strange and random happenstance

The Shadow of the Wind by Carlos Ruin Zafon
Published by: Penguin
Publication Date: 2001
Format: Paperback, 487 Pages
Rating: ★★
To Buy (different edition than one reviewed)

There is a secret organization that lovingly cares for and protects rare and old books. The Cemetery of Forgotten Books has a tradition, that when you are first brought to the labyrinthine structure you must pick one book among the thousand of thousands and protect it for life. When young Daniel Sempere is taken there by his father he picks up a book by Julián Carax called The Shadow of the Wind. Daniel devours the book from cover to cover and has a fire burning inside him to know more about Julián Carax. But there are no other books by Julián Carax anymore. A man who has taken his moniker from the devil in Carax's book, Laín Coubert, has slowly been finding every copy of all Carax's titles and burning them. Daniel, along with his sidekick Fermín, start to unravel the mysterious life of Julián Carax and why anyone would want to remove his literary oeuvre from history. It is a journey that is dangerous and dark, with a twisted secret at the center of it.

Ever since I first watched The Neverending Story I thought how wonderful it would be to find a book that was truly magical. To wander into a shop filled with shelves and shelves of stories and have one call out to me and ask me to be the bearer of it's secrets. I think this is a dream that all bibliophiles hold deep in their hearts, that there is a story out there just for them and it will change the course of their lives. It seemed to me that Daniel Sempere, much like Bastian before him, had inadvertently stumbled into this dream. Devouring this book over the course of a few short days I realized that not every dream is satisfactory, and in the hands of the wrong author, can be dull, predictable, and at times insipid. And I would like it noted I devoured this book because I had a book club meeting fast approaching and it had nothing to do with the book itself. And to all those people who lauded this book I seriously want to ask you why!?!

Firstly, let's talk about incest. This has become, in recent years, the most overused trope I can possibly think of. I mean they even used it on a CW show! If a trope has trickled all the way down to be acceptable by the brainless teenagers who actually watch this station then it's time to get a new trope. From Flowers in the Attic to A Game of Thrones, seriously, is this supposed to shock us anymore? Sure, once it was a great taboo, and in actuality, it still is, but fictionally? Nope. To have the big reveal of what destroyed Julian Carax's life was his love of Penélope Aldaya, whom he didn't know was his sister, was laughable. All this build up, all these leads that Daniel Sempere searched and hunted through all the streets of Barcelona to come to this? Oh please. It's not like they knew they were siblings. Sigh, what some people find as a shocking reveal can be shockingly flat.

The predictability of The Shadow of the Wind might just be the biggest flaw. I saw the incest coming a mile off, just one scene with Penélope's father and Julian's mother and that was that. Of course it takes the characters hundreds of pages to get to this reveal which leads to my other main gripe, the lack of forward momentum. You'd think that a man hunting you down through the streets to destroy a book you are bound to protect all while trying to find out his reasoning would be a headlong rush with adrenaline pounding in your veins. You'd be wrong. It plods and limps through the streets of Barcelona occasionally even going back on its self to retell things that were boring the first time. Oh, and the stupidity of the characters! Just wow. The height of this is when Nuria Monfort tells her side of the story, which was basically her retelling the whole book from her point of view! Almost a hundred pages of her being repetitive. Also, what really annoyed me, she supposedly wrote this all out by hand when what was her job? A secretary who could type really fast! And what did Daniel mention seeing in her apartment the first time he was there? A typewriter! Oh, for fucks sack. They all deserved to die.

But let's move to the bigger picture now. At the time directly preceding the actions of Daniel Sempere the Spanish Civil War happened. Yeah, the war mentioned so subtly you could miss it wasn't World War II, because Spain remained neutral during that specific war. And despite what Wikipedia might try to convince you, the war is just the subtlest of afterthoughts and is in no way as important as it should have been to the narrative. I'm not sure if this omission to not discuss the Spanish Civil War was accidental or on purpose. The book was written by a Spanish author so maybe he just assumed that this backdrop was common knowledge. Well, it isn't. A good editor when bringing this book to market in the US should have asked for something more to be slipped in, but then again, I don't really think it was well translated and well, in the end, I really didn't care.

What was interesting though was the discussion this book brought about in my book club as to what defines a book as Gothic. Luckily The Guardian has recently come out with a nice infographic to help you decide, Gothic or Not it. The villain could have been scarier, but the fact that he destroyed things by fire, that could be considered Gothic. The hero had a family AND a sidekick, this is definitely NOT Gothic. Was there spooky locations that might just be haunted... not really. It takes place in slightly olden days in a foreign country, so it's got that. There's snow and some rain and fog, but overall the weather isn't as oppressive as it should be. Overall, it didn't feel Gothic. Because to me, Gothic is a feeling more then anything else. A spookiness you feel in your bones that makes you keep reading late into the night out of sheer terror for what will happen to the hero or heroine next as they are cut off from the world and facing the horrors on their own. In other words, if you actually want Gothic go read Rebecca or The Monk and stay clear of The Shadow of the Wind.

