Showing posts with label Jeeves and Wooster. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Jeeves and Wooster. Show all posts

Wednesday, June 3, 2026

Season 33 - Goodbye, Mr. Chips (2003-2004)

The British have such a love of their public schools that is equal parts nostalgia and trauma that they have immortalized it in print time and time again. Tom Brown's School Days is always the first that leaps to mind, but there are so many that I can name from those that embrace the genre, like Goodbye, Mr. Chips, to those that subvert the genre, particularly Ronald Searle with his St. Trinian's comics. You could even make a valid argument to include The Prime of Miss Jean Brodie amongst their numbers even if Wikipedia doesn't. Mr. Chipping has been depicted several times on screen by the great luminaries of the day, from Robert Donant, who won an Oscar for his portrayal, to Peter O'Toole, who sang and danced as Mr. Chips, to Roy Marsden, the most famous of all Dalglieshes. So why did the 2002 adaptation land on Martin Clunes? You have to remember that at this time he wasn't the household name he is now for portraying Dr. Martin Ellingham. "Doc Martin" was still very much in its nascence. Martin Clunes had played Dr. Martin Bamford in the film Saving Grace and the character had been re-contextualized for two television movies, only one of which had aired at this time, and which, in my mind, have almost nothing to do with the series. Other than that his career was almost all one-off episodes where his character was invariably along the lines of his portrayal of Barmy on Jeeves and Wooster or Anna Massey's ill-fated son on Inspector Morse. In other words, big-hearted and bumbling. A golden retriever or Labrador of a person. He comes in smiling with that big mobile mouth and his outsized ears and is just a ray of sunshine. And I honestly believe, from years of watching him, that this is exactly who he is as a person. In other words, the exact opposite of a taciturn doctor in Cornwall who graced our screens for ten series. Which is why I think he was perfect for this role. He shows up at this school where the most formative years of a young boys life will also be the cruelest and he is horrified by what he sees. And you can see it there, all on his face. He doesn't believe in corporeal punishment he believes in kindness. Soon he finds a woman who believes the same as him and they are married and she helps him to see that love is what these children need. He isn't able to get much traction on his desired reforms and soon he loses the love of his life in childbirth, but his students love him. Students who are going to die in droves in the first World War. Is this supposed to be happy? What is the message? Look what one man with a heart of gold can do and fuck war? Wait, were all these books written to self sooth to be a balm on the wounds of how horrible British public schools were and that war was actually better than being bullied at school? Because this starts out so uplifting and ends in tears. Mr. Chips changes hearts and minds and then the bodies housing those hearts and minds die in the trenches. I really can't believe how much death is in this. Why couldn't he and his wife have had a happy ending? Why did his only children have to be the students? I mean, it's too bittersweet for me. Yes, the war had so much death and given the time period I expected that this would encompass the first World War, I was just hoping, maybe, I don't know, something more upbeat and not bleak. Well, if I had stopped it halfway through that would have been the case. So I heartily approve of watching this nice fifty minute movie. There are not another fifty minutes. There are only fifty. That is all. His wife says she is expecting, cue the credits.

Friday, February 21, 2025

Book Review - Anthony Berkeley's The Wintringham Mystery

The Wintringham Mystery by Anthony Berkeley
Published by: Revelation Press
Publication Date: 1926
Format: Kindle, 268 Pages
Rating: ★★★
To Buy (different edition than one reviewed)

