes. And yes, I organized this post based on how amused I would be if the titles of the books were chapter titles in her book.

That Time I Got Drunk and Saved a Demon by Kimberly Lemming
Published by: Orbit
Publication Date: January 2nd, 2024
Format: Paperback, 288 Pages
To Buy

The official patter:
"Spice trader Cinnamon's quiet life is turned upside down when she ends up on a quest with a fiery demon, in this irreverently quirky rom-com fantasy that is sweet, steamy, and funny as hell.

All she wanted to do was live her life in peace - maybe get a cat, expand the family spice farm. Really, anything that didn't involve going on an adventure where an orc might rip her face off. But they say the goddess has favorites, and if so, Cin is clearly not one of them.

After Cin saves the demon Fallon in a wine-drunk stupor, Fallon reveals that all he really wants to do is kill an evil witch enslaving his people. And who can blame him? But now he's dragging Cinnamon along for the ride whether she like it or not. On the bright side, at least he keeps burning off his shirt...."

I mean, who wouldn't want to read this book? A hot demon that can burn off his shirt?

Barbarian's Touch by Ruby Dixon
Published by: Berkley Books
Publication Date: January 2nd, 2024
Format: Paperback, 352 Pages
To Buy

The official patter:
"The next novel in the Ice Planet Barbarians series, an international publishing phenomenon - now in a special print edition with a bonus new epilogue!

Lila has never been more frightened in her life, but when Rokan appears, everything changes.

When I wake up on the ice planet, I'm scared of everything: This place is cold, silent, and the locals look more like blue devils than aliens. To make matters worse, one of the strangers decides I'm going to be his girlfriend and kidnaps me away from my sister. I'm completely and utterly alone. What's a girl to do?

Well, this girl escapes.

Of course, that means I go from the frying pan into the fire, and my situation gets even more dangerous. Just when I have no hope left, a new hero shows up. Sure, he's blue, horned, and has a tail. He's also fierce, protective, makes me purr...and thinks I'm perfect.

But is what we have real or just a mating instinct?"

Anyone else think the art of Lila on the cover looks like the British actress Lucy Griffiths?

Heartless by H.G. Parry
Published by: Subterranean Press
Publication Date: January 2nd, 2024
Format: Hardcover, 144 Pages
To Buy

The official patter:
"At the age of seven, in a London workhouse, newly-orphaned James meets ten-year-old Peter. Mysterious, mercurial, thoughtless to the point of cruelty, Peter nonetheless takes a liking to James. The two forge a strange friendship, bound together by their shared love of stories - stories of a magical island called Neverland, where they adventure as the pirate James Hook and the child-king Peter Pan. But one fateful night, Peter vanishes from his bed, and in the morning James is found lying alone and broken in the courtyard outside. Only James saw Peter fly from the workhouse roof in pursuit of a star, and nobody but James believes that the star was a fairy. Over twenty years later, on the deck of a whaling ship in the frozen wastes of the Arctic, First Mate James Hook sees the same star again. James's obsession with finding his childhood friend will lead him to mutiny and murder, beyond the edges of the world, and finally to an island that shouldn't exist. But neither Neverland nor Peter are what they appear. A new story is about to begin, and not all stories have happy endings."

I will literally read anything put out by Subterranean Press, but the fact that it's written by H.G. Parry and is a retelling of Peter Pan, I have to read it now.

Garth Marenghi's TerrorTome by Garth Marenghi
Published by: Coronet Books (GB)
Publication Date: January 2nd, 2024
Format: Paperbacks, 304 Pages
To Buy

The official patter:
"Dare you crack open the TerrorTome? (Mind the spine.)

When horror writer Nick Steen gets sucked into a cursed typewriter by the terrifying Type-Face, Dark Lord of the Prolix, the hellish visions inside his head are unleashed for real. Forced to fight his escaping imagination - now leaking out of his own brain - Nick must defend the town of Stalkford from his own fictional horrors, including avascular-necrosis-obsessed serial killer Nelson Strain and Nick's dreaded throppleganger, the Dark Third. Can he and Roz, his frequently incorrect female editor, hunt down these incarnate denizens of Nick's rampaging imaginata before they destroy Stalkford, outer Stalkford and possibly slightly further?

