Showing posts with label Newt's Emerald. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Newt's Emerald. Show all posts

Friday, March 31, 2017

Book Review - Joe Hill's Heart-Shaped Box

Heart-Shaped Box by Joe Hill
Published by: William Morrow Paperbacks
Publication Date: June 18th, 2013
Format: Paperback, 400 Pages
Rating: ★★★★
To Buy

Judas Coyne acquired quite the reputation as a death-metal rocker. His love of the macabre has resulted in a unique collection of grim occult artifacts. Those from ardent fans and those he has sought out himself. From cooking for cannibals to a used hangman's noose, though perhaps the oddest item in his possession is an honest to goodness snuff film. But he doesn't have a ghost. Jude's assistant Danny discovered the listing on an online auction house. A woman is selling the spirit of her step-father which she is convinced has attached itself to his Sunday suit. This is bona fide proof of the afterlife and Jude wants it, buying it immediately for $1,0000. If only he knew why this suit was for him and what would happen once it arrived at his New York farm in a heart-shaped box. There is no doubt that the suit is haunted and the ghost is a vengeful spirit set on destroying Jude. Because Jude hasn't just spent his life collecting supernatural specimens, he has also collected groupies. Each named after the state they're from he hopes one day to have a complete set. His current squeeze is Georgia. But the ghost? The ghost is there because of Florida. And the ghost won't settle until Jude, Georgia, and anyone close to them is dead. The couple set out on a road trip with Jude's two dogs, Angus and Bon, in tow. They aim to exorcise the poltergeist. But will it kill them first?

Every once in awhile you stumble on a book that you know is flawed, you no it's not perfect, in fact you have many issues with it, but it's still somehow the right book at the right time and you devour it as fast as you can and enjoy the ride. For me that was Heart-Shaped Box. I had just finished reading the abysmal Newt's Emerald and, masochist that I am, had heard that the original e-book version was different than the printed version and as I already had it... I therefore tortured myself by reading the EXACT SAME BOOK. TWICE! Picking up Heart-Shaped Box after this experience was a relief. I should have realized once I started the book that Joe Hill was Stephen King's son, because the book had the same feeling, that quality of fast food, you know you shouldn't, but you crave it and enjoy it the whole time and then wonder at the end if perhaps it was worth it. For me it was. This book tapped into a more modern Gothic sensibility than Shirley Jackson. Shirley Jackson's writing is timeless, whereas this felt more of the moment, of the now. I don't think it will stand up over time but it does capture the time in which it was written, the feel of the American Gothic of that precise moment. Of music and road trips and hauntings from memories and past sins and actual real ghosts. Oh, I was SO ready for this book.

Because while this is a ghost story at the same time it's not really a ghost story. Like his own father, Hill explores the idea of what exactly ghosts truly are. Because while Jude is literally being haunted by the ghost of Craddock he is also haunted by his past, mainly his own father. Yes, Hill went there, much like his father did with Jack Torrance's daddy issues, but with the added irony that King is his own father... oh, can we say meta? Which is why Jude isn't able to defeat the actual ghost without confronting his own ghosts, by going home again. In a messy final act Jude is able to defeat Craddock by confronting the life he ran away from. Because memories, past experiences, emotions, they imprint on us and the world around us, they leave a residue. I always think of the Torchwood episode "Ghost Machine" where the team encounters "ghosts" which turn out to be fragments of emotion and memory imprinted on time. As Captain Jack says: "Human emotion is energy. You can't always see it, or hear it, but you can feel it. Ever had deja vu? Felt someone walk over your grave? Ever felt someone behind you in an empty room? Well, there was. There always is." That episode was able to shift my perception of the paranormal so that I was able to appreciate what Hill himself is doing in his approach to the concept of ghosts.

Yet for what the book got right it is flawed. In several regards, but to me and most members of my book club the biggest flaw was in the treatment of animals. If you are at all squeamish about animal abuse... this book has a lot of troubling incidents not for the faint of heart. I mean, yes, you should know what you're getting into, this is Gothic Horror, but still, animal cruelty is a whole separate kettle of fish. I seriously think I could handle the most graphic of depravities humans can inflict on each other but if a puppy or kitty dies, I can't deal. So know this going in, Angus and Bon are going to die. Horribly. Both from gunshot wounds protecting Jude as his familiars. Yet their deaths could have been noble if Jude had deserved their sacrifice. Because throughout the book, even before his trouble with Craddock, he treats these lovely dogs like shit. THAT is unacceptable. These dogs love him blindly and as is obviously apparent, he was unworthy not just of their love but any love. This story, to an extent, has a redemptive side, but I think there is no redemption for someone who mistreats animals. More than that, both dogs didn't have to die. Angus survived the initial fight that killed Bon and IF he had been taken to a vet and not thrown in the back seat of Jude's car, there was a chance. But he's just left there in pain to bleed to death. That's unacceptable.

