strange and random happenstance

Earthworld by Jacqueline Rayner
Published by: BBC Books
Publication Date: April 5th, 2001
Format: Paperback, 224 Pages
Rating: ★★
To Buy

The Doctor is off on another adventure with Fitz. Anji, a survivor of their last adventure is looking for a lift home, little does she know that more "adventure" is in store. They appear to land on a prehistoric planet, but everything is off. Soon they realize it's a theme park designed to be like "ancient earth," ie, Anji and Fitz's lovely 20th century. Though anachronisms abound in absurd and disturbing ways. All they really want to do is get back to the TARDIS, but with The Doctor's memory problems... well... will they be able to get out? Separated from each other they soon hear of the deaths that have been plaguing the park. The security team seems to think that it links back to a teenage terrorist organization, oddly named ANJI, but once they all meet the president's three teenage daughters, everyone is pretty sure they're the homicidal maniacs playing their own game within the park. Can a foggy Doctor, one loyal companion, and one inadvertent companion save the day? Or will they become the triplet's newest victims?

I've seriously thought this over and come to the conclusion that all Doctor Who books could only be read by fans of the show. Anyone who would pick up a random Doctor Who book would be at sea, unable to know what was going on. Even if you're just a fan of the current rebooted series, you know a bit about the history, about the past regenerations, you have some basis, some reason for going into a bookstore and picking up this book. I think reading about the eighth Doctor must be like the uninitiated reading just a general Doctor Who book. I had to actually do extensive research online just to figure out who these new companions were and what was going on with The Doctor. In an interesting inverse in proportions, The Doctor with only one appearance in film is the one that everyone writes about. Of course, this does make sense. He doesn't really have a fixed mythology, or character like those set in celluloid. Therefore it feels like a bit of a free for all for authors. Here's someone they can leave their stamp on. They could mold this Doctor into their Doctor.

This lack of restraint has led to some very odd things. Lots of amnesiatic problems, latching onto a fact from the tv movie, weird companions that are simulacra of the real companions that are long gone, hundreds of years where The Doctor was doing nothing, something? Gallifrey is gone? I was just so out of my depth at references and asides that I couldn't really enjoy anything. A good author will help you to understand what exactly is going on, especially if that author was in charge of the eighth Doctor's range of books... but from this outing, I have to say, Jacqueline Rayner isn't a good author. I felt no connection to anyone in the book. How can I like The Doctor if I don't know who he is, I mean, HE doesn't even know who he is!?! As for the companions. Fitz... well, him and The Doctor have tons of past history, you'd think he'd be good to help us understand what was going on? But no, he'll just reference tons of adventures that you have no idea about and will therefore make you want to join the triplets in killing him. As for Anji... well, let's put a pin in that rant for a second why don't we. Yet I will say, Anji should have been our entry into this adventure, being the new kid of the block, but, well, it failed miserably.

Getting to the actual story, well, I have to quote Patrick Stewart on Extras, "I've seen it all." There was so much unoriginality in this story it was mind boggling. I don't mean to always go, hey in this episode of Red Dwarf you're ripping off... but, well, she did rip off Red Dwarf a lot... and it was funny and fresh in Red Dwarf. A book should not make me want to go and watch Red Dwarf instead of reading it right? The way Fitz comes to terms with being "not the original" because he can play wicked guitar, because in the original Fitz's mind he could... well, that's the end of the Red Dwarf episode "Psirens!" As for Earthworld itself, yeah, not that original, and I know Red Dwarf didn't create the idea with the episode "Meltdown"... but all the Elvis stuff... Red Dwarf again. The medieval stuff I kind of liked, and in fact, that's what brought it up a full star, because in those instances there was a unique story with just The Doctor helping this "kingdom." It was contained, it was simple, it didn't rely on me having these vast pools of knowledge from other sources. If this little section had been the book, sigh, what a good book it would have been. But instead I will just be left quoting Patrick Stewart.

Though all this pales to Anji and what she represents. Anji the new companion, having just gotten into the TARDIS to get a lift home after her boyfriend was killed in the previous adventure... an adventure that might have made a better selection for this fiftieth anniversary perhaps, I don't know. But also, you don't ever ask for a lift from The Doctor, you won't be home for awhile, but then, Anji has issues... Anji's internal monologue is just so misogynistic and sets women's lib back years I was SHOCKED that this book was written by a woman. All Anji does is think about herself in a couple with the dear dead Dave, think about her shoes (of course she's wearing high heels), think about how she was wanted by all the other men at her office, yet she was faithful to Dave, and then, in her final "email" to Dave she actually says: "What's a step up from a man? (XY chromosome that is, none of this 'mankind' stuff, women are definitely a step down officially.) " EXCUSE ME!?! If the previous hundred some pages hadn't been a slap in the face for any smart independent woman, you have to state it as clear as possible. We are less? Well, obviously you are. You have some issues. Also the fact that Fitz is having inappropriate thoughts about teenagers, really young teenagers... I think someone needs some therapy. Perhaps it's me for actually finishing this book.