When Stephen Munro inherited a comfortable fortune he had two choices. One was to squirrel it away and live sensibly. The other was to live his life to the fullest until his funds ran out. He chose the later. Which is why at the age of twenty-seven he has taken a job as the footman to Lady Susan Carey at Winteringham Hall in Sussex. He has given up hopes of a carefree future with Pauline Mainwaring and is ready to take whatever the world will throw at him. His omniscient valet, Bridger, knowing that Stephen will be unable to take what the world has in store has already secured a job for himself with Lady Susan as her under-gradener. It wouldn't do to leave Stephen adrift in the world. Who knows what might happen? As it transpires, murder is what happens. But not at first. At first Stephen is in for a rude awakening. Because despite Lady Susan and her niece Millicent being somewhat charmed by Stephen's attempts at making a go of things, the butler, Martin, is not. Martin is going to put Stephen through his paces, with the added complication that there is to be a house party and Stephen knows most of the guests and he now must answer to William. Because all the footmen at Winteringham Hall are called William. The guests, Stephen's friends, soon start arriving. Or at least some of them were his friends before his newly reduced circumstances. There's an old friend of Lady Susan's, Colonel Uffclume, the explorer John Starcross, dandy Henry Kentisbeare, a bright young thing, Baby Cullompton, Lady Susan's niece and Stephen's friend Freddie Venables, and worst of all, Pauline Mainwaring with her new fiance, the "Stock Exchange Knight," Sir Julius Hammerstein. They are soon joined by Cecily Vernon, who had been staying with Lady Susan but was to have left earlier in the day and has now returned to Winteringham Hall. Of all of them Freddie is having the hardest time treating Stephen as staff. And when he gets up the idea to hold a seance, well, despite being a footman, Stephen is roped into the scheme. At the seance Cecily disappears. Everyone but Lady Susan is up in arms. Stephen is sacked but asked to stay on as a guest. She wishes him to look into Cecily's disappearance. Because she has an idea on how she did it, just not how she had the knowledge. Plus, it gives the old lady a chance to play matchmaker and get Stephen and Pauline back together and get ride of the odious Sir Julius. But putting the pieces of the puzzle together is easier said than done, especially once there is a ransom demand and Martin ends up dead. But if Stephen can just connect the dots he might get the girl of his dreams and a happily ever after.

The Winteringham Mystery's claim to fame is that not even Agatha Christie could solve it. The story was originally serialized in The Daily Mirror when it was the vogue to run competitions to see if the newspaper's readers could solve a case. And the prizes were quite significant, about $20,000 by today's standards. Agatha Christie was known to enter them, tying with eleven others for the runner's up prize for the Daily Sketch's The Mystery of Norman's Court. Notably she entered The Daily Mirror's competition under her husband's name, Colonel A.E. Christie. Alas, even though she was a runner up, she was unable to solve to disappearance of Stella, Cecily's original name, and this inability has led to the book's claim to fame. Though The Winteringham Mystery was out of print for nearly ninety-five years, so perhaps she got the last laugh? But it's still interesting that she was unable to answer "How did Stella Disappear?" and "Who caused her disappearance, and why?" I figured out the who and was mostly right on the why, I mean, money being the why is the oldest answer in the book... But I don't think I would have been awarded a prize. The genius of Anthony Berkeley is his answers are in plain sight so when he actually explains it you nod sagely and go, yeah, I could have solved it, all the while knowing you totally didn't. And this book had a light touch. Fun characters, witty dialogue, and while I was sad that the Jeeves and Wooster vibe established in the first chapter didn't continue throughout the book with Bridger barely being seen afterwards, that P.G. Wodehouse banter still continued. Because this would be Bertie Wooster solving crime. The stakes? The stakes are amusing an old woman. And I want to be that old woman. I want my whims catered to, I want to call someone named Stephen William just because. I want to not call the police if it's my prerogative. And, I want to be a blatant matchmaker. That last one I think is a little jab at Agatha Christie's expense because she's always matchmaking but never being explicit about it, here, Lady Susan is like, yeah, I'm matchmaking while you solve crimes, and? I mean, sure Lady Susan might strain credulity by her methods, but, I say the method to her madness is what makes this book work, makes Stephen as layabout cum footman cum crime solver believable. What I didn't find believable is that everyone was intimately familiar with chloroform and that this is viewed as a Christmas book. It takes place in September. Well, no one gets it one hundred percent right. Not even Agatha Christie.

Friday, May 14, 2021

Season 22 - Jeeves & Wooster Series 2 (1992-1993)