But then again Jude and Georgia do some of the stupidest things imaginable. They never do what's logical. Then again, does anyone in horror do anything logical? There's a reason the Scream movies, poking fun at the stupidity of the horror genre, were so popular. Why would they take Angus to the vet when they don't even go to the hospital for Georgia's finger. This is perhaps the most vomit inducing aspect of the entire book. Georgia pricks her finger on a pin attached to Craddock's haunted suit. It quickly goes septic. The details are kind of lavished on this disgusting injury. Instead of going to the hospital she spends much time ignoring it or sucking on it like a little child with a wound. I'm not even going to address the issues that insight brings to light, but just harp on about the fact she never went to a hospital. I mean, she was convinced it was supernatural so that obviously it would only get worse until they defeated Craddock. How does she know this? Yes, she's kind of zoning out occasionally and watching snuff films in a trance, but I personally would demand an examination by a medical professional prior to blaming it on spirits. Who knows what could have been put on that pin as a secondary offensive attack? Plus. Just too much eww for me.

The nail in the coffin though, as it were, is that in the end this book is predictable. Because the trope that is the card played too often is sexual abuse, this time used with a side of incest. Obviously Florida had to have had a horrible upbringing to have her kill herself and to have Craddock have a need to exact revenge, but is sexual abuse the only trauma available? It certainly seems that way from all the books and TV shows and movies that go to that explanation. What I wouldn't give for say a serial killer or a cult, anything that doesn't go straight to the creepy sex place. But I think the reason why it always comes back to sexual abuse is because this is the worst it could be. Everyone can imagine the horror. Everyone can imagine the shame however unwarranted. Everyone can imagine it and wish it away. In fact, I wonder, how many people, when asked what their worst nightmare was wouldn't say sexual abuse? Hill though has a need to compound the creep factor by having Florida's sister complicit in the abuse and even offering up her own daughter to Craddock. This takes it to a level of creepy that I just don't want to go to. But more than that, I felt that because of who Jude is, because of the damaged women he drew to himself, it was just too expected. So while this book is a journey I enjoyed, it wasn't one that was always scenic and unexpected. Like a commute, there are some days it feels nice, familiar, but in no way was it unique.

Friday, March 4, 2016

Book Review - Gath Nix's Newt's Emerald

Newt's Emerald by Garth Nix
Published by: Katherine Tegen Books
Publication Date: October 13th, 2015
Format: Hardcover, 304 Pages
Rating: ★
To Buy

To celebrate Truthful Newtington's eighteenth birthday her father has invited the people she loves most in the world, her three cousins, Edmund, Stephen, and Robert, for a family dinner. The five of them have a wonderful repast where Truthful's father regales them with stories of his time at sea. Though his weather magic does accidentally bring on a real gale. Yet a small squall will soon be the least of their worries. While Truthful won't inherit the famous Newtington Emerald until she's in her twenties, her father brings it out from it's hiding place and they are all mesmerized by it's worth as a stone and it's power as a magical artifact. But the unthinkable happens and the emerald is stolen. Truthful's father is taken to bed and he blames the three young cousins. In an attempt to clear their names they vow to Truthful that they will solve this heist and restore her father's health. Frustrated that she can't go out into the world and try to find the emerald for herself Truthful concocts a plan. She was supposed to leave for her Great Aunt's house in London in a few weeks to be presented and have her first season. What if she just left a few weeks earlier and used that time to find the emerald? Dragging her begrudging maid Agatha along, Truthful has no idea of the adventures and dangers that await her in the thriving metropolis. With her Great Aunt's help they concoct a male identity for Truthful based on a distant relative so that she may move freely in the quest for the emerald. Truthful's alter ego soon has a compatriot, a Major Charles Harnett. Yet working with him so closely he's bound to find out the truth of her secret identity and her heart. Little does she know that no one is as they appear.

In his author's note Garth Nix freely admits that Newt's Emerald started out as a plot contrivance of another very different sort of book. I have to wonder if perhaps it should have stayed that way. It's like someone told him Regency sells really well and he went to his trunk and dusted off the skeletal remains of that previous book, forgetting that there's a reason trunk books stay in the trunk. Also, for a Regency book to sell, perhaps get the Regency right? Seriously, I CAN NOT stress this enough. If you are writing a period book, even if it's fantasy during a certain period, you need to know the societal conventions and mores so that IF you decide to break them you at least know that you are. Nix needed to spend more time actually doing research instead of re-reading all of Georgette Heyer and Patrick O'Brien. Or at least re-read all of Austen, instead of just a few. Austen wrote six books yet Nix had time to read all twenty-one books in the Aubrey-Maturin series? Not to mention all twenty-six Heyer Regency romances! I'm not slamming these books, it's just they are written after the fact by modern authors. To get an actual feel about the period read books from that period. There's more then one reason people revere Austen, and one is how she perfectly captures the time period in which she lived!