Posted by Miss Eliza at 12:00 AM 0 comments  

Labels: 20th Century, Anji, Doctor Who, Doctor Who Book Challenge, Earthworld, Elvis, Extras, Fitz, Gallifrey, Jacqueline Rayner, Patrick Stewart, Red Dwarf, TARDIS, The 8th Doctor, Womens Rights

Remembrance of the Daleks by Ben Aaronovitch
Published by: BBC Books
Publication Date: 1990
Format: Paperback, 224 Pages
Rating: ★
To Buy

The Doctor and Ace have returned to the beginning, Coal Hill School, London, 1963. The Doctor in his 1st incarnation left behind The Hand of Omega, the device that supposedly gave the Time Lords their control of time. But The Doctor doesn't just leave behind anything that could be dangerous in enemy hands... and the Daleks sure think they could do some damage with this device. In fact two waring factions of Daleks have descended on this small area of London and will fight to the death for this device that could make them masters of time. So what is The Doctor's plan? Let them have it... or at least make sure that the Dalek faction he wants gets it. Therefore the question needs to be asked, what is The Doctor planning and what will happen to the Daleks when they do get The Hand of Omega?

This book is unique in that instead of being an original story it is an adaptation of the episode that launched the shows 25th anniversary. While there might be readers out there that cast a gimlet eye on fleshing out a television episode or movie as a novel I will never be one of them. In fact, I would not be the reader I am today if not for these adaptations. Back in the mists of time... aka the eighties... I was not a big reader, I liked tv, movies, and video games. Then one day I picked up the novelization of the movie Willow (no judging, Willow is freakin' awesome and I will fight anyone who says differently.) I remember one Sunday sitting in my grandparents double wide armchair in the living room, far enough away from the tv so that I could concentrate, and just falling into the book. It was the first time this had happened to me. The movie I knew and loved was fleshed out, expanded, the same, yet different. My love of reading continued from this point, first bridging out into related reading, such as Timothy Zahn's Heir to the Empire, continuing the Star Wars storyline, of which the original trilogy is my most watched films of all time, and then into literature. So why am I saying this? I'm saying this because I do not look down on this book for being what it is, I look down on it for being a bad version of what it is.

Yes, it is a bad adaptation. Now though I'm going to reveal something that will make you question how I can even make this judgement. I've never been the biggest fan of Sylvester McCoy's Doctor, even though he is the only Doctor I have actually met. So... well... here goes... I haven't actually seen the episode "Remembrance of the Daleks." Now you're up in arms saying, you can't judge something if it's based on something you've never seen... well, yes, yes I can. The reason is that this book doesn't work on it's own. A successful novelization has to work on two levels, first it has to work on it's own, then it has to work as a reflection of what it is adapting. If it fails at the first part, the second part is inconsequential. So there. Also, if this book is any reflection of the actual episode, and seeing as they were both written by Ben Aaronovitch, I assume they are, then I never ever want to watch this episode, no matter it's significance, no matter that it delves into The Doctor's past, no matter what, sign me up for a boycott. The book is a jumbled mash of action that maybe made sense on screen, but so didn't on the page that I can't forgive it.

Remembrance of the Daleks just grated on me because it felt like Aaronovitch was trying to use a new medium to jazz up what the show couldn't afford to do. Mainly cool special effects. The special effects were never what Doctor Who was about. The show hung off the acting and the storytelling, not the dubious monsters and sets. So taking a Doctor Who story and just upping the techno babble without adding any true insight just goes against, well, everything Doctor Who. In fairness I think Aaronovitch knew the failings of the book because in his intro he asks to not judge a new writer harshly. Well, I'm sorry that I do have to judge him harshly. He was unable to take a script and flesh it out. The characters are wooden with weird flashbacks to moonlight lovemaking. And that's if you know who the characters even are. He makes no effort to establish place or character and what techno babble he adds is so incomprehensible, the book feels like one giant long rant about Daleks that I found myself reading as fast as I could, when my mind didn't try to wander off to more pleasant thoughts.

Speaking of unpleasant thoughts... Daleks. I'm sick of Daleks, sick sick sick of them. You know why people love the episodes "Blink" or "Silence in the Library?" Because it was something new, something fresh. Not the same old same old again and again. How many times do we have to get ride of the Daleks till they stay dead? Seriously, I want to know so I can wait for that episode to air. Daleks are just stupid. Having them kill each other, even stupider. Yet, this was just one of the many many problems I had. The Doctor being so squeamish about killing one Dalek when, spoiler alert, his plan was to destroy their whole planet and kill them all... well, hypocrite much? I can say that this book has honestly not made me anymore interested in the Sylvester McCoy years... also, it made me realize more and more that if this is the level of storytelling in the final years before the successful reboot it's not a surprise it was cancelled.

Posted by Miss Eliza at 12:00 AM 0 comments  

Labels: Blink, Daleks, Doctor Who, Doctor Who 50th Anniversary, Doctor Who Book Challenge, London, Remembrance of the Daleks, Silence in the Library, Sylvester McCoy, The 7th Doctor, Timothy Zhan, Willow

Fear of the Dark by Trevor Baxendale
Published by: BBC Books
Publication Date: January 6th, 2003
Format: Paperback, 320 Pages
Rating: ★★★
To Buy

The Doctor and his companions, Tegan and Nyssa, are aboard the TARDIS when a malign influence infiltrates Nyssa's dreams. The fact that there is something that could breech the protections of the TARDIS worries The Doctor and he decides they must track this evil to its source. Arriving on the small moon of the benighted Akoshemon, the travelers stumble upon a mining operation masquerading as an archaeological dig. Stoker and her men are hoping to get a jump on the mining Consortium that is pushing honest pirates out of work. Thanks to a hot tip this planet could be Stoker's biggest payday ever, making her and her team millionaires if the Lexium deposits turn out to be as wealthy as supposed. Yet one of her team, Vega Jaal, who comes from a sensitive race of miners, feels that something dangerous is lurking in the depths of the moon and that they should abandon their mission. Nyssa and The Doctor also feel the danger, but there appears to be no way to convince Stoker of the danger.