Posted by Miss Eliza at 12:00 AM 0 comments  

Labels: A Game of Thrones, Barcelona, Carlos Ruin Zafon, Flowers in the Attic, Gothic, Incest, Julián Carax, Rebecca, Spain, The Guardian, The Monk, The Neverending Story, The Shadow of the Wind

The 13th Warrior
Based on the book Eaters of the Dead by Michael Crichton
Starring: Antonio Banderas, Diane Venora, Vladimir Kulich, Dennis Storhøi, Omar Sharif, Clive Russell, Richard Bremmer, Tony Curran, Eric Avari, Sven Wollter, Asbjorn Riis, and Maria Bonnevie
Release Date: August 27th, 1999
Rating: ★
To Buy

Ahmad ibn Fadlan is a successful court poet in Baghdad. But his poetic sensibilities lead him to love unwisely and he is banished far to the north to act as an ambassador to those tribes of Barbarians. The arrival of Vikings save Ahmad ibn Fadlan and his party great distress from Turkic Raiders. The Northmen are celebrating the death of their chieftain and the ascension of their new leader, Buliwyf. A young emissary arrives to ask Buliwyf if he will come to his father's kingdom and save them from an evil which cannot be named. The Viking's wisewoman comes to throw the bones and tells Buliwfy that the thirteenth warrior must not be a Norseman, and so Ahmad, called Ibn by his new travelling companions, unwillingly heads out to do battle with an evil he doesn't know with warriors who don't even speak his language. When they arrive at King Hrothgar's village the warriors see that the situation is more dire then they feared. The town is almost indefensible, and the mist is coming, and with that, the danger of the Wendol.

It makes sense that the oddest book in Crichton's oeuvre would make the oddest film. But still, I question this adaptation's purpose because whatever the book's failings there was at least a glimmer of something interesting, a little Viking culture, a little mystery in the mist, which has been entirely stripped away to be nothing more then over ninety minutes of battle. There is so little plot that I wouldn't even deign to call it a plot, something other critics and moviegoers apparently agreed with as the movie quickly flopped at the box office. The movie should have just been called "Buliwyf Does Battle." At least re-naming the story for release as The 13th Warrior versus Eaters of the Dead helped to highlight this lack of depth. The simple truth about this film is I struggled with it. This is a nothing film. Watching the movie I kept thinking to myself, how can I even write a review about a movie that is so lacking of anything that it is slipping out or my mind as unforgettable as I'm viewing it? This is just a bad movie, plain and simple, and this is after extensive re-shoots. The curious side of me wonders how bad the film was before the re-shoots. The fact that Crichton had to swoop in to try to save it makes me contemplative. If Crichton didn't step into the breech for the laugh riot that Congo became and the horror show The Lost World turned into, just exactly how horrible was this movie?

Even in this "polished" and "fixed" format it's a weird movie. Antonio Banderas is nothing so much as comic relief and nowhere approaching a romantic hero. Also, the film doesn't feel of it's time. Now I'm not talking about the tenth century when it's supposed to take place, I'm talking about the turn of the last century. This doesn't feel like a film from 1999, it feels like a film from the mid 80s. In fact it feels as if this film is the kindred spirit to Ladyhawke and Masters of the Universe with a little Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom thrown in for the Wendol. Because the Wendol sure as hell don't look like they belong in Scandinavia! India, maybe. If that India came out of the fevered dreams of Lucas and Spielberg. If only we could get this Jerry Goldsmith score, which is laughably bad and uneven, replaced with a score by Tangerine Dream, a la Legend, I think, aside from Antonio Banderas being on screen, no one watching it would think it was made later then 1987. Just look to that 80s hair band appearance of all the vikings, and I think my point has been made.

In a film of weird and awkward scenes strung together with no regard to plot or pace there is one scene that sticks out. I really can't tell if it was really cool or really lame. In the beginning of the film it's a big deal that Ibn can't speak the language and therefore needs not one by two translators. This not only makes the movie hard to get into, but with Omar Sharif re-telling the events happening in the film I felt as if I was watching this documentary I saw years ago on the IMAX about the Nile that he narrated. But these clunky opening scenes are nothing to the scene where Ibn "learns" the language of the Northmen. Over the course of what we presume is many weeks we just see Ibn staring at the mouths of the Vikings around the fire. The first time it is all gibberish, but slowly, through rain and snow, words are decipherable until finally he understands everything they say, being able to then speak to them and also scaring them with the rapidity of his learning. While I like that it had a realism with him slowly learning, like everything in this film, it was handled in such a cheesy and heavy-handed manner that I'm not sure if I liked it or if it was groan worthy. I tend to lean toward groan worthy, just because of the rest of the movie.