Stephen Fry and Hugh Laurie are gateway drugs to the best of British comedy. For me it all started with Peter's Friends, which is technically not a comedy, but Fry and Laurie also go beyond the bounds of the comedic label, so I think that's a good starting off point. From there I found The Young Ones, Filthy Rich and Catflap, Blackadder, A Bit of Fry and Laurie, and, of course, Jeeves and Wooster. To this day they are to me everything that is great and good about British acting and television. I will listen to or watch anything that they are in, but it's when they are working together that they reach new heights. Jeeves and Wooster was actually made concurrently with A Bit of Fry and Laurie and I think that them working together at all times made the relationship between Bertie and Jeeves that much more real. What's more, their personalities kind of fit their characters so much so that at times I might wonder if Stephen Fry is wandering around Hugh Laurie's house tidying it up and putting things to rights. Stephen Fry's fussy side comes out while Hugh Laurie's goofy side with a large dollop of musicality come to the fore. Jeeves and Wooster is pure fun comfort viewing, it has the beautiful country houses, troubles that aren't too troubling, and there's the fact that you'll see all your favorite British actors playing minor rolls which were constantly being recast, usually to delightful results. I mean four different actresses playing Aunt Dahlia kind of lends itself to the idea that Bertie has a never-ending stream of interfering aunts. But series two was when the show found it's stride. Series one they rouged Laurie's checks so much he looked like a comical vaudeville drunk. But in series two Simon Langton took over as director! Not only did he direct the seminal Pride and Prejudice adaptation, the one with Colin Firth, but episodes of Upstairs, Downstairs, The Duchess of Duke Street, Love for Lydia, Rebecca with Jeremy Brett, Poirot, Rosemary and Thyme, Foyle's War, and Midsomer Murders! Plus series two happens to have my most watched episode of Jeeves and Wooster. How is it I've seen "Chuffy" what seems like a million times? Perhaps because it's the episode where Jeeves quits... Heaven forfend! Don't worry, it all works out! It always does in the England that never was of P.G. Wodehouse.

Wednesday, June 20, 2018

Amaranth Books

Bookstore: Amaranth Books

Location: Evanston, Illinois

Why I Love Them: Amaranth Books is a bookstore I found by accident. I had headed to Evanston for a book signing at the local Barnes and Noble but what really drew me to the area was Bookman's Alley. This labyrinthine bookstore was mentioned in Audrey Niffenegger's The Time Traveler's Wife and was, to me, the most memorable part of that book. So I made the pilgrimage and as I looked through the shelves and stepped over the piles of books I heard the owner, Roger Carlson, talking about the time Frank Sinatra hit on his wife. After I went into sensory overload from the sheer number of rooms and artifacts I decided to wander around the neighborhood and saw a Red Mango frozen yogurt shop. My friend Jess had recommended them to me so I went in for a post book binge treat and as I sat eating my pomegranate infused dessert I noticed a small storefront that said Amaranth Books: Used and Rare. I HAD to check it out. The store is very small, only a few aisles wide and not that deep. But for how small they are they have an amazing collection, especially of British authors that are rather hard to find stateside. There's something to be said for small stores that are well curated. Amaranth might not have had the lure of Bookman's Alley, but for all that, I bought more books at Amaranth...     

Best Buy: While I have only been able to get to the store a few times, my first visit was a true book buying success story. I adore P.G. Wodehouse. More than that I adore Overlook Press' amazing hardcover re-releases with the vintage style covers and the stripped endpaper. The problem is they are rather pricey, coupled with how prolific Wodehouse was as a writer, and this can put a serious dent in your wallet. Therefore, aside from the Jeeves and Wooster series which was worth any price, I have attempted to find all the rest of the books at used bookstores. I sometimes am successful, occasionally I have been very successful, but more often than not I strike out. That first day in Amaranth, oh, they had SO MANY of the Wodehouse books I just wanted them all. I NEEDED them all. But I was trying to be good. So I bought only the first Blandings story, Something Fresh, and then went to my book signing and then went home and stewed. I felt that I had just missed a big opportunity. I should have bought all the books they had, but I didn't. I held out hope that when I returned in the future they would still be there. But I knew, in my heart of hearts, they wouldn't be. Ironically when I did return for a book buying spree it was at Bookman's Alley and a local Half Price Books where I found more Wodehouse, because of course Amaranth had sold theirs. But I know that whenever I get the chance to return they will surely have something I need to buy.  

Wednesday, May 29, 2013

Book Review - Dorothy L. Sayers's Clouds of Witness

Clouds of Witness (Lord Peter Wimsey Book 2) by Dorothy L. Sayers
Published by: Harper Torch
Publication Date: 1926
Format: Paperback, 288 Pages
Rating: ★★
To Buy (different edition than one reviewed)

Lord Peter is taking some time off in Corsica. He has been incommunicado for some time. Therefore it is quite a surprise to him on arriving in Paris to find his older brother's name splashed across the front of the papers. Gerald has been arrested for murder! For once Lord Peter can show Gerald that his "lurid hobby" might be of some use to the family. Rushing back to England Lord Peter is fighting against the passing of time and the fact that the inquest has already happened. The family was in Riddlesdale, Yorkshire, where Gerald had rented out a lodge for hunting. Peter and Gerald's younger sister Mary was playing hostess and her fiance, Denis Cathcart was the victim of foul play.