Then the first death happens. Then they find the door. There is a subterranean lab that appears to have been used for studying suspended animation. But the next two deaths force one of Stoker's team, Bunny, to go behind her back and issue a distress beacon. Of course the only chance of rescue they have is from the Consortium, the very last people Stoker wants to see. They could override her claim on the Lexium find. Yet when they do arrive, it's the Captain that has a bigger effect on Stoker. It's her lost love, Lawrence. As the death toll mounts and the dangers increase, there appears to be a darkness, "the" darkness, that is manipulating events and people to it's own end. Could the destruction that reigned down on Akoshemon happen to the rest of the universe if The Doctor doesn't succeed?

Fear of the Dark is dark in name and dark in nature. This book is so dark that if you're looking for a good time with The Doctor, well, stay well clear. Now this isn't a criticism of the book, far from it, the story and the emotions that play throughout are interesting, terrifying, gut wrenching, and tearful. This book is packed with an emotional punch. Yet like how Houdini died (he didn't have time to prepare for the blows) if you aren't prepared for the depths this book will take you to, well, it will be a rough ride. It mines the depths of human despair, suffering, and loss. I kid you not that death upon death is in your future if you pick this book up. The fact that Baxendale made you care for each character before then killing them shows what a good job he did, that sadistic bastard. At one point I was hopeful that someone other then our core three whose fates weren't in Baxendale's hands would survive... but no. There is no hope. There is no chance of survival. The Doctor's success might save the entire galaxy... but not those he meets on this desolate moon. No chance. No chance at all. Why, you might be asking am I telling you this? Because it was the false hope being ripped out from under me that undid me the most, emotionally. You need to prepare yourself for this book. So you are now hopefully prepared.

As for the 5th Doctor... I've always had such a warm spot for him, and Baxendale captures him and his companions perfectly. What's even more perfect is that this is after Adric's death. Yes Adric, I do hate you so, I'm smiling as I think about your death. Blue star my ass. Ok, back to The Doctor and his companions that are still living... for some reason I must have blocked out Time-Flight (which I'm sure my friend Paul would complement me on) because I didn't realize that Tegan was away from the TARDIS for a year before rejoining The Doctor and Nyssa. Which does play into the story kind of significantly. Which makes me wonder, yet again, who would read these books but die hard fans? I mean, yes, the story does a nice job of kind of explaining what was going on with Tegan and what happened, but even I was a little confused. Now someone who'd never seen any of this series? Well, they'd be lost. But on the plus side, they wouldn't be hearing Tegan's voice in their head during her dialogue in the book, which isn't as annoying by the way as hearing Peri's voice in your head, just fyi. While I'm still dwelling on The Doctor I would like to also compliment Baxendale on creating a book that has not just captured THIS Doctor, but a basic Doctor core. I could just as easily see this story staring 11 and the Ponds.

As for things I really liked, well, Baxendale takes us straight into the action. There is no lenghty set-up. We see The Doctor working among Stoker's team and get flashbacks to how they all met much later on. I can't tell you how refreshing this was. Usually it's tons of time going about explaining that it's just "Doctor" and that he just dropped by and everyone is suspicious until they finally see he's there to help. Instead, bam, he's there, he's helping, he's trusted. Short track to success, switch things up. Two big thumbs up. Of course, the fact that each of the three sections of the book could have used severe editing and seriously, they typos were appalling... plus the depressive nature of the book, well, it did cost the book a star. But way to bring your "A" game Baxendale. And now... for the monster. The writers of Lost should have taken note, this is how you make an unsubstantial monster terrifying. Seriously, The Dark would have that smoke monster pissing himself. Of course, no monster is perfect and his little substantial minion kind of took away a bit of the mystique of this malign nothingness... but no book is perfect, but this is a huge step up from the previous book. Faith restored in this series... onto 6 and Peri...

Posted by Miss Eliza at 12:00 AM 0 comments  

Labels: Doctor Who Book Challenge, Fear of the Dark, Lost, Mining, Nyssa, Peri, TARDIS, Tegan, The 11th Doctor, The 5th Doctor, The 6th Doctor, The Dark, The Doctor, Time-Flight, Trevor Baxendale

Festival of Death by Jonathan Morris
Published by: BBC Books
Publication Date: September 4th, 2000
Format: Paperback, 320 Pages
Rating: ★
To Buy

The Doctor has arrived at the G-Lock, a space station that is the result of a massive pile up two hundred years ago. The G-Lock has become a place of pilgrimage for those wishing to experience The Beautiful Death. The attraction doesn't just simulate what death and the veil beyond is like, but it quite literally kills you and then a short time later brings you back, that's if you're wanting to come back. Though the most recent death has gone horribly wrong turning almost all 218 participates into zombies controlled by some unknown force.

The Doctor and Romana arrive in the aftermath to find that everyone knows them and are heralding The Doctor as their saviour. Problem is, The Doctor's never been here before. Which means only one answer remains, in his future, the G-Lock's past, he comes here and saves everyone. Romana warns The Doctor that crossing their own time streams is very dangerous and they have to be careful not to change anything. If they are fated to die, well, they must face this fact, they can not mess about with time, something a time lord should know. Yet each journey into their past proves that they are inextricably linked to the G-Lock, and it's more then a little frustrating trying to find a time when they were unknown. If they are careful, then the G-Lock will be saved, but their own fates, well, that's another thing.