From the twisted genius of horror master Garth Marenghi - Frighternerman, Darkscribe, Doomsage (plus Man-Shee) - come three dark tales from his long-lost multi-volume epic: TerrorTome.

Can a brain leak?

(Yes, it can)"

If you know, you know. Also, if you know you are totally confused.

Rabbit Hole by Kate Brody
Published by: Soho Crime
Publication Date: January 2nd, 2024
Format: Hardcover, 384 Pages
To Buy

The official patter:
"A twisty, sexy debut exploring the dark side of true crime fandom and the blurry lines of female friendship, perfect for fans of Gillian Flynn, My Favorite Murder, and Fleabag.

Conspiracy theories from Reddit seduce a disaster-prone woman into an obsession with solving her older sister's cold-case disappearance.

Ten years ago, Theodora "Teddy" Angstrom's older sister, Angie, went missing. Her case remains unsolved. Now Teddy's father, Mark, has killed himself. Unbeknownst to Mark's family, he had been active in a Reddit community fixated on Angie, and Teddy can't help but fall down the same rabbit hole.

Teddy's investigation quickly gets her in hot water with her gun-nut boyfriend, her long-lost half brother, and her colleagues at the prestigious high school where she teaches English. Further complicating matters is Teddy's growing obsession with Mickey, a charming amateur sleuth who is eerily keen on helping her solve the case.

Bewitched by Mickey, Teddy begins to lose her moral compass. As she struggles to reconcile new information with old memories, her erratic behavior reaches a fever pitch, but she won't stop until she finds Angie - or destroys herself in the process.

A biting critique of the internet's voyeurism, Rabbit Hole is an outrageous and heart-wrenching character study of a mind twisted by grief - and a page-turning mystery that's as addictive as a late-night Reddit binge."

I was sold at Fleabag and Reddit binge.

Posted by Miss Eliza at 12:01 AM 0 comments

Labels: Garth Marenghi, Garth Marenghi's Darkplace, H.G. Parry, Heartless, Ice Planet Barbarians, Kate Brody, Kimberly Lemming, Lucy Griffiths, Miriam Margolyes, Petter Pan, Rabbit Hole, Ruby Dixon, Subterranean Press

Siren Queen by Nghi Vo
Published by: Tordotcom
Publication Date: May 10th, 2022
Format: Hardcover, 288 Pages
To Buy

The official patter:
"From award-winning author Nghi Vo comes a dazzling new novel where immortality is just a casting call away.

It was magic. In every world, it was a kind of magic.

"No maids, no funny talking, no fainting flowers." Luli Wei is beautiful, talented, and desperate to be a star. Coming of age in pre-Code Hollywood, she knows how dangerous the movie business is and how limited the roles are for a Chinese American girl from Hungarian Hill - but she doesn't care. She’d rather play a monster than a maid.

But in Luli's world, the worst monsters in Hollywood are not the ones on screen. The studios want to own everything from her face to her name to the women she loves, and they run on a system of bargains made in blood and ancient magic, powered by the endless sacrifice of unlucky starlets like her. For those who do survive to earn their fame, success comes with a steep price. Luli is willing to do whatever it takes - even if that means becoming the monster herself.

Siren Queen offers up an enthralling exploration of an outsider achieving stardom on her own terms, in a fantastical Hollywood where the monsters are real and the magic of the silver screen illuminates every page."

THE author of last year brings us some Golden Age Hollywood that's magical. Literally.

The Lioness by Chris Bohjalian
Published by: Doubleday
Publication Date: May 10th, 2022
Format: Hardcover, 336 Pages
To Buy

The official patter:
"A luxurious African safari turns deadly for a Hollywood starlet and her entourage in this riveting historical thriller from the New York Times bestselling author of The Flight Attendant.

Tanzania, 1964. When Katie Barstow, A-list actress, and her new husband, David Hill, decide to bring their Hollywood friends to the Serengeti for their honeymoon, they envision giraffes gently eating leaves from the tall acacia trees, great swarms of wildebeests crossing the Mara River, and herds of zebras storming the sandy plains. Their glamorous guests - including Katie’s best friend, Carmen Tedesco, and Terrance Dutton, the celebrated Black actor who stars alongside Katie in the highly controversial film Tender Madness - will spend their days taking photos, and their evenings drinking chilled gin and tonics back at camp, as the local Tanzanian guides warm water for their baths. The wealthy Americans expect civilized adventure: fresh ice from the kerosene-powered ice maker, dinners of cooked gazelle meat, and plenty of stories to tell over lunch back on Rodeo Drive.