Or how about a reference book? What Jane Austen Ate and Who Charles Dickens Knew by Daniel Pool will fix such glaring errors of Truthful being improperly addressed. She is the eldest, and in fact only daughter of Admiral Newtington and therefore should be addresses as Miss Newtington, never Miss Truthful, which anyone who read Pride and Prejudice should know! Jane Bennet is addressed as Miss Bennet because she is the oldest, while Elizabeth, being younger, is addressed as Miss Elizabeth Bennet. But that is if Truthful wasn't a peeress. Instead she should be addressed as Lady Truthful Newtington, NEVER drop that Newt! I mean you can find this by simply googling "how to address a lady in the regency period" and seeing as Nix seems too busy to even provide a full glossary for his readers and tells them to use google, well the LEAST he could do is abide by his own ruling. But this doesn't even come close to the faux pas of Truthful dancing with men she has never been introduced to! What heathen society is this I'm reading about. This is not good ton! And this doesn't even scratch the surface of the sartorial errors. Gloves in the house! Bonnets at the dinner table! You'd look ridiculous carrying a reticule from room to room in your own house! And has Nix EVER seen a Regency silhouette, voluminous skirts my eye! The waist doesn't drop till 1820 with the skirts not going wide till 1825!

But the glaring errors weren't my only problem with the book. The fact that it goes on overly long was one, which I thought might be fixed reading the original novella, PS, it wasn't, because it was exactly the same and I was basically tricked into reading this book twice. Also I might have been a little more forgiving of Nix's lackadaisical attitude to the Regency if he had bothered to create a world that was interesting. Or at least logical. Reading other reviews I saw time and time again that the number one criticism of this book for those who aren't Regency obsessives was the lack of a convincing system of magic. Worldbuilding is KEY no matter if you are tweaking an already extant world or creating a new one. But seeing as Nix couldn't even properly reflect reality how can he be expected to create an entirely new magic system? There's obviously fairies, but how do they figure in? Glamors are key but how exactly do physical charms break them? Then there's weather magic... so one might assume that there is elemental magic... just where does this come from? How is it used? You can't just drop things all over the place and not explain them. Is magic primarily in the upper classes? Is it exclusive to women or men or are they equal? Just something please. Some basic rules. Like focus on the elemental magic, go with that. Build on that. Just build something. ANYTHING! BUILD YOUR WORLD! And what's with the talking to animals?

If we strip away all the fripperies as Nix sees them, such as historical accuracy and worldbuilding, we are basically left with Twelfth Night. I've never been a big fan of girls dressing up as boys to go fight or save the family honor or protect themselves. It's always seemed cliched and unbelievable and most of all trite. Which is probably why I hate Shakespeare's Twelfth Night so much. It's entirely unbelievable to me that Viola could pass as Cesario. Therefore I don't believe that Truthful could pass as the Chevalier. Yes, they make a big to-do that this wouldn't work without that little bit of glamor, but seriously? Ugh. I know it's all about saving the family honor and being a hero, or heroine as the case would be, but it's just so played out. And the falling in love with the hero while in disguise, gag me now. When it came out that her "disguise" actually makes her look like her cousin Stephen, I almost banged by head against the wall. Damn you Shakespeare and Twelfth Night! This is a hackneyed story. This type of story is over, it's done. It should have been killed off in 1985 with the horrid movie Just One of the Guys. Yes, there might be someone out there who could bring some originality to it, but it's not Nix and it's definitely NOT Newt's Emerald.

What made me even more annoyed with the cross-dressing trope was that all the adults in Truthful's life seemed to be in the know and were indulging her with a wink and a nudge. Excuse me? Her guardians were indulging her impropriety and the possibility of her being ruined? It just seems too unlikely. This wasn't exactly a time when people shook their heads and said "kids will be kids." This was a time following a very harrowing war with danger still lurking in the shape of French foreign agents and well gosh darn it all, let Truthful risk her life if she's having some fun. While yes, the only character I actually liked in the book was Truthful's Great Aunt Ermentrude because while appearing respectable she really was an exotic and wild old doyenne who sat around with scimitars and wore fezzes, she made an effort to be conventional in the eyes of society. So while, yes, she herself might conceivably be a little indulgent in Truthful's behaviour, I really think she should be more concerned with her great niece's welfare and reputation. By the time Ermentrude and Charles's aunt, Lady Otterbrook, are conspiring to make a match of the two young ones they seem gleeful with innuendo and sly asides. This isn't the French Court before the revolution people! This is staid old England, and while it was more human than some history makes it, there's just no credibility in the version that Nix is presenting us. There is just annoyance and a lot of rage reading. Twice over in my case.