I'm sure every one of you has had a book that you just can't be bothered to pick up. You know that you just need to bite the bullet and power through, but somehow, you just can't. The longer you avoid the book, the easier it is to accept that you will never finish it. If you are like me, and reading is an integral part of you life, this one book then throws everything in your life out of whack. My moods and emotions are usually keyed into what I'm reading at the moment, if I like the book, life seems easier, if I don't... well, I'm a bit of a grump. This inability to finish yet unwillingness to pick up anything else is the worst situation a reader can face. It doesn't happen to me often. The worst case I suffered was back in August of 2008, the book was Breaking Dawn. While I'm not going to comment on this book by Stephenie Meyer here, that would require far more time and energy then I'm willing to spend on this book review, I will say that it took me an entire month to get through that book. Think of all the other books I could have been reading? While I never allowed Festival of Death that hold on my time, I will say that I begrudge it everything else I could have been reading and will forever hold it against it. Though, in the final analysis, this was the least of this books sins.

My issues with this book started on page one. I am never one to skip the intro, even if it might contain spoilers. I have attempted in recent years to read the intro after the books conclusion, but, well, the majority of these new Doctor Who intros are, how shall I put it, just reveling in the fact that their book was chosen. The first three books had something to offer, a little bit about their love of The Doctor and in particular, why they loved THIS Doctor... not so with Jonathan Morris. Jonathan Morris's intro seems more along the lines of us mere mortals should be privileged to read this glorious book he has written. While until this book he was a humble Eraser fan running the fan club (seriously, dude you really think this is an accomplishment?) then this glorious piece of writing was birthed by him, and, while he won't take all the credit for bringing the wibbly wobbly timey wimey to the Whoverse... oh, who am I kidding, he will take all the credit. He will view the complex time lines and the ability to loop back on your own life as his own amazing creation, forgetting, oh, almost a centuries worth of work that came before him. That Red Dwarf episode, "Future Echoes," the one from 1988, more then a decade before this book, well, forget that, this book totally didn't just rip it off, because, well, Jonathan Morris CREATED timey wimey! In fact, if we take his introduction to heart, using his own timey wimey, he must have created Doctor Who himself and every other time travelling show, literature, what have you, ever. Quantum Leap, totally his. Gaw, this author is so full of himself.

And here is the real snag in the book. Ego aside, the book is just a pastiche of all these other shows and books, that couldn't possibly be as original as Festival of Death because the author says so. I can't tell if it's his naivete as a new writer, or his immense ego that let's him just rip off other writers without a care in the world. These are not nods, these are blatant rip offs. The "reference" to Douglas Adams, ie, the depressed computer ERIC, well, let's just call him MARVIN and move on. I mean, seriously dude, this isn't cool. If you watch Doctor Who, you've read Adams at some point, and well, readers aren't going to let this slide. Adams was a genius, YOU ARE A HACK. The reason I mentioned Red Dwarf above, well, it's because one scene was almost lifted fully from that previously mentioned episode. A good author is able to incorporate other ideas and references into a solid narrative that is original while yet being referential... Jonathan Morris, the author I shall never read again, doesn't do this. The book isn't a cohesive whole, just a bunch of jokes and scenes lifted from other sources and precariously strung together. Here's all the "references" I was able to ferret out, and I'm sure it's by no means exhaustive: The Shining, Alien, Titanic, Lord of the Rings (in particular Gollum), Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban (and yes, I did check release dates so that I am not wrong), and in the end, Being John Malkovich, in the weirdest "nod" yet. Seriously, couldn't the author try anything original? All he did was point out how bad his book was by "referencing" books/movies/whatever that I enjoyed far far more.

In the few rare instances that he tries to show some originality, it comes across as bad jokes or goes against the cannon of the show. The alien races that he encounters, I'm not talking about those little lizard people who are obviously out of the canon of Adams, but the Arboretans... could you think of a lamer name? I'm sorry, but plant based life that is kind of Fern Gully meets Doctor Who and you named them Arboretans? Do they live in the Arboretum near my house? Could you try to think of a non cringe worthy name? Like you're deja vu jokes that made me groan. Preja vu? The stupid running joke about The Doctor not having passed his test to fly the TARDIS. Or the fact that you actually killed The Doctor for thirty minutes and therefore destroyed some of the cannon, because, if he died, he would have regenerated, and well... HE DIDN'T! That is one of the glaring problems of this book. Because we know The Doctor saves the G-Lock, but in doing so he supposedly dies... well, we know he can't die, neither can Romana, because, well, that's not what happens to them, so there is no peril, no impetus to keep reading because we know what happens. I can say I finished the book, but I will never read this author again, I would rather have my brains smashed out by a slice of lemon, wrapped 'round a large gold brick.

Posted by Miss Eliza at 12:00 AM 0 comments  

Labels: Alien, Being John Malkovich, Doctor Who, Doctor Who Book Challenge, Douglas Adams, Gollum, Harry Potter, Jonathan Morris, K-9, Lord of the Rings, Red Dwarf, Romana, Stephenie Meyer, The 4th Doctor, The Shining

Last of the Gaderene by Mark Gatiss
Published by: BBC Books
Publication Date: January 4th, 2000
Format: Paperback, 320 Pages
Rating: ★★★★
To Buy

Wing Commander Alec Whistler fell in love with the town of Culverton, as well as a young lady, when he was stationed there during the war flying spitfires out of the aerodrome. He might have lost the love of his life in an air raid, but thankfully he survived the war and went on to make Culverton his home. Though as the village fete approaches it is a sad day in Culverton because the Ministry of Defense has closed the aerodrome and sold it to a mysterious company, Legion International, "getting us where we want to go." When Legion International breaks the quite of this quaint town with their loud lorries and there black-shirted employees who are a little overzealous in meting out punishment on those that stand in their way, Whistler calls up an old friend with connections to get to the bottom of what is going on.