What Katie and her glittering entourage do not expect is this: a kidnapping gone wrong, their guides bleeding out in the dirt, and a team of Russian mercenaries herding their hostages into Land Rovers, guns to their heads. As the powerful sun gives way to night, the gunmen shove them into abandoned huts and Katie Barstow, Hollywood royalty, prays for a simple thing: to see the sun rise one more time. A blistering story of fame, race, love, and death set in a world on the cusp of great change, The Lioness is a vibrant masterpiece from one of our finest storytellers."

And this is classic Hollywood in Africa!

Hidden Pictures by Jason Rekulak
Published by: Flatiron Books
Publication Date: May 10th, 2022
Format: Hardcover, 384 Pages
To Buy

The official patter:
"From Jason Rekulak, Edgar-nominated author of The Impossible Fortress, comes a wildly inventive spin on the classic horror story in Hidden Pictures, a supernatural thriller about a woman working as a nanny for a young boy with strange and disturbing secrets.

Fresh out of rehab, Mallory Quinn takes a job as a babysitter for Ted and Caroline Maxwell. She is to look after their five-year-old son, Teddy.

Mallory immediately loves it. She has her own living space, goes out for nightly runs, and has the stability she craves. And she sincerely bonds with Teddy, a sweet, shy boy who is never without his sketchbook and pencil. His drawings are the usual fare: trees, rabbits, balloons. But one day, he draws something different: a man in a forest, dragging a woman’s lifeless body.

Then, Teddy’s artwork becomes increasingly sinister, and his stick figures quickly evolve into lifelike sketches well beyond the ability of any five-year-old. Mallory begins to wonder if these are glimpses of a long-unsolved murder, perhaps relayed by a supernatural force.

Knowing just how crazy it all sounds, Mallory nevertheless sets out to decipher the images and save Teddy before it’s too late."

I got chills just reading the description!

The Beloved by Harriet Evans
Published by: Grand Central Publishing
Publication Date: May 10th, 2022
Format: Hardcover, 464 Pages
To Buy

The official patter:
""It's a funny old house. They have this ceremony every summer...There's an old chapel, in the grounds of the house. It's half-derelict. The Hunters keep bees in there. Every year, on the same day, the family processes to the chapel. They open the combs, taste the honey. Take it back to the house. Half for them -" my father winced, as though he had bitten down on a sore tooth. "And half for us."

Catherine, a successful barrister, vanishes from a train station on the eve of her anniversary. Is it because she saw a figure - someone she believed long dead? Or was it a shadow cast by her troubled, fractured mind?

The answer lies buried in the past. It lies in the events of the hot, seismic summer of 1989, at Vanes - a mysterious West Country manor house - where a young girl, Jane Lestrange, arrives to stay with the gilded, grand Hunter family, and where a devastating tragedy will unfold. Over the summer, as an ancient family ritual looms closer, Janey falls for each member of the family in turn. She and Kitty, the eldest daughter of the house, will forge a bond that decades later, is still shaping the present...

'We need the bees to survive, and they need us to survive. Once you understand that, you understand the history of Vanes, you understand our family.'"

It's been too long since I've read a Harriet Evans book. This will rectify that wrong!

Someone in Time edited by Jonathan Strahan
Published by: Solaris
Publication Date: May 10th, 2022
Format: Paperback, 420 Pages
To Buy

The official patter:
"Anthology of inclusive tales of people through time looking for one another and for ways for the world to be better.

Even time travel can’t unravel love.

Time-travel is a way for writers to play with history and imagine different futures - for better, or worse.

When romance is thrown into the mix, time-travel becomes a passionate tool, or heart-breaking weapon. A time agent in the 22nd century puts their whole mission at risk when they fall in love with the wrong person. No matter which part of history a man visits, he cannot not escape his ex. A woman is desperately in love with the time-space continuum, but it doesn’t love her back. As time passes and falls apart, a time-traveller must say goodbye to their soulmate.

With stories from best-selling and award-winning authors such as Seanan McGuire, Alix E. Harrow and Nina Allan, this anthology gives a taste for the rich treasure trove of stories we can imagine with love, loss and reunion across time and space.

