Friday, November 4, 2011


It's said everyone has a novel in them... if that's true then November, being National Novel Writing Month, is going to prove it. Every year I think, man, I should do this, and every year I don't. One year I will, because will the superfluity of words I write in this blog every year indicates that perchance I could write words in book form too. Though maybe non-fiction... Many authors even do this. Why? Because it's a way to get your ass in motion, also, a way to entertain you readers with really funny bios, Patrick Rothfuss's being the funniest I've read in years:

"Patrick Rothfuss sprung fully formed from Marge Rothfuss, his mother, in Madison Wisconsin. In a mere three months, Pat grew to the height of a man while teaching himself to read and write using only a shovel and a dead cat.

When the voices told him to, Pat left home to attend college in at University Wisconsin Stevens Point where he joined Slytherin house and had many wonderful adventures. After graduating, Pat evolved into a being of pure light and energy. Then he went to grad school and evolved even further into being composed entirely of bile, rage, binder twine, and sweet, sweet, methadone. After grad school Pat joined forces with five plucky Japanese schoolgirls to form a giant robot that fights crime.

Through all of this Pat has read fantasy, watched fantasy, and written fantasy. Some academics have suggested that Pat eats, sleeps, and breathes fantasy, but this is simply untrue. The truth is that Pat eats burritos, sleeps like a drooly baby, and breathes a white-hot plasma composed of molten gold and rage."

Damn, I wish I could have a bio half as cool...


Newer Post Older Post Home