Brigadier Lethbridge-Stewart is glad to help an old friend. Luckily The Doctor is still hanging around, though his imposed exile on 20th century earth, which included a forced regeneration, has blessedly been lifted, the Brigadier asks for him and Jo Grant to check out the situation in Culverton. The instant they arrive they know something is wrong. The head of operations at Legion International, Bliss, is an odd and secretive woman. Plus, when The Doctor sneaks into the air hangers he sees somethings that don't add up with the company's proposed purpose. Why a vertical wind tunnel? Then the very man they came to meet, Wing Commander Alec Whistler, disappears, and his young neighbor, Noah, who was doing some investigating with Whistler shows up in such a state of shock his life is feared for. Whistler isn't the only one who has disappeared... though some have returned. Different. Smiling. Strange. The Doctor calls in the Brigadier to come to Culverton. He needs his governmental clout, and if that doesn't work, he needs his weapons.

It is no surprise to me that when they chose the lineup of books to mark the 50th anniversary this year that among them was a Mark Gatiss book. Besides being one of the writers for the new series he is a fanboy extraordinaire through and through. Even if you haven't read the book's introduction, where he rhapsodizes about his new Zygon and his three different Jon Pertwee action figures, you just need to watch any one of his Doctor Who Confidentials to realize how much he knows about Doctor Who and how much he loves it. He fits into that rare category that David Tennant and Russell T. Davies occupied on Confidential, where he can just talk for hours on the subject but yet make it interesting. It didn't surprise me in the least when two of the three of these men left Doctor Who that Confidential wasn't able to endure. They were that show. In fact, Mark Gatiss can easily be credited with helping Doctor Who survive during its extended hiatus, during which time he wrote many Doctor Who books, Last of the Gaderene being one of them.

Though all these foreknowledge just made me leery that the book might not live up to the hype that I had created in my own mind. I mean, sure, Gatiss is a successful writer outside the sphere of Doctor Who, quite awhile before I even knew who he was I had picked up his first Lucifer Box book, The Vesuvius Club, based on a blurb on the cover by Stephen Fry, and I wasn't disappointed. In fact his fun camp series fits very well within the same genre as Doctor Who. But the fact has to be pointed out that while a gifted writer, he does have a tendency to stick to a proscribed series of tropes. Gatiss has a predilection for a period atmosphere, usually Victorian or WWII, and a desire to bring in the military... of course, the more I think about this, The 3rd Doctor being The Doctor of his formative years, perhaps these themes are actually a result of Doctor Who! The Doctor being stranded on earth in the 20th Century and having to work with UNIT... yes... this might explain a lot. But it also means that when asked to write a book for said Doctor, well, he didn't disappoint.

If you've picked up this book, you are obviously a Doctor Who fan. I can't really see anyone picking this book up on a whim, though I bet it would still work, but don't take my word for it. There is a chance though that you might not be too familiar with this Doctor. What Gatiss has done is given us a little glimpse, a vignette, of The Third to ease us into the story. While Last of the Gaderene takes place while The Doctor is still working with UNIT, he is no longer technically stranded on earth anymore. In a little side jaunt celebrating his freedom we get some classic Jon Pertwee moments as he races through a jungle in his puffy shirt and tight slacks, white hair haloing his head. A karate chop here and there, celebrating the "action Doctor" that he is with his cape flying behind him. In just this short little chapter you see not only his mannerisms and sartorial choices, but with his willingness to sacrifice himself for someone he barely knows, you see that compassion that is a hallmark of The Doctor. You can also feel the glee that Gatiss had in writing this camp Doctor in all his glory. A true passion for your subject can really go a long way to make the reader love the story as well.

But what made me fall for the book was it's pure Britishness. The real star of this book is the village of Culverton and it's beautiful English way of life that is shattered. The fact that the vicar and The Doctor show the most amount of concern for a tire track tearing up the edge of the village green just makes me giggle with glee, much the way I do for all of Hot Fuzz, which has a similar MO. What appeals to this yank about British television and literature is this quaint idealized way of country life. The village fetes and tombolas. The village green and the local pub. A place that is timeless whenever the story takes place. Yet it's the stories that take it one step further, the ones, like Midsomer Murders, that show us the evil that lurks beneath the surface. They break the sanctity of this idealized life. The calm that is broken with an alien invasion force in full black-shirt regalia. Yes please! I feel it in my bones that this level of campy satire with the dandy of a Third Doctor was perfectly realized with this book and is the first book in this select series which I would heartily recommend, despite the fact that oddly, yet again, we have a "legion" mind meld, telepathic thing going on, which I guess must be the theme... we'll have to see if Tom Baker stumbles onto it next...