Including stories by: Alix E. Harrow, Zen Cho, Seanan McGuire, Sarah Gailey, Jeffrey Ford, Nina Allan, Elizabeth Hand, Lavanya Lakshminarayan, Catherynne M. Valente, Sam J. Miller, Rowan Coleman, Margo Lanagan, Sameem Siddiqui, Theodora Goss, Carrie Vaughn, Ellen Klages."

SO HERE for Zen Cho, among others!

Misrule by Heather Walter
Published by: Del Rey
Publication Date: May 10th, 2022
Format: Hardcover, 480 Pages
To Buy

The official patter:
"Does true love break curses or begin them? The dark sorceress of "Sleeping Beauty" reclaims her story in this sequel to Malice.

The Dark Grace is dead.

Feared and despised for the sinister power in her veins, Alyce wreaks her revenge on the kingdom that made her an outcast. Once a realm of decadence and beauty, Briar is now wholly Alyce’s wicked domain. And no one will escape the consequences of her wrath. Not even the one person who holds her heart.

Princess Aurora saw through Alyce’s thorny facade, earning a love that promised the dawn of a new age. But it is a love that came with a heavy price: Aurora now sleeps under a curse that even Alyce’s vast power cannot seem to break. And the dream of the world they would have built together is nothing but ash.

Alyce vows to do anything to wake the woman she loves, even if it means turning into the monster Briar believes her to be. But could Aurora love the villain Alyce has become?

Or is true love only for fairy tales?

Book Two of the Malice Duology."

I have been obsessed my whole life with anything to do with Sleeping Beauty!

Miss Butterworth and the Mad Baron by Julia Quinn
Published by: Avon
Publication Date: May 10th, 2022
Format: HPaperback, 160 Pages
To Buy

The official patter:
"From #1 New York Times bestselling author Julia Quinn comes this irresistible treat, a charming and jaunty graphic novel, based on story snippets peppered throughout a number of her books. Originally mentioned in It’s in His Kiss - one of the Bridgerton novels which inspired the smash Netflix series Bridgerton - Miss Butterworth and the Mad Baron is finally told here in its entirety for the first time.

A madcap romantic adventure, Miss Butterworth and the Mad Baron has appeared in several Julia Quinn novels and enthralled some of her most beloved characters. Now this delicious tale of love and peril is available for everyone to enjoy in this wonderfully unconventional graphic novel.

Born into a happy family that is tragically ravaged by smallpox, Miss Priscilla Butterworth uses her wits to survive a series of outlandish trials. Cruelly separated from her beloved mother and grandmother, the young girl is sent to live with a callous aunt who forces her to work for her keep. Eventually, the clever and tenderhearted Miss Butterworth makes her escape...a daring journey into the unknown that unexpectedly leads her to the "mad" baron and a lifetime of love.

Delightfully illustrated by Violet Charles, told in Julia Quinn’s playful voice, Miss Butterworth and the Mad Baron is a high-spirited nineteenth-century romp that will entertain and enchant modern readers."

Because after reading all the books, watching the show multiple times, what you need is a new book!

This Much is True by Miriam Margolyes
Published by: John Murray
Publication Date: May 10th, 2022
Format: Hardcover, 448 Pages
To Buy

The official patter:
"BAFTA-winning actor, voice of everything from Monkey to the Cadbury's Caramel Rabbit, creator of a myriad of unforgettable characters from Lady Whiteadder to Professor Sprout, Miriam Margoyles, OBE, is the nation's favourite (and naughtiest) treasure. Now, at the age of 80, she has finally decided to tell her extraordinary life story - and it's well worth the wait.

Find out how being conceived in an air-raid gave her curly hair; what pranks led to her being known as the naughtiest girl Oxford High School ever had; how she ended up posing nude for Augustus John as a teenager; why Bob Monkhouse was the best (male) kiss she's ever had; and what happened next after Warren Beatty asked 'Do you fuck?'

From declaring her love to Vanessa Redgrave to being told to be quiet by the Queen, this book is packed with brilliant, hilarious stories. With a cast list stretching from Scorsese to Streisand, a cross-dressing Leonardo di Caprio to Isaiah Berlin, This Much Is True is as warm and honest, as full of life and surprises, as its inimitable author."

Fuck I love Miriam Margoyles!