Wednesday, March 2, 2016

Garth Nix

Garth Nix (yes it's his real name) was born in 1963 in Melbourne, but raised in Canberra, which is the capital of Australia. Originally intending to be a solider he soon turned away from that insular world and focused on his love of writing. Nix got a BA in professional writing from Canberra University, but had to supplement his income with, well, an income, till he was able to quit his day job and become a full-time writer in 2001. Yet during those years of struggling to be a writer he was always on the periphery of the literary world. Starting in a Canberra bookshop after graduating he has since been a literary agent, a marketing consultant, a book editor, a book publicist, a book sales representative, and finally a full-time author. Nix's wife is even in the literary world, being a publisher. Though as Nix has pointed out, all these jobs didn't help him get his leg up as an author, just kept him connected with that world.

The fact that he is a fantasy writer should come as no surprise when you learn he spent his formative years playing Dungeons and Dragons, only to go on to write scenarios and articles for the RPG. His books, which have sold more than five million copies around the world and appeared on numerous bestsellers lists, include the award-winning young adult fantasy novels Sabriel, Lirael, Abhorsen, and Clariel, which is a prequel to the Old Kingdom trilogy; the dystopian novel Shade’s Children; and the space opera A Confusion of Princes. His fantasy novels for children include The Ragwitch; the six books of The Seventh Tower sequence; The Keys to the Kingdom series; and the Troubletwisters series and Spirit Animals: Blood Ties (co-written with Sean Williams). And while he might live in a Sydney beach suburb with his family, in his newest book, Newt's Emerald, he inhabits England during the Regency era with a magical romance.

Monday, October 12, 2015

Tuesday Tomorrow

The Adventuress by Tasha Alexander
Published by: Minotaur Books
Publication Date: October 13th, 2015
Format: Hardcover, 304 Pages
To Buy

The official patter:
"Emily and husband Colin have come to the French Riviera for what should be a joyous occasion - the engagement party of her lifelong friend Jeremy, Duke of Bainbridge, and Amity Wells, an American heiress. But the merrymaking is cut short with the shocking death of one of the party in an apparent suicide. Not convinced by the coroner's verdict, Emily must employ all of her investigative skills to discover the truth and avert another tragedy."

So excited for a new Lady Emily book! Now if only she has an event nearby...

Newt's Emerald by Garth Nix
Published by: Katherine Tegen Books
Publication Date: October 13th, 2015
Format: Hardcover, 304 Pages
To Buy

The official patter:
"Inspired by the works of Georgette Heyer and Jane Austen, Garth Nix's Newt's Emerald is a Regency romance with a fantasy twist. New York Times bestselling author Gail Carriger calls it "charming; quite, quite charming."

After Lady Truthful's magical Newington Emerald is stolen from her she devises a simple plan: go to London to recover the missing jewel. She quickly learns, however, that a woman cannot wander the city streets alone without damaging her reputation, and she disguises herself as a mustache-wearing man. During Truthful's dangerous journey she discovers a crook, an unsuspecting ally, and an evil sorceress—but will she find the Emerald?"

Yes please! Regency fantasy, it's already a great book just from the description! 

The Story of Diva and Flea by Mo Willems and Tony DiTerlizzi
Published by: Disney-Hyperion
Publication Date: October 13th, 2015
Format: Hardcover, 80 Pages
To Buy

The official patter:
"Diva, a small yet brave dog, and Flea, a curious streetwise cat, develop an unexpected friendship in this unforgettable tale of discovery.

For as long as she could remember, Diva lived at 11 avenue Le Play in Paris, France. For as long as he could remember, Flea also lived in Paris, France-but at no fixed address. When Flea fl neurs past Diva's courtyard one day, their lives are forever changed. Together, Diva and Flea explore and share their very different worlds, as only true friends can do."

Um, two of my most favorite author illustrators doing a book together that stars a tuxedo cat? What isn't to love?

The Princess in Black and the Perfect Princess Party by Shannon and Dean Hale
Published by: Candlewick
Publication Date: October 13th, 2015
Format: Hardcover, 96 Pages
To Buy

The official patter:
"Inconvenient monster alarms, a sparkly array of princess guests, and spot-on slapstick pacing make for a party readers will celebrate.

Today is Princess Magnolia’s birthday party, and she wants everything to be perfect. But just as her guests are arriving . . . Brring! Brring! The monster alarm! Princess Magnolia runs to the broom closet, ditches her frilly clothes, and becomes the Princess in Black! She rushes to the goat pasture, defeats the monster, and returns to the castle before her guests discover her secret. But every time Princess Magnolia is about to open her presents, the monster alarm rings again. And every time she rushes back—an inside-out dress here, a missing shoe there—it gets harder to keep the other princesses from being suspicious. Don’t those monsters understand that now is not a good time for an attack?"

Yeah! More new Shannon Hale collaborative books with her husband!

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