Posted by Miss Eliza at 12:00 AM 0 comments  

Labels: David Tennant, Doctor Who, Doctor Who Book Challenge, Hot Fuzz, Jon Pertwee, Last of the Gaderene, Lucifer Box, Mark Gatiss, Midsomer Murders, Russell T. Davies, The 3rd Doctor, The Brigadier, Tom Baker, UNIT, WWII

Dreams of Empire by Justin Richards
Published by: BBC Books
Publication Date: August 3rd, 1999
Format: Paperback, 320 Pages
Rating: ★★★
To Buy

The Haddron Republic has just ended a mighty civil war. One of their leaders, Kesar, took it upon himself to make the Republic an Empire. His Empire. Though his dreams were destroyed by his childhood friend Trayx. They fought a mighty war and in the end Trayx was victorious. Kesar was sentenced to imprisoned exile among the stars. Kesar and his remaining loyal followers would live on Santespri with a garrison of Trayx's soliders. Though his exile isn't what truly brought Kesar low, it's the attack on him after his sentencing, he was disfigured so badly he now wears a metal mask while spending all his time playing chess with his second in command, Cruger. The hope is that chess will make the two of them see why their coupe failed as well as while away the hours.

The TARDIS materializes in a lower section of the castle on Santespri just as Trayx has come to visit Kesar and a murder has happened. At first considered persons of interest, The Doctor, Jamie and Victoria, soon are viewed as allies when The Doctor points out, not only can they not be the murderers, but that there's a ship, an unscheduled ship, heading straight for Santespri, and that they should marshal their resources and get ready for attack. But is the ship coming to rescue Kesar to lead him to the throne he once desired, or is it coming to kill him and make of him the martyr Trayx hoped Kesar would never be. A symbol to rally around and restart the civil war. Or is there more going on then any of them know?

Dreams of Empire is one of those books that struggles to get started. I just wasn't able to connect to this outer space Roman Empire redux with delusions of Napoleon's exile in Elba but peopled with robotic legionnaires. The empire didn't seem logical or even plausible, plus those Cylon wannabes (they are far more advanced then Cybermen, so I'm going with Cylon) being "Legion" well... the hive mind was a little too similar to the previous book about The Doctor I just read, seriously, whomever picked these books didn't really care about diversity of storytelling now did they? Doctor Who usually excels at combining the old with the new, but here it felt like a puzzle that didn't want to fit together right, like there was a piece missing. In his introduction, Justin Richards talks about ancient Rome in a very muddled way with a lot of what ifs. The fact that he seems muddled even in this story's inception I think makes it clear that he would have troubles pulling off this imagined empire. Plus, while I do have a basic grasp of Roman history, Richards seems to almost expect you to know the play by play of the senate and the consuls in order for you to make any sense of the politics. Also, are these people really wearing tunics but have advanced weaponry and bombs? Yeah... not feeling it.

Thankfully everything in the book changes once we get to Kesar's (Serisouly, Kesar? Is he the Quasar Caesar?) exile on Santespri (yep, another asteroid like the last book, sigh). Because then the book isn't about Empires and political backstabbing, then it's about people, people who you feel a real connection to, and lots and lots of chess games. But more importantly it's about The Doctor, and Jamie (woo hoo) and Victoria. The 1st Doctor book I read annoyed me because it could easily have been a book without The Doctor. He could have been omitted entirely and the book would have still worked. He was a background character used to tie up loose ends. Seriously, if you write a Doctor Who book it should have The Doctor front and center all the time. Dreams of Empire not only had The Doctor front and center but perfectly capture both who The Doctor is, but also really captured Patrick Troughton's Doctor perfectly. You could see him so easily in your mind's eye that at times it was a little eerie. Yet I think the true genius of this book relates to something I believe Neil Gaiman said. That while this is a second Doctor story, you could just as easily see Tom Baker or Matt Smith delivering these lines. Justin Richards has caught a hold of the elusive heart of The Doctor that I have felt missing in some of this past season of the show and made this book 100% Doctor.

In fact, The Doctor is able to carry the rest of the book despite its flaws. The book occasionally gets bogged down with technology and almost heist like antics with the security cameras working or being looped. The bad guy is laughably obvious, even how he's doing it is so transparent that you're just waiting for The Doctor to spring his trap. And the "twist" well, how should I put this... ah, I don't want to be rude seeing as I actually liked the book, but, well... it wasn't a twist, just something blindingly obvious. Like so obvious there was an arrow above it in neon going, here's the obvious. In the end, there's just too many historical and technological things vying against each other to make it a truly cohesive story, but somehow, it works. If you can make it a couple of chapters in you won't be disappointed, except perhaps in the fact that the title of the book is repeatedly said by the characters. Here's a good tip for authors, don't obviously use your book title in the book, it's a bit too meta and lame.

Posted by Miss Eliza at 12:00 AM 0 comments  

Labels: Chess, Cybermen, Cylons, Doctor Who, Doctor Who Book Challenge, Dreams of Empire, Jamie, Justin Richards, Matt Smith, Neil Gaiman, Patrick Troughton, Rome, The 2nd Doctor, Tom Baker

Ten Little Aliens by Stephen Cole
Published by: BBC Books
Publication Date: August 22nd, 2002
Format: Paperback, 305 Pages
Rating: ★★★
To Buy

Ten soldiers are sent to an asteroid. With their commander Haunt they are to participate in this final training exercise with the hopes of becoming part of the elite squad in humanities war against the Schirr. As soon as they get to their location things start to go wrong and one of their own goes missing. There is weird vegetation throughout the asteroid that has bioluminescence, as well as flea like bugs that are drawn to it. Chambers throughout have odd pillars and carvings with elaborate glass dangling from the center like free standing stained glass windows or chandeliers. When they stumble into what appears to be the nerve center of this odd asteroid they are in for another shock. Besides finding the leaders of the Schirr rebellion, DeCaster and the ten strong, apparently dead, they also come across an odd blue box. The Doctor is there with Ben, having already misplaced Polly. They are locked out of the TARDIS and are now face to face with soldiers who were not expecting to find anyone living out in this remote sector of space dangerously close to the Morphiean Empire.