Yet the motive for Gerald killing Cathcart is absurdly flimsy. Supposedly Gerald found out about Cathcart being a cardsharp and told him to leave. Why this should result in murder makes no sense. But Gerald is being obdurate. He will not tell where he was or what he was doing that night. The fact that Mary is also lying soon becomes obvious. With his own family obfuscating the truth, Lord Peter takes many a wrong turn, some into very boggy situations, before he heroically saves the day.

Me and Lord Peter have come to a bit of an understanding with this latest volume. Firstly, I didn't at any time want to hurl it across the room and I would only grumble about the stupid title every hour or so, not constantly. Clouds of Witness is one of those awkwardly titled books, I keep wanting to say "Clouds of Whiteness"... because, clouds, generally speaking, are white. If the title actually was the line used in the book "cloud of witnesses" that might have worked better, but still, awkward and will forever be a title I mangle. Back to me not hating Peter so much. Sure, most of the problems of the previous volume still proliferated, but the crime itself was far more interesting. In fact, I might have said I actually liked this book if the end of it hadn't gotten so bogged down in Gerald's trial that I was lost in a morass of legalese of outmoded British laws. If there is only one thing British I could be said to hate it's outmoded British courtroom dramas, this being the second worse perpetrator, P.D. James being the queen with Death Comes to Pemberley.

What I don't get is Sayers's weird way of setting up the crime in this case. It is odd that we arrive with Peter after the crime is committed. Almost as if we where the police brought in after some time to get to the bottom of things. Usually when you have a traditional country house murder that is very familial you're there every step of the way. Here it's a very different and novel approach. I personally was left a little cold by it. By not being on the ground and in the trenches as it happened, I was unable to get a connection to these other characters. They were literally just people I read about not cared about, which is the difference between a so-so book and a great book. Also, if she was going to take this tack of following Peter, why does Sayers let Peter wander off and leave is in the dark? She contradicts herself by changing her narrative style, especially at the end when Peter dramatically enters the House of Lords and lays out the case. If she had stayed true to the earlier half of the book we could have followed Peter and then curtailed the drawn out court case... just saying...

My big complaint of the previous volume was that you can't really tell one character from another, them all having, basically, the same voice. She seemed to have gotten this criticism at the time as well because she laboriously tries to make the Yorkshire natives "real" with a weird dialect that doesn't really work. I mean, yes, it's kind of funny because it's Jeeves and Wooster meets Wuthering Heights... but it just came across as not quite right and just another thing slightly wrong that made the book less whole. I also think I understand why Lord Peter annoys me. The way he's written he talks like he's speaking gibberish, like a 1920s version of Doctor Who. Sure it can be funny, and far more enjoyable if you picture Matt Smith as Lord Peter, but in the end, it's tiring trying to pick out the important bits of information from his verbal diarrhea. A forty minute show is one thing, and 300 page novel is another. Once again I shall lament the need for editors and move onto another book... hopefully this one without an author who assumes the reader is fluent in French... a common misconception of writers at the time... damn you Sayers and Mitford!

Friday, May 24, 2013

Book Review - Dorothy L. Sayers's Whose Body?

Whose Body? (Lord Peter Wimsey Book 1) by Dorothy L. Sayers
Published by: Harper Torch
Publication Date: 1923
Format: Paperback, 212 Pages
Rating: ★
To Buy (different edition than one reviewed)

Lord Peter Wimsey and his manservant Bunter are very lucky in their lifestyle, in that they get to indulge their passions. For Lord Peter, this is rare Folios and amateur sleuthing, for Bunter, this is photography, which can be very helpful in amateur sleuthing. When Lord Peter hears about a body mysteriously appearing in the bathroom of the architect Thipps, his curiosity is peeked. He is even willing to miss a rare book auction to get there before the police cordon makes it impossible. Lord Peter sees many things amiss, but can't quite put his finger on anything in particular, aside from the fact that the police have got it all wrong.

