Friday, March 17, 2023

Book Review - John Darnielle's Devil House

Devil House by John Darnielle
Published by: MCD
Publication Date: January 25th, 2022
Format: Hardcover, 416 Pages
Rating: ★
To Buy

Every town has an urban legend. A mystery or a murder that has captivated the minds of the locals and passed into lore. Gage Chandler just happened to turn his town's tale into a bestseller. A local teacher violently killed two of her students during an attempted burglary and was caught while taking their dismembered bodies to the beach in an attempt to dump them in the ocean. The White Witch of Morro Bay made a name for Gage and he has been looking for his followup project ever since. And then he hear's about "The Devil House." The house is in Milpitas, California, which is why no one has heard about it. The town became infamous for a grisly crime that happened in 1981 that ended up serving as inspiration for the movie River's Edge. The locals did not like the national attention. So when another murder happened with satanic overtones they hushed it up. "The Devil House" just happens to be up for sale. So not only could Gage write his next bestseller about the case he could write it at the scene of the crime. This PR stunt alone could generate huge sales. So Gage moves into "The Devil House." The home has been through many changes between when it was first built and it's infamy. But during the crime it was an abandoned store that sold pornography with booths in the back to watch videos. The "Monster Adult X" sign was still on the roof of the building when some teens moved in and decided to redecorate it as their clubhouse. The teens got very territorial and when the owner one day showed up with a potential buyer the interlopers were brutally murdered with a sword. But as expected Gage finds the locals aren't at all receptive to his arrival in their town. They don't want to talk about the murder, and they really don't want to talk about Derrick and Seth, the two kids who are the most likely culprits. Because that's another aspect of this case that is curious, no one was ever caught and charged with the murders. So Gage does what he does best. He immerses himself in the crime. He buys crime scene pictures off eBay and takes the interior of the house back to what it looked like when the murders happened. He becomes so entrenched that he can't be sure if he's writing a book now or living it.

As most reviewers with any sense have pointed out, this book is a bait and switch. The cover, the hype, everything about this book screams horror, and yet what it is isn't really clear even after you read it, but one thing is clear, it's not horror. Devil House is perhaps the sloppiest manuscript I have ever read. I am not even going to deign to call it a book because it needed several more passes to make it even legible and omit severe chronological issues, such as the constantly shifting date of the two murders at "The Devil House." The writing is beyond amateurish. In fact I take back manuscript and shall call this word salad. And seriously, don't get me started on the fake ye olde english that pops up in the "Song of Gorbonian" section. It's some of the worst writing I've ever read. This word salad has the pretensions to greatness, and instead comes off as a preposterous waste of time. As for the second person narration? Well, firstly, second person narration should be used sparingly, not for hundreds of pages, but what's more is that it isn't really second person narration, it's first person masquerading as second person wherein it's really the author talking to the murderess. I mean, what the fuck man? Really!?! You want to go there? You think you're Joe Goldberg? Joe Goldberg knows literature and he'd kill you for the crimes against it you've committed. But what's the worst sin in this book is everything is purposefully obfuscated and elliptical and talks around the subject in some attempt to make a statement on what is truth, what is really going on here, and in the end, it doesn't matter. Because, huge spoiler here, Gage Chandler has made it all up. There were no teenagers, there was no Satanic Panic, it's all BS in an attempt to what, write a book? To reclaim fame? To claw his way out of the insanity he'd driven himself to? Seriously, the ending negates the whole book, the whole story of "The Devil House." I mean, the whole "book" is so badly written and self-aware there was no way it could have clawed it's way back out of the grave it had dug to make me actually like it. But I was impressed that it made me hate it even more.

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