Catastrophe soon strikes and the asteroid turns out to be a spaceship on course for the center of the Morpheian Empire, which would start a second war if humans were found breaching their boundaries. The asteroid also seems to be turning against the invaders. There are more disappearances, cave-ins, a few of the party start mutating, but most disturbing of all, the Schirr bodies start disappearing. It feels like they are being toyed with and The Doctor just needs to get his mind around what exactly is going on so that he can stop it before they all die or mutate into something entirely different. But The Doctor is an old man, can he keep up until he and his party can retreat to the safety of the TARDIS?

While I did enjoy Ten Little Aliens, there's a part of me, a rather big part, that says, while I enjoyed it, there was almost too much that annoyed me to actually recommend it to anyone. The book has a very Michael Crichton meets Battlestar Galactica vibe that takes awhile to actually get into and then, once you're fully immersed, does some seriously stupid things that alienate you, confuse you, and then just leave you happy the book has ended. The one thing I have to say is that thankfully the title of the book was deliberately a nod to Agatha Christie, which if it hadn't, would have seriously pissed me off and mystified me. But if you read the introduction, I don't quite get how Stephen Cole wrote this to be like a Christie mystery, but in space... just naming your chapters after Christie books and then having the bodies disappear versus pile up in a reverse of And Then There Were None... well, that's not really enough to categorize it as Christie related. And as for the "unreliable narrator," to quote Inigo Montoya "I do not think it means what you think it means." You need a first person narrator who has been concealing something from us, like in Christie's Endless Night, who turns out to be the villain. Someone we thought was good who turns out not to... well, that's just a plot twist used by almost everyone in fiction. If you want to see Doctor Who do Christie right, just watch the 10th's and Donna's episode "The Wasp and the Unicorn" and skip this author's delusions.

As for the worldbuilding... well... yeah, some things really hit the mark and some were so far off the mark there is no chance we even know where it landed. Characters. There are to many. Ten super soldiers, three from the Tardis, another ten Schirr, two killer robots, and countless other creatures... too much to handle, and this from someone who just read Stephen King's Under the Dome. I gave everyone nicknames, like pilot, geek, scary guy, cyborg, and moved on. Also, besides there being too many characters, they were all unlikable, each and every one. But how could I dislike The Doctor? Because he was irrelevant, a non-entity. He was almost unnecessary and old. He didn't need to be in this book at all, which mystified me, because, excuse me, Doctor Who book! As for the politics of this future world of Schirr and Morphieans... I really have no f'ing clue as to what's going on. The war/politics/genocide/creatures without bodies/dead creatures, was so badly explained that I am still a little mystified ever after The Doctor tried to break it down for me at the end. As for the environment of the asteroid, that was spot on, thumbs up. You did a good job of worldbuilding in the sense of the physical world. I could totally believe myself in dark tunnels with creepy plants and bugs, right on. I just wish Stephen Cole had taken this attention to detail with say, everything else in the book. As for the bad guys... well, these Morphieans constructs, whatever that means, basically, the big baby angels, the putti that liked to pull you to pieces... um, they could give the Weeping Angels a run for the money. Seriously scary. But then again, in the end, overshadowed by the book's failings.

But let me get to what destroyed this book, one full star just knocked right off. The "neural net." This is some kind of network that is a band you wear that connects all the soldiers together, to monitor each other and record their experiences for training purposes, or after The Doctor tinkers with it, so that everyone has access to everyone else's brain. The concept is understandable, but the execution is crap. Everyone starts referring to themselves as "we" so you have no real distinction between the vast overly abundant cast, and it makes everyone sound pompous. Though the nail in the coffin is the almost fifty pages wherein, not only are we stuck in the "neural net" of we's, but it's done as a "choose your own adventure!" Say what? You thought, as a writer, it would be fun? Really, justify this to me because it was just HORRID and pissed me off. Not only that, the writing suffered with bad prompts at the end of sections going: "I wonder what the Doctor is doing" or "Go see what Frog is up to" excuse me? I am not a seven year old who lives and breaths by these books. I never liked them then and I don't like them now. I hate that this book resorted to gimmickry and I am glad I'm done with it. Oh, and don't go on and on about the cover to the old edition in your intro, it makes you seem bitter that they gave it a cooler cover. I'm out, I've disconnected myself from the neural net, laters.

Posted by Miss Eliza at 12:00 AM 0 comments  

Labels: Agatha Christie, And Then There Were None, Choose Your Own Adventure, Doctor Who, Doctor Who Book Challenge, Endless Night, Stephen Cole, TARDIS, Ten Little Aliens, The 10th Doctor, The 1st Doctor

So, earlier, when introducing this three month themed extravaganza I mentioned "The Doctor Who Reading Challenge," and then told you you'd have to wait for an explanation. Well now is the time for said explanation. For us bibliophiles, what better way is there to celebrate Doctor Who then to read lots and lots of Doctor Who books? In fact, the written and audio books should be lauded as what kept the show alive during the years it was dark. We got new stories from new authors, some of which went on to then write on the show! Mark Gatiss anyone? So yeah books and yeah Doctor Who!

