Outlander: Blood of My Blood
With the end of Outlander upon us it was only natural that Starz would expand the universe to hold onto their rabid fan base. Readers of Diana Gabaldon logically assumed that the Lord John series of historical mysteries would be adapted. After all, fans are familiar with Lord John Grey as played by the perpetually put upon David Berry. I mean seriously, if you want to see him really suffer watch A Place to Call Home. So they'd have a more than willing built-in audience. So of course they announced that they were doing a prequel because it wasn't time yet for Lord John Grey... OK... So, I have questions. And issues. First, prequels. I have issues with prequels and not just because of the damage inflicted on me by George Lucas. The main problem I have is that we know what's going to happen. We know where this story ends. It's a rare prequel that is able to impart something new and of worth. Literally I can think of one, and that's Andor. Here there are just so many characters I hated but I knew they weren't going to die because they show up in Outlander. And while we have time travel we don't have alternate timelines, so, I'm stuck with them. I mean, I really want to know who was like, hey, what if Jaime and Claire's parents met? Because this is just pointless drawn out speculation. Sure, I like the idea that instead of Claire's parents dying in a car crash they were flung from the vehicle and ended up flung into the past. Though I still question where the stone was that transported her father was located. Was it up his ass? Because I literally do not know if I have seen worse acting than Jeremy Irvine as Henry Beauchamp. In fact the core four cast members seemed to be hired because of a resemblance in their appearance to the original cast, not for acting abilities. I will obviously not tar Jaime's mother Ellen with the same brush because Harriet Slater is an amazing actress being magnificent on both Pennyworth and Belgravia: The Next Chapter. If I were in her shoes I would have taken this role as well, she'll be set as an actress for many years. I just wish that the show was worthy of watching it for many years. The conceit wasn't even worthy of ten episodes. And as for the fact there's going to be a second season!?! This could have literally been a one-off special, a nice, what if, instead this was a morass of ass. As in you'll see a lot of ass. My main gripe is that Henry is a white man with power and money who is out of his time and yet all he does is bitch about how he can't find his wife because he's... ENGLISH! Dood, you could have found her if you had stopped disassociating and sleeping with a prostitute. Are we supposed to feel sorry for him because he has shell shock? Because I was just shocked by how bad he acted. Oh, and was the Midsommar levels of insanity birth scene cum witch trial supposed to be funny? Because it might be the only part of the show that brought me joy. Though I might throw in Ellen trying to prove she was a virgin by holding her urine. This show it just female trauma over and over showing that society viewed them as nothing by witches or whores or both. I really don't need this in my life. Sure, I might miss Outlander, but not enough to watch this again.
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