The depiction of the Wendol was also just odd. As previously mentioned, they obviously are inspired by the evil death cult in Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom, what with their sartorial choices as well as taking off their victims heads and gnawing on their bodies. This is also where the movie diverged most radically from the book. The book clearly proposed the theory that the Wendol where really Neanderthals. There is nothing Neanderthal here, as Ibn screams "they are just men!" All their danger lies in the trappings of their appearance, not in their mysticism. The bone shirts and the bear headdresses are the signifiers that these people are evil and mean business. I'm sorry, but no. Looking a little different and killing people isn't enough for what is supposed to be the epicness of Beowulf! Plus, the Vikings kill each other all the time for dominance, land, and fun, so how are the Wendol different? The only real atrocity these people have committed, as far as I've seen, is that they must singlehandedly be responsible for Scandinavia having a depleted bear population because each and every one of their thousands of warriors has a bear headdress. Crimes against nature, yes, crimes against man, debatable.  

But the worst part of this movie I think falls into the category of racial insensitivity. Ibn is from Baghdad, in Iraq; Antonio Banderas is from Málaga, in Spain. These countries aren't interchangeable. Just because Antonio isn't white doesn't mean he's middle eastern! Besides the atrocities of an obvious spray tan and so much guyliner that it's laughable, his accent is in no way correct. In fact, more then once I noticed that if Ibn said "Hello, my name is Inigo Montoya, you killed my father, prepare to die" it would seem logical. Because he is THAT Spanish. His accent is so Spanish it's stereotypical Spanish. It is obvious that Antonio Banderas did nothing to help the box office of this film so why not just hire an Iraqi actor? But time and again this happens in Hollywood. Don't they get it that here's a chance to do something right and then they go and do something wrong, like Rooney Mara playing Tiger Lily! Seriously folks! The reason this pisses me off even more is that Michael Crichton knows better. He has DONE BETTER! Look to Rising Sun! Instead of hiring anyone who looked Asian for the Japanese roles, the movie used all Japanese actors! I know, it's a novel idea, but there it is.

Posted by Miss Eliza at 12:00 AM 0 comments  

Labels: 80s, Antonio Banderas, Beowulf, Congo, Eaters of the Dead, He-Man, Indiana Jones, Inigo Montoya, Legend, Michael Crichton, Racism, Rising Sun, Spain, The 13th Warrior, The Lost World, The Princess Bride, Viking

Cry Wolf (Alpha and Omega Book 1) by Patricia Briggs
Published by: Ace
Publication Date: July 29th, 2008
Format: Paperback, 320 Pages
Rating: ★★★★★
To Buy
Anna is off to Montana with Charles. Little does she know that in the dark, snowbound forest, evil is lurking. Leaving Chicago behind is at once exhilarating and terrifying. She no longer has the fear of her pack, she now has the fear of the unknown. What does Charles expect of her? Is he really a good man? Upon landing in Aspen Creek, Anna is all the villagers are talking about. The stoic and cold Charles has found a mate. Too bad the first time that she gets to be presented to the masses is at Doc Wallace's funeral. A time of respect and reflection is turned into a bit of a to-do when another wolf, Asil, makes a bit of a play for Anna, but recoils when he realizes she's an Omega. Later, back at Charles' house, he explains to Anna that she's quite a catch and that they aren't officially mated yet, so others will set their cap at her.

But the possibilities of other mates is not on Anna's mind. She's worried over Charles still recovering from the Chicago trip and the fact that his father is sending the two of them out into the forest to track a rogue werewolf that is causing trouble. The trouble could be one of two things, it could be a simple rogue, or it could be a power play to intimidate the Marrok and make him back down on his decision to "out" the werewolves, like the fae did twenty years earlier. Neither Charles or Anna think they are in any danger, but Asil knows differently. He is dreaming of her. The young upstart witch who murdered his beloved. The fact that the rogue werewolf has the same markings as Asil's dearly departed Sarai means something. Can a pack of werewolves band together and make a stand against the evil in the forest? Even if that evil might be a very deadly witch.