While at the same time, Inspector Parker, a friend of Lord Peter's, is investigating the disappearance of Sir Reuben Levy. At first the cops jump to the conclusion that the body in the tub must be a shorn Levy... but aside from their both being Jewish and of a similar appearance, this is obviously not the case. Yet... could the two be somehow connected. Inspector Parker with Lord Peter and Bunter are determined to get to the bottom of this, even if it puts them in personal peril. At least if they have to hole up at Lord Peter's there is plenty to read and drink.

Please don't attack me for not liking this book. Send me no death threats or piercing glances. No flamethrowers in the darkness to wake me from a deep sleep. I know it verges on sacrilege to say I didn't like this book, but... I just didn't like this book. I will use as my "get out of jail free" card the fact that many people have told me to just skip to Strong Poison and the arrival of Harriet Vane or to just skip ahead to Gaudy Night, which is the best by far. So, my thought is, that what they're really saying, instead of emphasising the awesomeness of Harriet Vane, they're pointing out the flaws in the earlier books and are trying to get me to skip ahead so I won't abandon Lord Peter before he meets his match. That's how I'm justifying it, ok?

The overwhelming problem with Whose Body is that Dorothy L. Sayers can't write. I mean, literally, this book verged on the incomprehensible. Shall I sweep this under the rug as the foibles of a first time writer? Or shall I ripe her to shreds? Shreds it is. Whose Body almost reads like some bizarre exercise to get as many styles of writing into one book. First, there's the standard third-person narration, which isn't well executed, but, at least it's expected. Then she throws in some straight up back and forth dialogue, which, I'm cool with, Lisa Lutz does it all the time, so, that's fine, and also, for the 1920s, pretty novel. Sayers occasionally verges into epistolary form, which again, I'm down with that. Her haphazard and incomprehensible annotations are more then a little odd. I really don't know why she does them, they don't further the plot or even make sense.

Where the book really started to fall apart is when she randomly, I mean seriously, why did she just do this for a few random pages, went into second-person narration. Second-person narration never really works for me, and here it just comes out of left field. Was I supposed to feel like I was there at the graveside exhumation? Because the narrative shift just made me think I was reading some bizarre experiment by a bad writer and instantly pulled me out of the book. Finally, the meta. While meta is a concept that has taken on in recent years with it's self referential attitude, it's not really a new thing. Agatha Christie would sometimes have Poirot joke about how "real life" isn't like a "detective story" and the reader would laugh thinking, little did Poirot know, he's fictional. Sayers takes this further and is having Lord Peter always joke about detective stories and Sherlock Holmes and Raffles. Ok, cute a few times, but you've beat it to death. Stop. Just stop. Nothing you can do, even making me laugh (which I didn't), redeems the slipshod writing and amateurish style.

So how about the characters? They are so flat and similar that I couldn't tell who was speaking till a "what" tagged onto the end of a sentence made me go, oh, Lord Peter must have been talking. Peter and Parker, their mode of speaking and the habit of Sayers to not qualify the speaker makes Whose Body a muddled mess. Then there's the fact that Lord Peter and Bunter are really just bad shades of Jeeves and Wooster with crime solving inclinations. Which wasn't helped by my recently watching the new show Blandings (horrid first episode, gets radically better), because I kept picturing Jack Farthing as The Hon. Frederick Threepwood with his bland acting, over the top facial expressions and fly away hair as Lord Peter. Why you might say? Because Freddie has the "what" disease, that seems to plague the upper crust in order to get a laugh. While Wodehouse did this humorously, as I've said, I think Sayers just did it, not as a character trait, but as an afterthought... some way to make Peter not Parker. The one aspect of Lord Peter that did interest me was his PTSD. I've railed against this before in literature, but it's interesting to see it in literature of the time, before it was diagnosed to death and had "stereotypical symptoms." This shell shock could prove to be interesting.

Now, I will say, one thing that I did find interesting. Yes, there really was only one, because I figured out the killer damn early and was offended by the antisemitism. There are many groan worthy lines, but one was so obviously, "Look Here! KILLER!" that it made me audibly groan. Ok, enough of the being mean, here's what I liked. I liked that Lord Peter is so obviously not Poirot. That needs some explanation. So, with The Murder on the Links, Poirot is always railing against the modern methods, the fingerprints and footprints and what have you, while Lord Peter and Bunter are openly embracing them. In fact, Bunter is often updating to the latest gadgets just because he can. While endlessly reading about forensics might get boring after awhile, I find it interesting that Sayers, writing at the same time as Christie, decided to take such a radically different approach. Good on you Sayers, but I'm still hugely grateful this wasn't chosen as my bookclub's selection, I don't think they would have ever forgiven me for how bad it is.