The idea behind this book challenge is that there are 11 Doctors so far (remember we're not quite 100% sure what they're doing with John Hurt and the 12th doesn't come round supposedly till Christmas, I'm guessing it will be at the 50th though). The 50th anniversary is in the 11th month of the year. So the idea is to each month count down till the 50th by reading a book staring that months Doctor. So January would be the 1st Doctor all the way till November would be the 11th Doctor, you get the idea. I'm more condensing this into an epic read crammed into three months, and this is for a multitude of reasons, my other themed months being one of them. But my main reason was I was figuratively paralyzed... what books to read? I mean, I have a lot of 9th and 10th Doctor books lying about, and a few 11th. Then there's a few old 4th Doctor paperbacks I have somewhere... but which ones to read? Then I started to make a list based on authors I love who wrote Doctor Who books, you know, Mark Gatiss, Paul Magrs, George Mann, those ones... but so many of them are out of print. Grrr I say.

So the BBC came to my rescue. I don't know if they had planned this all along for the 50th, or, if hearing about this book challenge, went "Aha! A marketing idea we can exploit!" So what they did was re-release eleven books, one for each Doctor, in nifty new and special 50th Anniversary editions (seen above on my Doctor Who shelf, and yes, I have a Doctor Who shelf, no judging). So viola! My reading list was made. Of course the books didn't come out till April, so there's four months wasted right there, so time to cram some reading in now! Therefore, over the next few weeks, one of the features of my 50th Anniversary Special is the review of said books... here's hoping these live up to the name of The Doctor (whatever that name might be)!

Posted by Miss Eliza at 12:00 AM 0 comments  

Labels: 12th Doctor, Doctor Who, Doctor Who 50th Anniversary, Doctor Who Book Challenge, George Mann, John Hurt, Mark Gatiss, Paul Magrs, Reading Challenge, The 10th Doctor, The 11th Doctor, The 9th Doctor

I think it can go without saying, but I'll say it anyway: I love Doctor Who. While I haven't been around nearly as long as The Doctor, growing up in the late 70s and early 80s thanks to PBS The Doctor has always been a part of my life. I can literally not think of a time when I didn't know who he was. Therefore, I couldn't miss this opportunity, this once in a lifetime chance to celebrate Doctor Who. The Doctor has been gracing our lives for fifty years! Just think of that, that's half a century. Sure, half a century is no time at all to a Time Lord claiming to be around 1200 years old. But to us mere mortals, us humans, this is a long time and our love for him just seems to grow and grow. Will this show go for another fifty years? I can't tell you, my guess would be no, but if it does, I plan on being around to see it happen. But for now, let us revel, let us take delight in the fact that he has been here this long and shows no sign of retiring the TARDIS.

So how does one mark fifty years? Isn't silver something something like the wedding equivalent? Yeah, you can really see I pay attention... or maybe it's diamonds... nope, totally wrong, it's gold. Moving on... for me, the marking of this occasion will be much watching of Doctor Who, much reading of Doctor Who, much thinking about Doctor Who and then, most likely, much crying once Matt Smith leaves (damn you Moffat). As for how I'm celebrating on my blog... well, I'll reminisce about The Doctor and my life, then I'm doing the Doctor Who Book Reading Challenge, you'll have to wait for an explanation if you don't know what it is, then I'll talk about how the Whoverse has expanded beyond just The Doctor and, seeing as this goes right into the holidays, crafty me (as in glue and yarn, not manically laughing and rubbing my hands) will show you how to do the holidays up in true Doctor Who fashion, on the cheap. So sit back, grab your sonic screwdriver, bundle up in an appropriate Tom Baker scarf, and let's get this party started*!  

*It starts with prizes!

The Prize:
A copy of Chicks Dig Time Lords edited by Lynne Thomas and Tara O'Shea which is a MUST for any Whovian, and in particular, any girl out there who loves The Doctor. Essay authors range from my most favorite of authors, Mary Robinette Kowal (she's a fan of the 9th), to Captain Jack's own sister, Carole Barrowman, who is pretty kick ass awesome in her own right.

The Rules:
1. Open to EVERYONE (for clarification, this means international too), just because you haven't been following me all along doesn't mean you don't matter, you just get more entries and prizes if you prove you love me by following.

2. Please make sure I have a way to contact you if your name is drawn, either your blogger profile or a link to your website/blog or you could even include your email address with your comment(s) or email me.

3. Contest ends Tuesday, December 31st at 11:59PM CST (yes, I know it's New Year's Eve, so get those entries in early)

4. How to enter: Just comment in the space below!

5. And for those addicted to getting extra entries:

• +1 for answering the question: Who is YOUR Doctor (as in 1-11, I guess you can have 12, though that would be a little silly now wouldn't it)?
• +2 for becoming a follower
• +10 if you are already a follower
• +10 for each time you advertise this contest - blog post, sidebar, twitter (please @eliza_lefebvre), etc. (but you only get credit for the first post, so tweet all you like, and I thank you for it, but you'll only get the +10 once). Also please leave a link! There's a handy code on the side for your sidebars!
• +25 if you comment on any of the posts during the Doctor Who Celebration, with something other than "I hope I win" or a variation thereof.

Posted by Miss Eliza at 12:00 AM 3 comments  

Labels: Captain Jack, Carole Barrowman, Chicks Dig Time Lords, Doctor Who, Doctor Who 50th Anniversary, Doctor Who Book Challenge, Giveaway, Lynne M. Thomas, Matt Smith, PBS, Sonic Screwdriver, Time Lord, Tom Baker