I loved this spin off from Briggs' Mercy Thompson series. Here we do get a bit more of a romantic boy and girl co-narration going on, but we also get a riveting story and some history. With a smaller cast of characters fighting for survival in the woods, it's kind of like Michael Crichton does werewolves, of course, I should mention that I am a fan of Crichton, and this isn't a slur on the book. Also, delving deeper into the characters that have mainly stayed on the sidelines or in Mercy's back story gives even more depth to the world Briggs has created. From learning about Bran's youth and how he was changed into a werewolf, to Charles' own upbringing and his type of magic. I'll add here, I so want to be able to conjure clothes for myself like Charles does. It seems like such a useful power, especially in the colder climates. I feel like I need a sweater, bam, I have one, awesome! See what I'm saying?

But hands down, it was Asil that rocked my world. A werewolf of legend whose wife was a healer and a wolf and he cultivated roses in Spain till one day their young ward, from a powerful family of witches, turns against him and his life is ruined. So heart wrenching, and so not vampires and fairies. I'm so glad we got to have some witch action in this book, varies it up from the vampire book, fae book, vampire book, fae book pattern that Briggs has established in her previous series. Though I still have some unanswered questions about Walter... but overall, I'm very satisfied, reading to dive into book two and keep my wait for River Marked as painless as possible.

Posted by Miss Eliza at 12:00 AM 2 comments  

Labels: Alpha and Omega, Anna, Asil, Bran, Charles Cornick, Cry Wolf, Michael Crichton, Montana, Omega, Patricia Briggs, River Marked, Sarai, Spain, Werewolves, Witches

Cry Wolf (Alpha and Omega Book 1) by Patricia Briggs
Published by: Ace
Publication Date: July 29th, 2008
Format: Paperback, 320 Pages
Challenge: Shifter Challenge 2011
Rating: ★★★★
To Buy
Anna is off to Montana with Charles. Little does she know that in the dark, snowbound forest, evil is lurking. Leaving Chicago behind is at once exhilarating and terrifying. She no longer has the fear of her pack, she now has the fear of the unknown. What does Charles expect of her? Is he really a good man? Upon landing in Aspen Creek, Anna is all the villagers are talking about. The stoic and cold Charles has found a mate. Too bad the first time that she gets to be presented to the masses is at Doc Wallace's funeral. A time of respect and reflection is turned into a bit of a to-do when another wolf, Asil, makes a bit of a play for Anna, but recoils when he realizes she's an Omega. Later, back at Charles' house, he explains to Anna that she's quite a catch and that they aren't officially mated yet, so others will set their cap at her.

But the possibilities of other mates is not on Anna's mind. She's worried over Charles still recovering from the Chicago trip and the fact that his father is sending the two of them out into the forest to track a rogue werewolf that is causing trouble. The trouble could be one of two things, it could be a simple rogue, or it could be a power play to intimidate the Marrok and make him back down on his decision to "out" the werewolves, like the fae did twenty years earlier. Neither Charles or Anna think they are in any danger, but Asil knows differently. He is dreaming of her. The young upstart witch who murdered his beloved. The fact that the rogue werewolf has the same markings as Asil's dearly departed Sarai means something. Can a pack of werewolves band together and make a stand against the evil in the forest? Even if that evil might be a very deadly witch.

I loved this spin off from Briggs' Mercy Thompson series. Here we do get a bit more of a romantic boy and girl co-narration going on, but we also get a riveting story and some history. With a smaller cast of characters fighting for survival in the woods, it's kind of like Michael Crichton does werewolves, of course, I should mention that I am a fan of Crichton, and this isn't a slur on the book. Also, delving deeper into the characters that have mainly stayed on the sidelines or in Mercy's back story gives even more depth to the world Briggs has created. From learning about Bran's youth and how he was changed into a werewolf, to Charles' own upbringing and his type of magic. I'll add here, I so want to be able to conjure clothes for myself like Charles does. It seems like such a useful power, especially in the colder climates. I feel like I need a sweater, bam, I have one, awesome! See what I'm saying?

But hands down, it was Asil that rocked my world. A werewolf of legend whose wife was a healer and a wolf and he cultivated roses in Spain till one day their young ward, from a powerful family of witches, turns against him and his life is ruined. So heart wrenching, and so not vampires and fairies. I'm so glad we got to have some witch action in this book, varies it up from the vampire book, fae book, vampire book, fae book pattern that Briggs has established in her previous series. Though I still have some unanswered questions about Walter... but overall, I'm very satisfied, reading to dive into book two and keep my wait for River Marked as painless as possible.

Posted by Miss Eliza at 12:00 AM 0 comments  

Labels: 2011 Reading Challenge, Alpha and Omega, Anna, Asil, Bran, Charles Cornick, Cry Wolf, Michael Crichton, Montana, Omega, Patricia Briggs, River Marked, Sarai, Spain, Werewolves, Witches