Friday, January 14, 2011

Masterpiece at 40!

Today marks the 40th anniversary of Masterpiece, no longer, but still thought of as Theatre. Masterpiece Theatre brought the best of British Broadcasting and period dramas to the United States, long before technology allowed us to have easy access to, what I view, as the best television in the world. Today, over at The Daily Beast, Jace Lacob is talking about those shows polled as the best, Upstairs Downstairs, Prime Suspect, Downton Abbey, Bleak House, Sherlock, Jeeves and Wooster, Cranford, The Politician's Wife, The Forsyte Saga, House of Cards, Our Mutual Friend and Traffik. I of course, happened to notice, that this did not actually coincide with the poll which I eagerly watched when Derek Jacobi counted it down, not least of all cause some of these shows came way after the poll and were inserted to show their continuing excellence. Because I voted in this poll and, probably ended up being the one who rigged The Forsyte Saga into winning second place, I want to set the record straight. I also want to say a few things about these beloved shows, but first a little Masterpiece rant. PBS used to be the only place that showcased these fine shows, that is no longer the case. From BBC America to cable channels willing to spotlight British Broadcasting, the American love of all things British has never dwindled, yet PBS has. They now edit shows for content and time, Downton Abbey being a case in point. Instead of having the show naturally develop over seven weeks they hacked and slashed it to make it four episodes. No matter if these are "improvements" according to them. This show was written in 45 minute arcs, no more, no less. PBS has become a joke. In a day and age when technology makes these show available sooner and other outlets are moving with the times they need to step it up. BBC America has same day airing of Doctor Who but we have to wait YEARS for shows to make it to PBS. They have become lazy and all the greatness of these shows is due to the BBC, not Rebecca Eaton, who is hanging onto their coattails trying to make it look like she has made a contribution. They may show the best, but it's a paired down best that lacks the greatness of Russell Baker and instead relies on "star value" to sell these shows with little quippy intros of no depth or historical bearing, this doesn't apply to you Alan Cumming, I love you. But enough about my rant, which doesn't even touch on the fact the old Mystery intro needs to be brought back... here are the top twelve shows as counted down by Derek Jacobi, not inaccurately reported by Jace Lacob.

12) Jeeves and Wooster: Sheer brilliance. Hugh Laurie and Stephen Fry were MADE to play these roles.

11) Wives and Daughters: One of my favorite miniseries ever. There is just one flaw, in that Roger and Molly don't have a romantic kiss... but I'll overlook that, most of the time. Andrew Davies is a genius and this is even better than Pride and Prejudice. Yep, you heard me right! Better than P and P, yes, Michael Gambon, take that victory lap.

10) Moll Flanders: Alex Kingston is awesome in the fun frolicking romp, too band the really bad music detracts from the awesome. Also Daniel Craig in a long flowing wig, so funny.

9) Reckless: I admit, I haven't watched it all, because my DVR messed up, but what I saw was really great, how could it not be with this cast? Francesca Annis, Robson Green and Michael Kitchen!

8) House of Cards: You might very well think that; I couldn't possibly comment.

7) Poldark: Cornwall and shipwrecks!

6) Jewel in the Crown: After Brideshead, this set the standard for what could be done with period drama willing to move outside the studio.

5) Prime Suspect: What made Helen Mirren a star, and rightfully so. Also, the first instance of PBS editing for content. The first of the slippery slope.

4) Bleak House: Which I have made my peace with. I will no longer be bashing it, yes it is awesome, as long as you don't watch the last episode. I mean WTF! It's dark, it's atmospheric and then, happy ever after garden party time.

3) I, Claudius: Not really my thing, but made some many stars.

2) The Forsyte Saga: The best miniseries ever hands down. It's almost too painful to watch with it's raw emotions and superb acting. Just be prepared to cry. A lot.

1) Upstairs, Downstairs: The standard. What BBC television is, was and shall ever be. If you haven't ever watched it, I feel sad for your pathetic little lives.

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